Nursing Homes

I have been advised to put my husbands name down for a nursing home should his dementia get worse. He also has PD. Made the mistake of taking him with me today to look at some and when we got home he burst out crying which lasted for an hour. Took me ages to let him know that we were only looking in case something happened to me and I couldn't look after him for a while. I won't make that mistake again.

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  • That must have been difficult. I don't look forward to that day. We have built a handicapped accessible ranch to accommodate his possible future needs. God willing, I will stay healthy enough to care for him with some assistance from family and agencies. God Bless and I hope you find a place that will give him the loving care he deserves.

  • I was once told by an embittered girl friend that I would end up a lonely old man in a nursing home, This was before the Devil's Puppeteer tried to take my life from me but it has haunted me ever since. I am thought of as very intelligent, but really I just soak up facts and information like a sponge so the thought of dementia and to be no longer be able to remember the accumulated information, fills me with dread.

    You females probably already know we males are a strange animal but remember this, despite mankind's achievements we are still very primitive emotionally. Primitive man's job was to impregnate the female to continue the human race and then to feed and protect that or any other female from harm.

    We are still primitive and the thought of not being able to provide for and protect family and loved ones fills a man with strong emotional feelings of failure.

  • Despite 18 months of psychotherapy, I still have failure issue having closed my PT practice of 20+ years.

  • At least you were honest with him and did not do it behind his back I think that is the most important thing.

  • Nursing homes can be wonderful and scary, you say he has dementia, maybe he won't know when the time arrives when nursing home care is needed. While noble of you to take him with you must realize you will be making his health care plans for the future and for you also, Find a place you are comfortable at because if you can't stand to be there you won't be there. The scary part is being alone, Yes there are many other things but think about being alone, ill and trapped in your pd body, then trapped in your mind, you'd cry too. KADIE

  • I would do nursing home as a last result, like you said if something were to happen to you. We live in the States and the price of a nursing home is no cheaper than having someone come in for 24 hours a day to your home. The level of care that you get from home health is much higher than at a nursing home. That said, there are some very nice assisted living places which would be great to live in. The costs for assisted living, nursing homes and in home health are crazy high here in the US.

  • You are soooo right....and we took that approach with my Dad who had PD for 11 years. He was so much happier and stimulated on every level with home health care as opposed to a nursing home. JJMoore....don't rush into it. It's not easy, but so worth it in the end.

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