Been up since 2a.m. Nothing unusual about that, my nighttimes are not night anymore. I wake up thinking about Mum. She has had PSP for about 8 years
I want to blog but I can't as the tears just keep falling. I want to answer questions and share but I can't as I am afraid. I am having to leave my work as I can't cope anymore. I have two sons still at home and I am at Mums more and more. I hide my deppression from everyone. I lie when anyone asks if I am ok. I am a Mum, a wife, a person who had a professional career that was my vocation and love. I am a daughter whose Mum is disapearing before my eyes. A Mum who was a Head of Domestic science and a Needlework Teacher who cooked for hundreds and would whip up a dress in a couple of hours..who did the Telegragh crossword in 15 minutes and do hundreds of other things. Now she sits and can't do anything and I put everything in place for her. Last night I said 'Mum bet you dread me coming don't you as I seem to be constantly telling you off' she said 'No my love I don't know what I would do without you'
I hate PSP and all that it does to our loved ones. I can't blog about her illness, it hurts too much....I will get stronger myself I think, I am just having a self pity party time. Thank you all for being there for me to read every day and know I am not alone. Thank you PSPA for all the help you have given me.xx