Am I alone in feeling guilty for being ill?

I’ve got the lurgy, just common-a-garden winter lurgy and I have all the usual symptoms, coughing up rubble, sweating, shivering, chest pains, you know that the kind of thing, but it’s interfering with my routine something shocking, yesterday for example I didn’t go for my normal run and I felt really guilty, why? No one except me cares if I run or not, then I started to think about all the other stuff I feel guilty about due my thyroid doing what none working thyroids do, stuff like...

1: Mood swings and irritability (Spouse, “have you taken a screaming meanie pill today?)

2: Lack of stamina, suddenly not being able to cut the grass/paint that wall/wash that car when I said I would.

3: Being unsocial, pick a social situation and I don’t want to be in it.

4: Leaving work as I just couldn’t think how to do it anymore. That was a biggie!!

5: Being irrational, I know it’s irrational it doesn’t mean I don’t feel it!!!

6: Wanting to run away from it all and everyone change my name and spend my remaining years drinking beer on a beach somewhere where no one knows me and I don’t have to speak to anyone.

7: Wondering if I can get away with punching my GP

8: Thinking about me and my illness all the time (am really sick of that one)

9: Thinking that it’s something that I’m doing that’s making me ill, not listening to GP or endo and I can get T4 to work if I just try harder in someway.

10: Wishing that I could explain better to those around me how much I love them and what it’s like having this bloody awful disease without sounding like a wimp.

Am I alone in feeling guilty for being ill?

16 Replies

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  • You are not alone.

    I don't just feel guilty, I don't allow myself to date anyone as they deserve better.

  • Oh my goodness how to break a persons heart, I'm not crying its hay fever!! Please date as I know that you are wrong, dead wrong!!

  • I know I should... but it's so hard to convince yourself you are worth it when you are ill.

  • I understand though I am married and Hubby is doing so much for my care for years. Pre-diagnosis for hypothyroid when I was "congestive heart failure but was not", then Hashimoto's, breast cancer with recurrence. So much on him. And I had already decided if anything happened to him, I would not date or remarry. Though I don't know how I would manage at the moment. BUT It has just been too much to put upon someone else, and the good guys take more than their fair share anyway. So Justina, I understand what you are saying.

    That said, from the standpoint I am married and he absolutely does adore me, I would not want to take that from him. You see. Your life offers up to another the great happiness and peace just to know you are in it.

    And that said, I hope I never have to live out my words. I want Hubby to stay right here with me, nothing to happen to him. And I try to take on more all the time when I can.

    Marty - I could check each box. When younger and thyroid was not tested properly to prove what the cause - I called it PMS from HADES that lasted all month one way or another. Thirty years later, I looked back and realized I was kind of like dying and no one caught it. With the hypo that was really lifelong inherited HASHI's oh please, and Lupus it pushes one to the edge.

  • I honestly believe that guilt is a hypo symptom, like depression, anxiety, paranoia, etc. Low T3 affects the brain as much as - perhaps more than - other parts of the body. So, irrational feelings aren't surprising, are they.

  • do You know I've never thought of it like that but seems pretty obvious when you think about it, just another symptom!!

  • Well, the 'screaming meanie pill' (above) was wonderful, I don't often laugh out loud, but it so describes me as well.

    Thanks for making me laugh out loud, and agree with all the guilt feelings.

    Oh........a symptom, that feels a bit better already.

    Thanks

  • I can identify with a lot of those - but there is another one that seems to have crept up on me - the inability to listen to people who 'witter' followed by spontaneous speech - it just comes out, totally bypassing any brain processes at all - like "I think that might be upsetting".

  • O Marty no your not alone AND you have an absolutely BRILLIANT sense of humour

    The only way is up!!

    BIG hug

  • My goodness. Didn't think of guilt as a symptom BUT since feeling better,T3 better plus vitamins, I just realised I have stopped feeling guilty about everydamn thing. And, if I could make it up I would, but not now !!!!!

    Keep on the case Marty123. 🙂🙂x

  • I'm sorry you don't feel well, hopefully you'll feel better soon. Nasty germs live in cold damp air.

    I'm clogged up with throat cataghh most of the time, (how the hell do you sp that word! even the sp check has never heard of it. Lol) But I find a good old moan really helps, my husband knows I'm ok again when I stop complaining. :)

    I must tell you, I loved your no.1 comment, reading it out to my hubby he responded,

    "So I'm not alone then".

    x

  • Re your catarrh, this is something I too have suffered from in an extreme way for 30 years! I find taking Vogel Plantago drops is the only thing that alleviates the symptoms.

  • Yea! you can spell that ruddy tricky word, I always knew there was 2 of something in it. 😂

    Thanks, I'll look for some of those drops. x

  • Bought some, it appears that it helps Sinusitis too so that'll please my husband.

  • We are funny as human beings, I recently had a bad bout of flu and felt really ill, all I could do was sit in the armchair, although in one way it was horribly miserable being so incapacitated but on the other hand I realised how nice it was to just sit in my pyjamas completely giving up and giving my body the rest it so desired. I wish I could relax into this state when well instead of feeling I should be doing something, crazy or what.

  • No you are not. My house is like a pigsty and I cannot care less! Totally fed up with waiting to feel better and go for walks. Just waiting!!!!

    Wish I had not agreed to removal of thyroid in 2013.

    Janveron

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