Christmas Gatherings - Covid and MBC

My brother asked if I would like him to bring my Mum up to where we live for Christmas. As you probably already know from previous post I haven’t seen my 93 year old Mum for a year almost. I jumped at it. I have missed her so much and I haven’t been able to travel on public transport or drive the 290 miles in discomfort.

So, the other day I received my four page letter from the Health Service regarding shielding and Christmas. It was a big no go for my brother and nephew, who is sharing the driving to come into our apartment unless they wore masks and we had the windows open. Brrrrr.....to cold. I felt awful telling my brother this and said if he was tested for Covid it would be ok.

Since this conversation with him his area, my Mums area and my Nephews area have gone in to Tier 3. A definite NO for even Mum to visit. She doesn’t see anyone except my brother and his family and her two sisters who visited her today. If they get caught coming down the motorways from Tier 3 to our Tier 2 they could be in trouble if stopped by the Police. My Mum doesn’t understand as she says she doesn’t see anyone but she will be 4/5 hours in the car with them. Plus my Nephews wife had Covid 2 months ago and works in a school. My nephew could be a carrier and not know it.

Just don’t know what to do. My Oncologist is calling with my CT scan results tomorrow and I feel the weight on my shoulders right now.

What do you think ladies? A picture to make you smile. I didn’t take it.

[Pachira]

What a difficult choice, I’m so sorry. That’s a long journey for your Mum especially in the winter. Are you able to talk to her on Face Time or Zoom? I guess you’re in the UK so I don’t understand the repercussions of traveling but I don’t believe in the testing. Even Elon Musk had 4 tests. 2 were positive , 2 were negative so I would be afraid to rely on them. Our immune system needs to be strong and if it is I believe with what they know now about treatment, the survival rate is good. Even so would it be worth the risk for dinner? A terrible dilemma but I’m sure you’ll make the right decision. God bless!

[Mindysooty]

Very difficult dilemma. Everyone is navigating their way through and balancing their own personal situations to find the best way forward for them. Our situation is slightly different as we are having our severely autistic daughter home which i didnt think would be possible. We cant mix with anyone else, just her with me and hubby, we have to have the new fast track covid tests before she comes, and we mega sheild anyway because of me and also of course the care home she is at follow every guideline to the dot. For us, we feel we are taking every precaution to balance the joy of being able to have her home. I miss her so much, shes coped well but she doesnt really fully understand bless her and will say on facetime, 'coronavirus finished on?' Thats her way of saying when can i come home, bless her. Defo not an easy choice but I'm sure you and your family will come to whatever is the right decision for you all. Best wishes x

[Mary115 in reply to Mindysooty]

Oh Mindysooty What a loving image of you and your daughter. I love how you can translate her words so well. She "Will say on facetime, 'coronavirus finished on?' Thats her way of saying when can i come home, bless her." I too have a family member with whom I can translate her hovering as well as her words. How this coronavirus has made it difficult for our loved ones and we who love them. May all of us be connected beyond neurological challenges and covid challenges too. Even in cyber space.

[Mindysooty in reply to Mary115]

Thats so nice of you to say, thank you. X

[Mindysooty]

Ps i love that picture, it's adorable 💕 x

[Mary115]

FlowerfairiesThere are those times that we will feel the emotional responses of whatever decision we make. In those cases, I judge myself harshly for making a decision that felt sad or bad afterwards. The truth of the matter is that I need not judge myself for there really wasn't a really really good choice which I could have made. Both choices were problematic.

In some situations, in making the decision, I need to go with whatever decision is thought to be the most safe.

I am not sure if the safety first idea is the one for you right, now, but sadly for me I cannot take risks for my own health and for those who would have to take care of me if i get sick..

These are hard times, and I feel for us .. together in our concern for each on other on the forum.

[Julie2233]

Just to say that for the Christmas relaxation you are allowed to form a bubble of up to 3 households and you are allowed to travel between tiers. So no worries about being stopped on the motorway. But it is still a personal decision about the amount of risk you are prepared to take and subject others to.

[Amm1]

It’s so difficult to know what to do and who to see over Christmas. Decide what’s right for you and go with your gut. Xx

[Buffwright]

I live in California and though I usually drive the 14 hours to visit my daughter and grandson in Portland OR, I decided to fly on Nov. 19, with mask and shield. Though my daughter and her husband isolated me for 9 days after I drove after Leo was born in May, they didn’t this time and we all lived to tell the tale. But My son in law ‘s grandmother died of COVID a week after I arrived and his mother and her partner now have it. So, you just never know! I’m so lucky that I’ve been lucky! Thank goodness for zoom and Facebook video chat!

[jersey-jazz]

Dear Flower FairyNot that you asked me for advice but I feel the need to give it to you. You must know in your rational mind whether having your mother with you is safe or not, for her, for you and for your brother. If you truly feel that it is enough of. safe bubble to have this happen, you may feel that the risks are worth it. If you do, then please go ahead and do it. Life is so short and our disease has shortened and sharpened it.

Whatever you decide, will be a champion decision coming from a champion. I call you this because of your outpouring of beauty and love to the rest of us.

Frances

[8576]

It is so awful that we have to make these decisions in a situation like yours. Who knows what the right thing is. I guess they would all be staying overnight. I think I would wait until the vaccines are available. Hopefully not too long. Hope this helps you make your decision. Love your charming picture. Thanks.

Cheers, June S.

[mariootsi]

Good luck with your scan results.As difficult as this Christmas will be, I suggest we are better off staying separate to protect ourselves and others!I will be doing a zoom call with my daughter and son- in - law.

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Thank you everyone for your replies. You are so helpful and kind in your response. I have taken everything on board and will consider everything.Best wishes to you all.