It's been 11 days now since J went onto morphine and last had anything to eat or drink. He's at home, where he wanted to be, and being kept comfortable, but the waiting is terrible. In the beginning we were happy that we had some time with him to say goodbye. His son flew back from the US, and had a few days with him when he was still responsive. But that was 6 days ago, and now it's just really hard to watch. He is unbelievably thin, and his body is starting to break down. I had a sense of peace and serenity in the beginning that his struggle was nearly over and that we were abiding by his wishes. But that peace has evaporated under the stress of the last few days. I'm sure that the lack of sleep is contributing to the turmoil in my head and heart.
Every day the doctor is amazed that he is still with us. We've all told him that he can go and rest, and yet he just hangs in there. What an unbelievably strong man.
I wonder how much longer he can last, and how much longer I can keep watching and waiting. Has anyone else endured this kind of time? Please send us strength and peace for J.