I appreciate all of you so very much. The support of this forum over the years has been beyond anything that I ever expected ... deep gratitude for all of you.
I sit bedside tonight as I write to you. Swallowing is extremely low, and we are managing ice chips, yogurt, applesauce, pureed fruits / vegetables, but not much. One day this week, it took hours to get down a small yogurt --- I just do not know how long her body can do this. Her weight loss is significant -- her breathing is shallow -- I keep checking her oxygen, and it sits around 93 ... sigh.
She is sleeping alot. Not alot of elimination -- I had to do a suppository, and expect to have to do it again -- her bowels just are not moving much. She is becoming weaker by the day.
We celebrated her 76th birthday on November 14th, and I offered a Birthday Open House for 3 hours -- allowing family and friends to come by and wish her a birthday wish in person. I truly believe that she enjoyed seeing all the familiar faces. I am grateful for those that stopped by.
Thank you all for the continued support and love.
Kim & Marlene (Momma)
Written by
bazooka111
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Thank you Jen! Happy Birthday to you! She is my Queen, and so very easy to love. She received so many flower deliveries -- our home is full and beautiful arrangements everywhere. xo Kim
Happy Birthday. Your daughters posts have touched our lives as these have given us a glimpse of you and your life. You are a special women and dearly loved by your family, but also loved by those of us all over the world that have gotten to know you here on this forum.
I can feel the sadness in you but try and not be sad . Your mum was loved and cared for and many of people don’t get that …… enjoy and treasure these days as you can look back on them with pride because you did all you could possibly do to make her comfortable and peaceful. Sending you both lots of love and hugs
Dearest Kim. As always you and your darling momma Marlene are in my prayers. I’m sure she loved being able to see/hear all her friends & family. It’s heartbreaking to know she is going to leave you but she knows how much you all love her and will be at peace. May she be pain free and peaceful until the end. As you know, my darling indicated no more food through his PEG and drifted off very peacefully after 10 days. I just sprayed his mouth and cleaned gently. No suppositories as no waste. Does Momma want food if it takes so much effort for both of you? You have been an amazing daughter & carer Kim and Marlene knows you have done all you can to make her last few years as good as possible. May you all know that special peace that surpasses all understanding.
This is my dilemma NannaB .. I don’t know what to do. Our communication is raise a hand up for yes, and I haven’t asked every time, but I have asked if she wants to try and eat … massive sigh … it’s hard for me not to give her food…. Or at least try … I don’t know what to do here. Praying for wisdom. Xo I appreciate you - Kim
I know it is Kim. But you do have the strength, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the moment. Keep doing the things you are and hold your Mum as tight as you dare.
Sending you love and happy birthday to your mom. Keep on you're doing your mom proud. It is so hard to watch the decline. Wishing you both love and support on the journey ❤
Sending you both lots of love and hugs. Your mom will be so proud of how well you have cared for her, this part is the hardest of all as it is a constant dilemma of what is best to do. You just have to do what feels right and know that you are doing your absolute best. The main thing now is to give lots of love and keep talking because even if your mom can’t communicate very well with you she will feel comforted to hear your voice, talk about all the wonderful things you have done with her, like that cruise you took her on, I was so impressed with that. You have done an amazing job of caring for her and you are still doing an amazing job. Love and hugs to you both love Sarahxxx
Happy birthday Marlene! Beautiful autumn flowers for a beautiful lady. I'm sure the open house was such a highlight for her, those friends and family who can see her beyond the CBD and talk to her as she was before robbed of speech. At least this is what my Mum said (also vintage 1946!) at my daughter's Confirmation earlier this year when she loved seeing family and friends. Love and prayers, Fiona x
Happy Birthday to your dear Momma, she looks happy and comfortable laying there surrounded by love, it’s what we all hope as we near the end of our lives. Xx
Thank you for the beautiful picture of your Mom! Happy Birthday! Your Mom looks warm and cozy! Your wonderful care shines through! I feel the same way you do. I don’t know what to do or how to help. I have been reading about hospice care and trying to understand how the body prepares for journeys end. Barbara Karnes has a lot of helpful information. Love and birthday hugs for you and your mom. Love, Linda
Big hug for you Kim and a gentle one to momma !As always you are making wonderful memories to comfort you. It's such an overwhelming roller coaster so desperately wanting to get it right. I focussed on trying to do whatever gave Chris comfort. It's all any of us know.
I also remember the value of this community supporting me !!
I am beyond words with all of you on this form -- deepest of gratitude. Tonight I sit bedside with Momma ... no food for two days now, and she had ice chips today, but that is all. My heart has broken watching her quietly slow down. --- Kim
Oh That sweet face and a hint of a smile. 🥰 The chair your Momma is in looks very comfy -what type of chair is it? Hopefully at this point you have hospice on board to help you with the details of caring for you Momma. Based on my experience and advise from Hospice when I cared for other family members-As the journey progress the body has less need for nourishment, give yourself the grace to accept that, if possible, and only do what is necessary for her comfort. Less food, less waste-less issues with toileting. Oral care is very comforting-there are foam swabs to dip in water to keep her mouth comfortable and provide some hydration. A little mist of water or a wet wash cloth she can suck on , and moisturizer for her lips is helpful. It is so very hard to let go-but you are doing all the right things , most importantly loving her. You are amazing and I am grateful for all your input on this sight. Stay with us as your caregiving continues, always steadfast and lovingly. Prayers and BIG HUG!!!!
It truly was a beautiful afternoon, celebrating her -- the chair is called a "Broda" chair -- that is the name brand -- It is such a great chair, and has kept her safe and from leaning -- snug. Sh is so very small -- no more food, and just ice chips the last couple of days. I am sitting bedside with her as I write this -- my heart is broken. Hugs received --- love - Kim
Happy Birthday to your beautiful momma! 🌹🌷 You are such a wonderful daughter. I know it's so very hard to see your mum like this. My mum is also going through the same thing she is 63. You are truly doing an amazing job with your mum. Our main focus now is to keep making our mums happy and smiling. Our mums our precious to us. We have to keep strong. Lots of prayers, hugs and love to you and your mum. 🌻
What a lovely and thoughtful birthday you gave your momma.
I can feel your pain, it is so very hard to see our loved ones fading in front of us. You are an incredible loving daughter who has created so many wonderful eco and memories.No one knows your Momma like you do and your instinct and love will guide you in these challenging times.
I am thinking of you both and sending a big hug and lots of love
Happy birthday Marlene! Kim, you are doing such a great job. I love that you had everyone in to see your Mom for her birthday. You will always remember this birthday.
You are doing such a great job. It is a lovely picture of your mother and it definitely looks that she is fully aware of everything going on and what a wonderful daughter she has!
Kim thinking about you brings back lots of memories, you have been an amazing daughter, happy birthday to your beautiful momma, big hugs to you both xxxx
Thinking of you and your Momma. Your posts have always touched my heart, the bond between you is so strong and beautiful, that is so clear to read and see. Take care.
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Update on how well my mum is doing since leaving hospital 7 weeks ago 😁
My beautiful Nana is no longer suffering 
