I would like to explain that I have anxiety issues and now this is made worse by a Tenant I accepted in June on the advice of the Estate Agent because she passed all her references
Since she moved she has been a good tenant and now has fallen ill with Corona Virus
I have been seeking work for many years and unsuccessful and this is my main income
I am very worried with the plight of the tenant as she has signed for a fixed tenancy of two and a half years
I will ring the Estate Agents to see if they can see how she is
Now I will be worried everyday and this will make me worse as it is my main income
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Roukaya
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Hi Roukaya, I think you said your tenant had been furloughed so she should have the ability to carry on paying the rent. As you say, your anxieties are making you worry more about this issue. Has there been any indication there will be a problem with rent because if there hasn't you are causing yourself needles worry. Think that, even in the worse case scenario, your tenant would be entitled to get help to pay her rent. Worrying about something that might not even occur is going to increase your stress levels. Try to just let it pan out. Worrying wont change any outcome it will just affect you. I think with what is happening at the moment with the new lockdown and the uncertainties, it's quite easy to overthink and take things out of proportion. I know it's difficult but try to stay calm about your tenants situation as there may not be any problems at all. ππ
Thank you for your reply and I have no choice but to wait and see
I have taken rent guarantee insurance at the beginning of the Tenancy and this can only apply if the tenant has missed two months rent
I have asked the agent to call the tenant to see how she is abs they will be careful with her
I know I have far too much time on my hands
I realise more than ever how important it is to find the years work experience and pass the two exams and eventually sell the flat and remove my worry concerning the rental income
The rent is due in two weeks and she was previously furloughed in the first Lockdown and this was also at a time of COVID
Thanks for listening and I hope you keep well during this second lock down
The agent rang the tenant and the tenant is at home and is feeling much better
I think I will just have to wait and see in two weeks to see if the rent is paid
The tenant did not mention to the agent she is furloughed but I think I could contact the lettings team who vetted the tenant to see if she is furloughed
I will just have to wait and see
Thank you for listening
Hi Roukaya, I think that financial worries can really sap your positivity level. There's not much that can alleviate your worry but time and a good outcome, but you aren't alone in this. Businesses are folding, and some of the people who were doing the best, are now doing the worst. So you are at least in very good company.
Changing fortunes do often make people very much more resilient. I had one thrust upon me a long time ago, and of course I survived it. It's what we do. I was always poorer financially after it, but I grew in spirit and confidence and just learned to live with what I did have.
Hoping things will work out well, and as Piglet said to Pooh :
"Promise me you'll always remember: you're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." -A A Milne-
I hope you can try to see it from my point of view that this is my main income and this worries me
I have not even had the chance to work given personal reasons
It worries me a great deal and I have no choice but to wait and see the situation of the tenant once the Estate Agent rings
This situation makes me feel worse in the sense if I had a job I would have been furloughed but there is no safety net for me apart from my savings and rent guarantee insurance I had taken at the start of the tenancy
I am so sorry that things are difficult for you at the moment.
As someone who has previously struggled with anxiety problems, (and who has been trained in mental health issues,) I would encourage you to take action to deal with your anxiety problems as you will then be able to face everything life throws at you without the horrible burden of anxiety holding you back. In my experience in my own life and in supporting other people with anxiety, we tend to think that once the issues making us anxious go away, we will stop feeling the anxiety. The reality is that if we have well established patterns of anxiety, this will not be the case.
Anxiety is much more about our habits of thinking and processing than about our particular individual life circumstances. The great thing is that we can change these habits.
There are several main ways to change our difficulties with anxiety - people can choose to try some or all of them to change things. Here are a few:
1) Relaxing the body will automatically help the mind relax. Try breathing exercises, guided relaxation, meditation, mindfulness, gentle exercise.
2) Changing one's thought processes. Try getselfhelp.org.uk (lots of ideas and simple exercises,) Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, hypnotherapy.
3) Medication. Many people are wary of this, but it can be helpful to lower anxieties to a level where the person is able to learn how to deal with the issue of anxiety. The medication can then often be reduced and even discontinued.
4) Counselling or psychotherapy. This is for when the person would like to explore how and why their patterns of thinking came about, often involving learning to understand our early lives and family dynamics and how they formed our patterns of thinking. It an be incredibly liberating and powerful when accessed through a compassionate and skilled professional practitioner.
I hope you won't mind my long post. I just know how amazing it is when one realises that anxiety isn't simply life's events affecting us or a part of who we are as a person. It is a horrible, unhelpful burden that we do have the power to change.
Dealing with anxiety won't necessarily change what is going on in a person's life, but it will make them much more able to deal with it better and it will help them make better decisions based on logic rather than on paralysing anxiety.
Anxiety I am being to realise stems from fear and insecurity.
I think my panic stems from the financial problems I had to resolve concerning a property portfolio in financial distress which I turned around and protected my Father from potential bankruptcy
This is why when I heard the tenant is ill I thought of the worst case scenario
Again my Father was attacked in Dec 2010 by one of his tenants over Christmas and this is why I informed my Mother it is best I stay here alone over the Christmas holiday period and go over once the I have sat the exams in January
I suffer from anxiety but as you rightly say it is rooted in past experiences which trigger painful struggles
I appreciate you thoughtful and kind post and it is possible for you to make positive and progressive steps ahead as you are clearly an intelligent person with great insight
Again I sat two exams at the end of September , I was scared as it was as my first time on line and I scored 42.5 percent
I was less scared with the second exam and passed with 61 per cent
I can now see how detrimental anxiety can be and quite destructive
I cared for my Father a very intelligent person but who became mentally impaired so I can see the signs
I have toxic relatives who I have chosen to ignore and walk away from given their hurtful and offensive remarks
I have explained this to my Mum who can at least agree with my reasoning
I think mental health is fundamentally important for our ability to create a better and peaceful life
Thank you for your excellent and well valued advice which is appreciated
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