My lovely husband died at 21.25 on Monday, 29 August.

It was all very sudden. When I arrived at the nursing home in the morning Michael was struggling to breathe. He did seem to improve a bit and we spent the morning enjoying the sunshine in the garden with our Chorkie, Tilly. Michael had his lunch outside too although he didn't really eat anything. When I left I had a feeling that something was going to happen and in the evening I had a call from the nurse to say that Michael's condition had worsened and did I want her to call the ooh dr - I said yes, although there was a dnr in place. I immediately called my daughter who was on her way back with her family from a seaside break and some way away. During the call another call came through and M' s condition had worsened very rapidly and I needed to get there asap. I tried to get a taxi but there was none available - called on a neighbour to ask if she knew of any other taxis and sh got her daughter and daughter in law to run me to the home. Another kind neighbour took in our little dog for the night. Amazing how kind people are when there is a crisis - I will be eternally grateful.

Unfortunately I was too late and Michael couldn't wait. My daughter arrived just a little while later and we stayed for quie some time to say our goodbyes and wait for the undertaker.

Nobody expected M to leave us so quickly. I miss him so terribly. He had only been diagnosed with the dreaded PSP in 2012 - previously Parkinson's. PSP is really bloody horrible!

Love to you all


44 Replies

  • Dear Chris

    My sincerest condolences to you all, you must be in terrible shock right now?!!! Michael will now be at peace from this awful awful illness. This I find is always soooo hard to respond to such a sad, sad post but I'm sending you all my love and strength x

  • Ps meant to say one day this will be me, writing, 😢

    Heartbreaking x

  • I know I know! Me, us too!


  • Dear Chris - so sorry for your loss - it's such a slow slow disease and then it went so quickly. Sending you a warm big hug, words fail me right now,

    Lieve xx

  • Chris I'm so sorry, I really feel for you as I'm sure everyone on this forum will do too.

    It's something we will all have to face one day I suppose, although I try not to think about it too often, (impossible I know)

    I agree that people can be so kind when you need help, where would we be without human kindness?

    I'm thinking of you tonight and all your family, it's so so hard....

    Love....Pat xx

  • Dear Chris, my sincere condolences to you and your family on the passing of your lovely husband. You are right PSP is horrible, robbing us of our loved ones, but I hope and pray that in time, the memories of the happy times you shared together will replace the sad times. May you find comfort knowing your lovely husband is now at peace and PSP no longer has a hold over him and I pray you will find strength for the days that lie ahead.

    Love to you and your family,

    Nanny857 xx

  • My deepest condolences to you and your family.


  • Chris thinking of you all at this very sad time, Michael is in a better place away from this horrible illness, sending you a big hug Yvonne xxxx

  • Chris

    My deepest condolences to you and your family. This disease is just awful! There are no words that I can write that will make you feel better, but know that all of us are here for you and that you are in our thoughts and prayers. My husband Les passed 3.5 weeks ago and whenever I log on to this site and write something, it just helps me feel at peace. They are no longer suffering with this terrible, horrific disease. It is strange because we know they were sick and suffering, but we miss everything about them so much. Heartbroken.

    Peace be with you Chris.



  • Dear Chris , so sorry for your loss. How is it that it seems like an eternity that your love has this disease but all too soon they are gone? There is a kindness to people isn't there? I'm glad you had soemone to help you when you really needed it! I will leave you with words from the Bible, that I hope will comfort you...


    In the day when I cried thou answered me, and strengthened me with strength in my soul. Psalm 138:3

    But the God of all grace, who has called us unto his eternal glory by

    Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, establish, strengthen and settle you.

    I Peter 5:10

  • So sad to learn if your loss.

    Abirke offered comforting scriptures that remind me of that greater power who now restores your precious Michael.

    God Bless....

  • So sorry for your loss but at peace now.

    Take care x

  • Chris, I'm so sorry Michael has left you and your family. May. You find peace knowing you are now all free from PSP and he is no longer suffering with this awful condition.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you at this very sad time.

    Sending you a big hug.


  • I am very sorry to read your post. I hope that, in time, the happy memories of the years you had together will cause the PSP ones to fade. May peace be with you and your family.

  • So sorry for your loss.

  • I am so sorry for the loss of your dear husband, my thoughts are with you and your family xx

  • Goodnight Michael, and Chris may your family keep you strong.

    Time will heal and hopefully bring back the good memories of days before PSP. xx

  • So sorry to hear of your loss. What a contrast you paint of the morning out in the sunshine and the night calls and panic. I hope in time the sunny morning will win out in your memory.

  • Sending you massive loving hugs to wrap around you and your family at this time. There are no words and no way is a good way to go but his day to leave the earth was not full of suffering may in time be a blessing to you.

    Look after yourself xxx

  • So sorry for your loss. Condolences to you and all your family. Remember the lovely morning and wrap yourself round in that memory. Love Pauline xx

  • Thats v sad to hear.So sorry for your loss.Much love xx

  • Dear Chris,

    I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, my deepest condolences to you and your family..

    May God hold your hold thru this difficult time and help you cope with ur loss.

    Sending you a big hug



  • Words fail at times like these Chris.. So saddened over your loss.. May the happy memories of times together withbMichseo sustain you and strengthen you as you come to terms with this heartbreaking parting.. Thoughts and prayers with you and your daughter xxxx

  • sorry for your loss Chris thoughts are with you and your family at this sad time xx

  • So sorry for your loss. It really is a horrible illness.x

  • Sorry for the loss of your dear husband, I hope he managed to enjoy the time sat together with the sunshine beaming down on him before he left you and this horrible disease, Hope you have lots of lovely memories to help you through this sad time.

  • :( so very sorry to hear of your husbands passing our preys to you and your family.

  • So sad that you were not able to be with him.

    Hope all the good memories will comfort you.

    Love and a big hug, from Jean x

  • I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My deepest condolences to you and your family. So glad you found this site and hopefully feel all the hugs and love we are sending you. God bless.

    Gracie girl ((((hugs))))

  • So very sorry for your loss, I know how you feel because I lost my wife unexpectedly a year ago - the only consolation, to me, is that she didn't have to suffer anymore but like you I still miss her very much.

  • So very sorry for your loss Chris ):

  • Chris, sending you much love and prayers during this difficult time. Do not feel sad you were not there at the very end. Often loved ones seem to "wait" until family is not present as if to spare you the pain. He gave you the gift of the time together in the sunny Fternoon. That is how he wanted it. So reassure that memory and reflect on all the good times in the coming weeks. Be kind to yourself and allow others to aid and console you. He is at peace now at free of this awful disease. Please take care of yourself.

    Hugs, JGC

  • I am so sorry and blessings for you, your daughter and that kind neighbor. I"m looking down the same path, as all of us here are, and my stomach and heart ache.

    More soon, but in the meantime, I'll be thinking about you and keeping you wrapped in prayers.


  • My thoughts are with you xx

  • Craines, I am sorry for your loss. I lost my husband 2 months ago tomorrow. It is so veerrryyyy (very) hard at first. I am glad that he is not in anymore pain, but I miss him so much. We were married 39 years. I still have days that I just get down and have to have a quiet time. The best thing I can say to help is to spend time with your kids and grandkids now, so that your days and nights are not spent crying a lot. You might take a short trip now to stay busy. This has helped me tremendously. Lots of love and prayers for the coming days. Deb

  • So sorry to hear your news. My condolences to you and your family. M is in a better place now and it is time for you to be kind yourself after all the strains and stresses of PSP. Sending a big hug.X

  • Sending my condolences, thinking of you x

  • So sorry to hear your loss. PSP is awful for everyone concerned. Atleast there is no more PSP to face anymore. Your husband is rid of it and at peace. The suddeness makes it hard to deal with I'm sure, eventhough we all know what PSP means. I nope time heals your pain for you and your daughter.

  • Dear Chris, I am so very sorry about your husband Michael, so hard emotionally for you and your family now time does heal but the pain in your heart will be there, just know that he is at peace now with no more suffering. Will be thinking of you. Nettie

  • Dear Chris, sorry to hear of your sad news but be assured that he is in a better place now free from this awful disease. Your family.will help you through this difficult time, take your time to come to terms with all that has gone before and the future. I'm sure you will end up thinking of the good times and let's hope the PSP memories will fade. Take care and I'm sure you must feel the support from this wonderful group of people on this site.

    Love Kate xxxx

  • Dear Chris,

    I am so sorry for your loss. You have been a wonderful wife and support for Micheal. How nice that you were able to spend time outdoors with him and the pet. He must have felt content and secure enough to let go of this earthly struggle. For you this will take a while to find yourself. We are so caught up in caring for our spouse and seeing that they get everything they need that we sometimes forget about ourselves. Take time to grieve and know that we are here if you need to talk. Prayers for peace and comfort.

  • I felt so sad to read about the passing of your lovely husband. How you will miss him but think of past good times and the fact that he suffers no more. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers tonight. I send a huge hug across the ocean from the USA.

  • My deepest heart felt sympathy to you and your family. PSP is truly awful.

  • so sorry for you loss, you'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

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