It was my GP who has diagnosed me with bipolar and said she was convinced that I had it. I had not mentioned the previous diagnosis by the psychiatrist. I asked her quite pointedly how she had come to that conclusion. Her answer somewhat surprised me, as her explanation was far more graphic and so much easier for me to understand than the way the psychiatrist had explained it to me in the first instance, and it totally registered with me making complete and utter sense.
She said she had picked up on it during our consultations and it had become somewhat quite obvious to her, by my communication skills, the changing in my moods, the reasons I gave for my mood changes, and the tone of my voice when explaining certain significant issues.
Since being diagnosed by her, (as one must be able to imagine), I have been doing a lot of research on bipolar. I came across an extremely interesting article which struck me as being quiet pertinent to my personal experience.
The article quoted 'that if you have bipolar disorder, you were likely to be born with the predisposition for this disorder, and for many, a 'traumatic experience' or stressful life event and/or upbringing can trigger the onset of the illness
So .... traumatic experience? I am inclined to believe so.
I wonder if the following would count as a traumatic experience.
2 years ago I broke my pelvis and I was confined to my bed for 2½-3 mths, which then unfortunately became 6 mths and then it progressed to12 mths. I was diagnosed with major depression, but unfortunately that didn't make a lot of sense to me. I was in explicitly at a loss as to why I wasn't capable of getting out of bed. Everything seemed to be too overwhelming.
Eventually my adult daughter arrived for a surprise visit, and on witnessing the 'inexcusable' way that I was living my life, had a knee jerk reaction.
FYI .... I had gifted to her $50,000 to help purchase the unit that I was living in. (I may as well help pay off her mortgage than a stranger's). That was my way of thinking anyway. It actually made perfect sense to me at the time.
And within 5 hours of her arrival, the following catastrophic events altered/destroyed my life as I knew it.
Her knee jerk reaction resulted in me being kicked out of my home, with all of my furniture just given away, my precious car (of 22 years) was taken away and I was informed that it was going to be sold, my precious, wonderful and beautiful pet cat of 8 glorious, fun, laughter and loved filled years, was tortured by my nephew for 4 days and then put down. I had lost my home, my car, my cat, my independence and my freedom ... all in a matter of 5 hours.
I was then committed to a dementia clinic for 2 months. Can you imagine what it was like to be a sane person (albeit suffering from major depression but definitely not dementia) to be locked up in a crazy place with 36 dementia patients. (I was Jack Nicholson in 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest'). My phone was also confiscated. BTW .... not one member of my family contacted me the entire time that I was in this god-awful place.
You see .... I had major depression. Totally unacceptable. ('Wake up to yourself and just get over it'). I honestly believe they would've been happier if I were to have cancer.
For the first 3 weeks I was totally inconsolable. I was completely overcome with the most unbearable grief .... for everything that I had lost, but most of all, for not just loosing my Joe, my cat, but in the dreadful way in which it happened. I can honestly report, that I have never been so miserable in my entire life before. I actually wanted to end it.
I do sincerely apologise to those of you who are reading this post, and believe that it does not belong in the restless leg section of HU, and that it actually belongs in the section for bipolar. To be quite honest I wasn't exactly sure, so I am going to post it in the bipolar section as well.
In one of my last posts, I believe I asked a question from those of you who are suffering from both restless legs and bipolar, what medication you are currently taking and are they successful and do they have an adverse reaction on your RLS. I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to read this unfortunately very long post.
A couple of nights ago one of my knees collapsed and I had a very serious fall. I went down like a sack of potatoes and landed on my backside.
I am 100% sure that I have once again broken my pelvis, as the pain has now moved down to the left side of my groin, which was the telling point for my previous doctor that I had seen the time before. I cannot see the point of X-rays as nothing can be done for a broken pelvis unless it has been smashed as in a car accident so what's the point. Another 2½ - 3 mths bed rest coming up but I am older and much more wiser this time around, so hopefully things will be much different this time round.