Update .. sad news good news: I am going to start... - PMRGCAuk

PMRGCAuk

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Update .. sad news good news

54 Replies

I am going to start with sad ..... my brother in law my twin sisters husband of 48 yrs just found out he has stage 4 lung cancer. He will try one round of chemo if it doesn’t make him sick he will most likely do more.

So it made my decision to move again easier. I am on a waiting list in same town as my sister owns a home. I will not move in with them. You would have to know more about twins to know it won’t work for us. I will miss my critters and creek but not the apt. The creaking floors with being able to hear the loud creaking from both sides...I was handling it ok until my one neighbor got a boyfriend n now it is people in and out all day. He is not a nice person n has been harassing me. I pray for him.

Next....This town does not have enough bandwidth so I only get WiFi access for about 15 days. My new place will have WiFi the town is about 6000 so I will still be rural but with a lot more shopping choices. So I read a lot of posts but can’t write.

Been trying to keep the stress down but my brother being sick has hit me hard.

Good New

pre diabetic

I was given a glucose monitor and my morning blood sugars shocked me into That’s it.. so I gave 4 bags of groceries to the neighbor and started the ketogenic diet. In 3 days time I am shocked. I am not hungry at all and the best part is my head STOPPED sweating. I know I have been told to toss the carbs but I could never get past the 3 days because after 3 days your appetite is suppressed. Oh n I have lost 1 lb a day.

More good news....

I found my mother... my mother’s ashes were with my step dad who was really my only dad. Well he died years later and the plans were being done on who would take them where they wanted to go. But as most of us know time flies so in 2012 my step sister died and I didn’t find that out until 3 years after. So now we don’t know how to get in touch with her hubby and I am freaking out thinking my mom has been dumped in the garbage. I had been saying my night prayers when a picture of my old old address book and saw where his number was. He has them the are safe n now I feel so much better...

Medical news

I am at 19 mgs and have the best eye physician ever. He said let’s slow down n stop yo-yo up n down. He is great and I will be moving 20 minutes away from him and my dermatologist instead of over the mountains for 2 1/2 hrs. The drive was lovely but can’t go once it starts snowing. I didn’t realize when I moved that it would be in the mountains. I spent Thanksgiving n Christmas by myself as it was to much snow to get to my sisters.

On my new lifestyle of eating I might get better quicker. We can only hope.

That’s enough of an update Sorry for the book.....😲

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54 Replies
SheffieldJane profile image
SheffieldJane

It is wonderful to hear your newsi am sorry about your twin’s husband. My son in law’s mum has stage 4 breast cancer - she seems fitter than me. ?

I am so glad that you found your mother - oh sweetheart!

I am glad that you have one of those angel doctors.

Your life is amazing, you know!

Sending loves and hugs, ( write a book). Jane x

in reply to SheffieldJane

You are so amazing Sheffieldjane.... you make me laugh. Thanks🤪

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell

Although it is sad news about your BIL most of your news great. It will be great to be near your twin. I am not a twin but have over 300 miles between me and my sister. Good luck with everythingxx

in reply to Yellowbluebell

Yeah I thought when I moved it was closer. When renting apt out of state you forget to ask about mountains and distance. She was only an inch away on my map.

This has been a new learning experience for me living where I do. It is hard not to react to other people’s issues.

For example I made a comment about all the cigarette butts everywhere and it just looks tacky. Ok I might have worded it differently but the next thing I know I have cig butts on my private patio and in my garden area right out front. Go figure....

I must have insulted the new boyfriend because I didn’t like him asking if I wanted a threesome. I am not a prude but that is way out of line and you should see this guy. He is so skinny if he turns sideways you don’t see him and his hair and beard are about the same length.... so he now takes the dog out back on the lawn and sits down outside my window. Hello their is 100 feet at least out there why keep sitting there.

I stay inside all the time now it is just too strange. As a Chaplain I worked with a lot of characters but this place is run by one person and I am not on her good side.

So I have been so kind to her I gave her my groceries etc and now it is almost funny how she is trying to figure it out. I truly can’t help much but to pray for them all.

My new place doesn’t have younger people on disability I really can’t blame them for wanting to have fun just not next door to me.

Lessons are being learned I thought at my age I would be done but apparently not.😜

HeronNS profile image
HeronNS in reply to

You should write a book! You really can paint a picture with your words. Hope next move goes smoothly and you end up having what I think you had expected in the first place. Best wishes.

in reply to HeronNS

I am a bit animated lolol.. You would have busted up when I used to do classes with seniors. I loved to say Picture this. In my 7 yrs with 5 senior groups a homeless group of women and another younger women's group.... My claim to fame was no one ever went to sleep in any of my classes. Most were 2 hrs long. It was the best 7 yrs of my life. I did write a book about it but it is lost inside a broken computer. But all the memories are in my heart. Once I get moved I think I will find out how to blog...

Ohohoh... I have been working at home you know folding wash n dishes n I have not had my head break out in a flood. Oh I pray this is permanent I would not go out much because I was so embarrassed... 😢

HeronNS profile image
HeronNS in reply to

If you still have that broken computer, or at least the hard drive, find a skilled tech who can help you retrieve your data.

My husband started to write a book about a particular local historical figure and that was before we knew about the dangers of computer viruses. Our hard drive got wiped. There were basically only enough files left to turn the machine on and off, all our data was lost. I'd started editing a novel I'd written, but it was no big deal as the novel was a regular typewritten piece and I'd been entering it into the computer from that hard copy. But i never did start the editing process again so my novel may not be in a broken computer but it languishes in a drawer....

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply to

It doesnt seem to matter how we ourselves decide to live or where we do that living there will always be people who have to hurt, annoy or just disturb other with their behaviour. Plus it's hard to be your self when people are like this to you. Doesnt sound like many people would like a threesome with the neighbours boyfriend!!

Just look forward to your life in your new place nearer your sister. Good luck with your move and remember not to get too stressedxx Debs

in reply to Yellowbluebell

The first day I moved in a whole group was outside. I was planning on a low profile and make friends at church. Not here....

My next move I will stay low and be more careful on whom I share with. When I was waiting for the manager I met about 6 folks all appeared to ....not be off their bipolar meds .....and acted rather normal. They have a clubhouse and laundry ... we don’t have a clubhouse here. Anyway none of them looked like they will go flippy on me.. there is only 25 units all single story and attached four in a row I am praying for an end unit so one less wall to hear thru.

I know that no matter where you go we will always find sad people. In reality they are our teachers.... with God it is about our hearts. I just wished I could graduate as I get weary of so many lessons.

🤪

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply to

My mum has finally decided nearly 20 years after my dad dying that she is ready for sheltered housing. She is moving away from the village they moved to 33 years ago and one where they both had friends. She is actually moving to a fantastic place where her best friend has just moved to where there is a whole host of things like restaurant and club and activities. Only problem is my mum is likely to be the neighbour from hell you are moving to avoid!! I hope everything goes well for you and that maybe you have learnt all you need to live peacefullyxx

in reply to Yellowbluebell

I figured out what I will do..

well hi it is nice to meet you....let me introduce my friend Harvey... Harvey say hi.... what do you mean they can’t hear you that is nonsense I hear you just fine. ,.... so sorry about my friend he is not usually so rude.......

It has possibilities..... 🐢

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply to

That sounds like my mother during a drinking bout!! Maybe a step too far but they will leave you alone!!

CT-5012 profile image
CT-5012

Lovely to hear from you but sad about your news of your BIL. I hope your move goes well and you enjoy being closer to your sister I guess she is going to need your support. All good wishes.

in reply to CT-5012

Thanks so much. Yes my sister calls me more than ever. It will be nice to be closer for sure. It just feels strange to know he is dying it is so undoing and I am one of those twins who feels my sisters emotions and twice I have felt...once when she had her baby I was at friends house for New Years brunch...told them I would be back soon had to get home for the call. I was back in 20 minutes. Second time I had gone to the doctors and thought I was having appendicitis’s he said go home and let’s see what happens. I was in pain n bed from that Friday until Monday when I called my mom. She said you will never guess what happened to your twin. Oh yeah I can. She had her appendix rupture. Years later I had to have a complete hysterectomy and told the doc to take my appendix he said sorry we can’t do incidental anymore...he told me after he took it as it was getting re@dy to rupture...

I shared all that to share this. I get 10 anti anxiety pills a year. They are my binky blanket. Well I gave some to my sister... so one day I am falling apart an I call her and said take at least half a pill.. she did we both felt better.👭

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply to

That is slightly spooky but well documented amongst twins ir other multiples. My sister would deprive herself just to see how I would react!!

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador

Good to see you back and very sorry to hear about BIL. A close friend was dx'd with something similar in January and died at the end of April, we were unable to see her as she lived a long way away and couldn't talk on the phone as it affected a nerve so she couldn't talk, just whisper.

Had random tourists from Scotland heading for Croatia looking for directions here on Friday. They had a automobile club itinerary print out that didn't make sense - they are based on street names that no-one local knows - and the only map they had was one for the whole of Europe! Nowhere looks far on that. They were driving a veteran Citroen 2CV and towing a trailer (the engine is 600cc!!!!!). The road the itinerary gave is through the middle of mountains and I've driven it with my 2 litre diesel and thought it was hairy with steep roads and hairpin bends! It never occurred to me at the time it was that road - so I sent them via Cortina d'Ampezzo which is a reasonable road! I do hope they didn't get too lost! But I could not believe they had no map ...

Constance13 profile image
Constance13 in reply to PMRpro

I wouldn't dream of travelling anywhere nowadays without a navi!!

We stayed in Cortina d'Ampezzo for a week (camping) years ago. Often travelled to Italy when we lived in Bavaria.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply to Constance13

Where were you in Bayern - when was it?

Their print-out was the same sort of instructions the navi gives - but they had to interpret it. It hadn't occured to them to look at the distance in the extreme left column which is how far to the next thing to do. And when you have your head down looking at it (or up seeing the scenery which surely is why you use the by roads????) you miss the next turn when it is only 200 yards. Gladys, our navi, annoys me greatly (her Italian pronounciation is rubbish) but at least she tells us how far it is to the turn-off!!!!

Constance13 profile image
Constance13 in reply to PMRpro

We call our navi "she"! A really pleasant English voice!😀

We lived in Ingolstadt from 1959 to 62. Not a particularly nice town then (it's much improved now). But it was on the Danube and lovely villages not too far away.

We were teaching in a Berlitz Sprachenschule. Lots of long weekends and holidays.😎

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply to Constance13

Our VOICE is OK - just her foreign language skills leave us wondering what on earth she just said!!!!

in reply to PMRpro

Believe me the English versions are not any better. The rythmn of what they is way off. Must confess I thought Navi was a person when I first read through. Mine should have a Spanish name. But I have got to say navi's save you life when you first drive on the continent and you only have to focus on driving on the road not working out where you should go.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply to

True - but I still can't believe they set off without a decent map!!!! Roads get closed!!! Especially here. And the diversions can be of the magnitude of via a different country!!!!!! Like using the Brenner Pass rather than the Reschen Pass (though both end up in Austria they are a considerable distance apart).

We left a campsite south of Bozen/Bolzano to come home for a doctor's appointment in the afternoon. The first traffic report informed us the Brenner motorway AND the ordinary road were both closed because of accidents within a few hundred yards of each other and was likely to be closed for hours. There is no obvious diversion - except over mountain passes in the middle of the Dolomites. You have to have a map to know that is an option.

in reply to PMRpro

Oh.no always need a map too. I had to get rid of my shredded one but miss it. The only doo thing is the screen in my build in one is very big but if that break down I would be buggered so map time...thanks for the reminder.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply to

What annoys me is the lack of long distance overview. I like to see the entire journey in one before I set off - especially as I do the driving, he fiddles with the sat nav or map. He can't map read quickly so if I leave the motorway for some reason he struggles to know what I need to do. The sat nav wants you to turn around!!

in reply to PMRpro

Yes that's what I like about hardcopy too.

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply to

I have got lost so many times and it is well known I have no sense of direction so the sat nav (no name just "it" is usually set for me. I even had to have it set to go to scats house just 4 miles away!! And yes I still got lost!!

in reply to Yellowbluebell

I think the built in ones are a bit better as they are updated themselves I presume.

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply to

Yes ours tells us when we need to update it! I have only just mastered this one after 3 years and our new car is due in September and as it's a different make of car I am assuming the sat nav will be different again! Oh what fun!!

in reply to PMRpro

Yeah his time won’t be too long I am afraid it has already moved to other places.

As to those talking directions. I had one and picked the British gal loved her voice but not her directions. I was in sales my last job n traveled to people’s homes. She took me up an old road over the hills turned into an extra hour and finally brought me down to the street that ran right in front of their home. We all had a good laugh. 😂

Rugger profile image
Rugger

So sorry to hear about your sister's husband. She will really value your closeness when you move. I live more than 200 miles from my sister & husband, niece and nephew & family and miss being close to them all. It's 40 years since I lived anywhere near to her.

What a shower some of your neighbours are. We have one difficult one, but she spends half the time at her boyfriend's and we're grateful to him for that!

How lovely that you know where your mom's ashes are. You must feel so relieved.

It will be good to be nearer to your doctors when you need them. I am blessed with a wonderful GP just one mile away and a Rheumatologist 10 miles away. So much to be grateful for on this PMR 'journey'.

I agree with the others that you should write a book, or at least the blog! There are people who can get data out of broken computers!

Keep up the good work with your diet and I hope you continue to feel better for it.

Me: PMR since May 2016; several flares; now on 6mg and last week developed shingles!

Jackoh profile image
Jackoh in reply to Rugger

Shingles! Oh no. Developed shingles in February this year. Wasn’t too bad and didn’t affect the PMRGCA but what a pain ( literally!)

Rugger profile image
Rugger in reply to Jackoh

Thanks for the sympathy, Jackoh! Day 4 and it's beginning to ease. I look an awful sight, though - it's on my head and face!

Jackoh profile image
Jackoh in reply to Rugger

Oh that’s hard when it’s in head and face. Mine was in the small of my back and spread round the top of the leg and in between legs. Rest and get well. Xx

Rugger profile image
Rugger in reply to Jackoh

Thank you Jackoh. I've been feeling glad that it's on my face, so that clothes aren't rubbing on the blisters, which are now beginning to heal. Thankful for small mercies! Yours sounded awful - sitting and walking must have been really sore. I'm taking it easy - something that PMR has taught us to do! xx

Jackoh profile image
Jackoh in reply to Rugger

Yes!! X

in reply to Rugger

Ok ouch on the shingles.

My sister and I are getting closer all the time. She will actually listen to me about my Pmr now. Oh how I am going to hate telling her that all her nagging me about carbs etc.... well off carbs for 5 days weight is down 10 lbs. I know it is the water weight for such a drop but I will take it anyway I can. In the pic of me I am at 270 lbs. I have skinny arms and ankles so people would say oh your not that fat... it was my skinny personality that got them oh n I am tall which always helps. So let’s see if I can los 100 more without killing me...😇

Grants148 profile image
Grants148

Dear Lyn-calif,l am sorry that your twins’ husband is so ill,l hope that he has a good outcome from the Chemo.l am pleased that you will be moving nearer your sister,the area sounds a lot nicer ,and she will be pleased to have you close by,l am pleased that your mothers’ ashes have been found,the answer to your prayers .l hope that you will feel much better before too long and that your home move goes well xx.

in reply to Grants148

Yeah thanks, I am first on the list for the next available apt. It will be nice having more choices in restaurants than pizza. No more pizza. I know I usually only like the toppings anyway so I will order pizza in a bowl no dough. Hmmm I wonder...🤔

bunnymom profile image
bunnymom

It is so good to hear from you and will be glad when you are a regular again. Life to too short for miserable neighbor's. Glad you are moving nearer to family. You will be a blessing to your sister and family. Wishing you well.

in reply to bunnymom

Hi bunny mom,

They are sorta counting on me as I am an ex nurse. So far there is no need to tell him what most people go thru. He has no pain takes more naps but otherwise still teaching their bible study at their home. Last week was his birthday my sister cried knowing it was going to be his last. She had called me from the grocery but she pulled it together and made dinner for 15 people....those folks are goin* to miss him bad. 😪

Telian profile image
Telian

Welcome back! I remember your last move - if my memory serves me correctly!

Was it you with the unhappy cat last time you moved?

So sorry to hear about your BIL and hope his treatment helps.

I hate unneighbourly people with vengeance- no one should have to put up with that. I am so pleased you’re moving to be near your sister- it seems long overdue from what you say. You’ll be able to support one another. No more Thanksgiving on your own! I’m delighted you’ve located your Mum’s ashes too. Someone is looking over you.

We shall be moving over 200 miles next month to be near our eldest son and family for ill health reasons. I have cared for my hubby for over 25 years and he’s not getting any better and it gets harder. I can’t wait to be near them as they are always so supportive. Like you I will miss the area - we’re currently a mile from the sea front - but I’ve told myself I won’t have time to miss it once we’re all together again. Been here 31 years.

You being nearer your Doctor is great too, I am so pleased for you. You won’t miss that journey for sure. A new life is certainly on the horizon!

Let us know how the move goes.

Jackoh profile image
Jackoh in reply to Telian

That sounds very exciting Telian- moving near your son and wife. We have recently done the same - moved near eldest daughter and husband and have really appreciated it. All the very best.

Telian profile image
Telian in reply to Jackoh

Thank you Jackoh - it is so exciting - and good to hear your move has made everyone happy. Mine can’t wait for us to get there and we’re chomping at the big for a date now - then I can truly relax! So pleased for you.

in reply to Telian

Yes my poor baby Nellie was so sick on the trip. She finally needed to be put down. She was an older cat and I got her for my Valentine present and had her for 3 years as it was almost valentines again. She was the most amazin* cat she truly would say hi to you when you came home...she definitely knew NO...

This is probably a repeat but a week after she was gone ,....one of the neighbors had 5 cats and she had died. They were coming to take them to the pound I wasn’t emotionally ready but went and got one. She is 6 beautiful calico. She is not smart like Nellie but she is winning my heart. Being with so many cats actually makes them a bit feral. She would get so scared when I would pick her up but now she is doing so much better.

She is a fat cat so have the blessing of her not on my art table or counters.😸

Telian profile image
Telian in reply to

Poor Nellie, I recall all of that. At least you have another pal you can mould - good she can't get on your counter top etc. Keep us updated with the move.

Jackoh profile image
Jackoh

Hi - how good to hear from you again and to hear all your news. It’s a shame you haven’t got good WiFi where you are - did wonder how you were doing. Lots of positives on the horizon to look forward to. So sorry to hear about BIL.

in reply to Jackoh

Hi Jackoh...yeah I was really upset about WiFi. I use a hot spot on my phone but it cannot go over 15g or whatever it means so I get WiFi good for 15 days then not so good the rest. There is one company I could get more from but I won’t pay $80 a month just for WiFi. In small towns they say oh it is because we are rural...yeah right....🙀

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass

Hi there Lin-calif. I have to say, I have enjoyed reading your news, and yes, you should write a book or try to retrieve the one you wrote that's now in the broken computer. Your news has made me smile! I can't get over how your neighbours boyfriend asked you that! What are some peope like!! And as for sitting beneath your window, you could get him for harassment! Or drench him with water. Your description of him was so funny!!! 🤣 🤣 🤣 All the best with the move and diet, let us know how both go. X

in reply to Lonsdalelass

Oops! Read the last post I guess I wrote it to myself...🚲

Hi Lonsdalelass,

Here is how I figured if I simply made a comment about cigarette butts and now have them in my yard ... getting him for harassment would escalate things out of control. I am taking the high road on this....I hate we are told to pray for our enemies .....but no where does it say I can’t pray he gets hit by a truck .....🙏

I am going to try and get my book out of my broken lap top. I was witness to so many miracles and that is why I wrote it. I do have a copy of first draft but the best final one is trapped....🤔

CT-5012 profile image
CT-5012 in reply to

A big truck, a seriously big truck. 🚛

Ciar profile image
Ciar

Good luck with the Keto diet. My brothers say it makeS them feel well. I’ll be interested to hear how you’re doing with that. I need to eliminate carbs but like you say, have had a very hard time doing it. Have gained 13 pounds on prednisone in 2.4 years (and rising) and know what to do, though too lame to manage it.

in reply to Ciar

I have been on prednisone for almost 4 yrs methotrexate is where I gained 80 lbs. I felt so sick I thought I was dying so I ate and ate and ate. I felt better eating....

Anyway on this Keto diet I think it is now 4 or 5 day. I am not hungry at all. I am making fun things to eat and just now took all the breads tortillas out to the trash.

It is time for my second meal and I am going to get a hunk of chicken breast cut up a tomato to top it then slices of cheddar cheese zap it let the cheese melt and it is yummy and filling.

Yesterday I had half a large avocado with 4 pieces of shrimp in horseradish sauce ....too die for good had that for 2 meals yesterday.

I somehow forgot to take my meds yesterday feel a bit spacy but no Pmr pain or GCA..... need to go get my meal now.. it used to be one of my favorite sandwiches so now I am having my sandwiches without the bread.

I know if you don’t lose the weight now well it could keep climbing. 🦔

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass

Oh your comments are so funny!! Bet your book is brill!! 🤣 🤣 🤣 You're a real tonic! X

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