Standing Aids

Yesterday the big chief standing aid ,handling advisor for Devon came to our house to train me and our OT on how to use the recently delivered all singing all dancing stand aid . It is a state of the art machine with more attachments than the international space station . Anyway this lady bounded in with huge enthusiasm and political correctness to demonstrate the virtues of the said machine . I tentatively suggested she might like to see V's standing or lack of standing ability but she brushed me aside and proceeded to extol the machine's virtues and produced a bewildering array of straps and slings which she demonstrated on herself . She swung from the machine , showed us how we could toilet V ( seemed impossible to me ) and rattled on for nearly an hour and a half - finally I said again perhaps we should try it on V who had gone sound asleep by this time and she agreed we should . Duly belted in a new crossover type thingy we raised V whose bosom then began to rise with the belt and would have put Dolly Parton in the shade . "Stop " our good lady shouted " that's no good she can't weight bear " "Told you that an hour and a half ago "I muttered . "This machine is no use to her ,we need need a ceiling hoist " and with that she departed clutching her bondage equipment and leaving us somewhat bemused .

By the way I contacted Th e Hub where I am told the CHC nurses reside to find out what is happening about V's new assessment . I was told to ask which nurse has been allocated to her . "No one yet "was the reply - so I asked when the assessment was going to happen - they didn't know and if I wasn't contacted within two weeks or so the to phone back . I asked to speak to whoever was in charge but the person I spoke to said she was new there so couldn't tell me .....and so it goes on .

26 Replies

oldest β€’ newest
  • Sorry Georgepa but your post made me lol

    I know it shouldn't and you must have been going quietly insane with this woman her contraption!! Why these people don't listen I don't know!! How stupid of her!!

    We had a similar situation when a HUGE WHEELCHAIR was delivered here, so complex it was ridiculous!! It's now been returned as dad is now bed bound and no longer wants to be hoisted into any chair!!

    As for chc complain!! Speak to Kevin that wonder chap may be able to help you?

    Lots of love X

  • George thanks for the Dolly Parton vision, similar experience with M but with a ceiling hoist sling, OT apologised and got the standard sling she could not stop laughing with M.

    On CHC if you have it do not push for reassessment if you need CHC start daily calls and contact your GP and local gov social services if still nothing in a week to get their support.

    Best wishes Tim

  • Is the e-hub orbiting earth as well ;)

    I'm amased at your patience!

    Beautifully written post - made me chuckle a lot.

    Good luck


  • I love all theese people that just think they know best and are unable to listen. We had a very efficient ot lady...... (not) she was almost purple in the face telling me that i had got the bed stick in the wrong place. The long and short of it was she put where she wanted it to be...... i sniggers as she said you try it now Brian it will be so much better there. Oh yes he tried it and yes his feet were hanging off the end of the bed and as he was unable to move himself up the bed (no amount of coaxing or instructions from her resulted in a wriggle or slide up the bed.

    I put it back where we had it and yes he was able to get high enough up the bed to have his feet on the mattress and his head on the pillows so off she went with a flea in her ear. Janexx

  • a flea in the ear....hahahahaaha

  • Brilliant!


  • Why is everyone New or at lunch ?...I don't even get to eat lunch...and I;m at my house!!! and New...I have aged 30 years in the last three! Felt like this is all I been doing ...forever....

    And I know I'm not a UKer, but why do you have to be Assessed yet again?

    Poor Georgpa and V.....I'm so sorry


    This is my mean side talkin' but,,,,

    I don't suppose you created a Youtube show of her long winded presentation demonstrating the qualities and down right humor of this many-strapped contraption, eh?...I'm gonna have to do penance for that one....

    Quite frankly I would like Bruce to have something that would hold torso in secure position while he walks...but he can still walk.

  • It's does seem like all our UK friends are constantly being subjected to assessments. And A, such s thing does exist but it wiil set you back about 4 grand- kid you not. It is a sit to stand harness/ walker with high arm pads. It was recommended by a occupational therapist. "It's a bit pricey, though, ", she said. A BIT, you think?!!!

  • Apparently we are going to have a ceiling hoist- I have visions of a giant crane in our front room with me climbing a long ladder to sit in the cab and hoist and swing V around the room as if we were on a building site . Perhaps that's just wishful thinking .

  • I want one too. I've always fancied working a crane.

    I could keep him suspended and say I'll only let you down when you speak !

    That wouldn't work. He'd rather die than give in .

    But I could swing him around a bit. And the grandchildren would love it.

    love, Jean x

  • how about bumping up and down or even just raising then going out for the day - I am getting quite excited at the prospect ; the possibilities are endless !!!!

  • What power !!

    We could have competitions !!

  • Hey, this sounds great. I have always dreaded the hoists coming, but yes, the thought of being able to keep him swinging, until he is nice to me, well....... Are they electric, 'cause I'll have to remember to make sure I have put a shilling in the meter!!!

    Lots of love


  • Shilling ? - that's a give away!

  • My great grandmother told me about them!!!

    Lots of love


  • Pink flying pigies come to mind !

  • Somebody can buy his own lunch soon!!!

  • George you always make me laugh, can't believe you are still waiting for chc it is ridiculous xxxx

  • How do you make a stressful situation so funny. Could do with you around a lot. Made me laugh out loud on the train home from work x

  • Georgepa you must have the patients of a saint, and hope you get CHC soon

    Debbie xx

  • Wish I'd been there !! Made me laugh to picture it.

    Its a crazy world, so much money wasted, makes me cry !

    love, Jean x

  • Dear Georgepa, you have such a lovely way with words. I shouldn't have laughed at V's experience, sorry.

    What a terrible ordeal you are having with CHC. if you've the time ring everyday. Good luck

    Nanny857 x

  • Of course you should laugh - laughter is the best medicine and if we didn't laugh we would be crying wouldn't we .

  • Yup.

  • Hello, we had a standing hoist quite early with Ian's CBD, and found it a lifesaver, my favourite bit of kit! But about 9 month ago he started to severely flop to one side and on several occasions his legs gave way totally, and it is so stressful trying to keep the blessed thing upright and Ian off the floor, we now have a H track ceiling hoist with insitue slings, so when I move him to his chair from the bed and vice versa the sling is in place, this is handy if you want to move them and no carers are due, as it can be done on your own, the downside is the dressing etc on the bed and rolling to put on or remove items, but much less stressful, I have just had a set of sliding sheets too, so if he moves down the bed, they just slide up, very very useful.

    My OT has ordered a chair, waiting for this to come, but it looks fabulous, with built in air cushion and adjustable sides so wedges can be inserted if the head drops.

    Good luck with it all I am so grateful for this site, it is my daily fix


  • Sounds very much like the thingy we have coming our way . Think I am going to find dressing V difficult but hey ho all the fun of the fair .

You may also like...