I have been struggling in my relationship when I’m triggered. It doesn’t help that we both have almost the same severity of trauma and mental illnesses but I have been seeking support and treatment for years while my partner does it all alone/pretending it’s not there. But when he is triggered and sets me off you cannot even tell how much work I’ve put in. I get triggered, baited, hooked and I am saying things I don’t want to say and being all the way outside of character. It doesn’t seem to matter how far I get-meditating, exercising, eating healthy, religion, working in mental health field and all the extra things I have invested into being my best self…I can guard myself against it with love and empathy for days or weeks at a time but then as if he is miserable and does not like seeing me content and stable he will start picking and picking. Then blame me and accuse me of starting it all! I think he believes this too! I want to keep working towards becoming my best self before walking away and maybe suffering for it. But during this process I keep being dragged back down. I know there is a good chance that he doesn’t realize how offensive he is. He probably really believes he is the victim. But shouldn’t I be able to forgive and overlook this since I know he is probably triggered? See, I have to guess when he is because he is not open and honest about his triggers so this makes it difficult as well.
Anyone understand what this is and/or have some support or advice for my relationship situation? Thank you all for listening. This is actually why I joined this platform today but it looks like I’m going to love it!❤️
