Please Advise- will not sit on the toilet

Please help. Joe is in his 5th year of CBD.

Left side weak. Can't use both hands except to hold spoon to still feed himself.

I got sciatica attack 3 weeks ago and we have 24 hour care. He refuses to st on the toilet and will not have a bowel movement for days at a time. I am using laxative sparingly. We have the chair that sits over the bowl. He gets very agitated. He also spits, curses and hits whoever is helping him. This is not who he is. I have not posted in a long time. I live in fear and I am trying to heal. Joe gives us all a hard time about drinking any fluids.

Thanks,

Rita

[honjen43]

Hi Rita, that must be so frustrating!

Could the the seated position uncomfortable for some reason? Or is he finding it difficult to use those muscles? Or cold seat - tho probably not at present as I understand you have a heatwave! Or just because he can object and make a fuss, he does?! There could be a confused reason behind it all!

PSP & CBD do seem to change behaviour and drive us crazy. Is he likely to accept a bribe? Such as chocolate or a favourite food. Behaviour seems childish so maybe such response might work!

My husband had no such trouble and continued to be fastidious about getting to the toilet. As his mind began to fail, he still seemed to think that was where he was when accidents occurred.

Not fun for you or the carers meantime.

I know how exhausting and painful sciatica can be. Was struck down by it last year and I found there was no quick recovery other than rest.

Hang in there and get all the help you can from the doctors! Maybe a calming pill!

Hope you feel better soon and that Joe's toilet attitude modifies!

Hugs

Jen xxx

[raincitygirl in reply to honjen43]

So Jen, your chocolate bribe was brilliant! I'd never in a hundred years have thought of that 👍

[honjen43 in reply to raincitygirl]

Oh Anne! So delighted. LOL.

[Kevin_1]

Hi Rita

Is he able to say why he doesn't want to sit on the toilet?

Or, it could be a CBD thing - of course.

It might be time to get a doctor in to see if there might be some medication to settle him a little.

Sciatica and moving and handling are not good bedfellows. Do please be careful, pressure on your spine could permanently worsen your sciatica.

It's sounds especially difficult for you both right now.

Wishing you both the best and that things improve soon.

Warmly

Kevin

[DenB]

Hi Rita, did Joe do all these things before you had people in to help him? It could be that he doesn't like anyone else helping him onto the toilet.I'm sure he isn't holding back on purpose. He could be constipated and it is a bit uncomfortable to pass anything, so he really doesn't want to go into the toilet and be forced to try and go.

I would give some Movicol just to ease it along.

Denise x

[Dadshelper]

It could be that it's time to stop using the toilet. Dad got to the point where he couldn't sit on a toilet and all bowel movements were dealt with in bed, like in a hospital. Adult diapers and bed pads plus plenty of wipes. While he was at home he used a catheter for urinating but the nursing home prefers not to use that due to infection risks. Unfortunately with these diseases nothing stays constant as they progress.

Ron

[raincitygirl]

Hi Rita,

My hubby took stool softeners and Metamucil, drank water and I ensured fruit and vegs daily in his diet. Constipation is so common w CBD/PSP

Members here often say a change in temperament signals a UTI- has that been checked out?

Also wondering with his decreasing dexterity, is it possible he isn't able to clean himself and is embarrassed, fearful of "going"?

So hard to know whats going on when so many things changing at once. Would he be able to talk to his doctor (with you present, of course)? Maybe its time for him to be checked out to help point you toward the best solution.

Please let us know what happens next..Wish I could be more help. XXX

Anne G.

[Hidden]

Thanks friends for your input. I tried bribery. It is working! God Bless!

[Ratcliffe]

I am so glad to hear that the bribery is working.

I think it could be something as simple as him being embarrassed about having to sit on a commode chair in the lounge or wherever it is instead of the main toilet. One of the conversations I had with David was about that and he admitted to being a bit embarrassed, and also concerned for me, as to the fact that I was having to get him on it, and wipe him etc, as he knew it made me heave in the early times.

We solved that one by me having packs of those latex or nitrile gloves everywhere and rolls of loo roll, so I could quickly Glove up, and help him wherever he was if he didn’t make the bathroom.

In the end, everything combine made him a bit less self conscious, so maybe there is something in that.

However, long may the chocolate bribe work 😀😀😀😀😀