Well, after a lot of phone calls, an assessment on S, the care home have agreed that they will accept him!!!
Not sure that I am happy, still very hurt and upset by the managers comments, but I DO need respite now! it is only for a week. The place is lovely, views right across the Bristol Channel, can even see the sea from his room! CHC are going to give me addresses of other homes, but at the moment, I know I haven't the energy or strength to go looking. So have agreed a date in just over a weeks time. If it doesn't work out, I will look at another place, for next time. The main thing at present, is to get S into a reasonable place, so I can take a breather! If I leave it any longer, there will not be a choice. I know that, I think S does as well. Not that he is saying much, except the thumbs up in agreement!
I am so cross with myself, for letting this happen. I have tried to be as positive as possible, but perhaps too positive! Thinking I had everything under control. That's the biggest laugh of all, PSP does not allow for any of that nonsense!
Please, please, all of you, look in the mirror and ask that question, that none of us want to ask. "AM I OK?" If it says yes, throw a brick into it a buy a new one! We all need a break at some stage. Although I don't feel like this, I know it's not a failure on my part, I'm just so, so exhausted.
Lots of love