Confused

[Amigos123]

78 years old, can’t believe I never knew this was so prevalent.

Fractured lower vertebrae’s 2 year ago, 8 months ago ,pain, hard getting out of chair,walking. Physical therapy helped.MRI showed bone impingement on root nerve. Felt numb in vagina

After few months started feeling like sitting on ball.

Gynecologist tried 2 pessarys ,1st popped out, second ,gellhorn,

Felt like he was ripping insides putting in and taking. He ordered it, I’m supposed to get it 17th. Decided not to get pessary unless he can fit me with one not so painful.

In much pain from vertebrae’s and nerve impingement, pain in back, hips, legs.

Don’t know what to do.

[Mae123]

Hi

So sorry for you. I had slipped disc 11 years ago and had the operation to correct this. It's a long recovery process but it did cure it. As far as the other things are concerned, the pessary. Ask for a soft silicon one. You can buy them off the internet. They are about 50 pounds. Hope your this helps.

[Amigos123 in reply to Mae123]

Thank you for answering and I am asking for soft silicone this time.

Hope it works.

[beatitude]

Sorry to hear of your pain, but I am confused, too - as to what you are going to get on 17th. Is this a third pessary? Please don't let anyone try ramming those dreadful rigid PVC things into you. I've been there myself and wish they could be banned. They think we will put up with it because we don't know any better. Like Mae says, there are the folding ones, but we are not always told about them. If you live in the UK, they are available on NHS prescription and free to those of us over 60. I found that, nevertheless, some doctors refuse to prescribe them - tearful visits and wasted appointments. What I did was find out which hospitals stocked silicone ones and insist on being referred there. Trying to find out contact details for hospital gynaecologists and their secretaries, through whom you have to communicate, is time-consuming and not easy, but you could try doing it through PALS, the NHS liaison people. It was worth it, for me, even though it meant being put on a waiting-list, because otherwise you won't know what size to buy, it's not cheap, and you've no-one to check the fit for you. Also, some companies that make them don't reply, and some don't sell direct to the public, and tell you this, to safeguard both you and themselves, because you SHOULD get any pessary you haven't tried before, checked by a professional. I wanted to go down the pessary route but it took me six months of perseverance to get a silicone one that I could actually use, during which I had to put up with an inch of uterus hanging right out.

Maybe you've got a prolapse that was brought on by the fracture, as there are ligaments at the lower end of the spine that hold the pelvic organs in place which could have got damaged by it. Poor you!

It disgusts me how brutal some of these doctors are. I know exactly what you mean regarding pessaries, as the same happened to me. They tore at me and shredded my skin until I bled, in their attempts to get a rigid one in and out. They lied to me that it wouldn't hurt. Here they are, at it again with someone else. You have so much sympathy from me. If you DO go back to the same doctor, please don't be rushed or pressurised into accepting anything that hurts; ask to feel the pessary in your hand first, and ask for a demonstration of insertion by using their hands, before they actually do it to YOU. I wish I'd done that, if only I'd known. Best of luck.

[Amigos123 in reply to beatitude]

Thank you so much.

The 17 th I do not intend to get the Gellhorn pessary unless I can put in and take out myself.

I will ask if it is soft silicone, if not will not try it.

I agree the prolapse was caused from fall, its hard in USA

to get good medical care if over 70 and a female.

I plan on following your advice to ask for demonstration,

If when I try, it is so painful I will refuse it.

I feel so resentful about the lack of understanding in medical field. Especially, the lack of education in it for

all women. It will be interesting how doctor responds with me not being the sheep I was when in his office last time.

Thank you again, stay well.

[beatitude in reply to Amigos123]

Hi! Sorry I didn't ask where you lived, as some of what I said only applies in UK. I think gellhorns are harder for the patient to get in and out herself than some of the others. I hope you find someone who can offer you a choice of pessary if you need another kind. What is this ageist - sexist stuff you have encountered? That's terrible! And it makes me angry that so many of us, as you can read on this site, didn't know about all this until it happened to US. Let me know how you get on on Wednesday, if you wish to. I hope all goes to plan for you. Best wishes.

[Amigos123 in reply to beatitude]

Saw doctor today and I am going to therapist that specializes in pelvic floor.

Docto said if I want I can come back and try different pessaries. I’m not ruling it out but hopefully the therapy will help.

I am still wondering why this problem so many women have isn’t talked about. I grew up in the 50s , sex,Kotex,pregnant were words not talked about. Women have come a long way but have long way to go!