Well folks, the day has arrived, I'm off to see the Pain Service at St Thomas' this afternoon for assessment. They will be assessing whether I am a candidate for Spinal Cord Stimulation ( SCS) and I'm at that jangly and overwhelmed place of really not wanting to go, not having the stomach for yet more huge surgery having had 40+ years of multiple major surgeries and countless pain management procedures. It's been relentless all these years.
I know I need to go but it's real rock and hard place stuff. If I don't go I'll always wonder if there could have been some respite ( tho it won't lead to a pain free life, I'm realistic about that) If offered and I go ahead, I'm opening myself up to months and months of appointments and surgeries ahead before I have any idea whether there will be any improvement. The thought of living with all the technology inside me is daunting too - my sons already say I'm more metal than Mum 😏
On the up side, I'll have a remote control that 'himself' won't be able to flick around the channels with 😉 and the fun of setting off alarms when I go out of shops!!
Perhaps I'll offer pretty good scrap value when I shuffle off?!!
So, spare a thought for a scared Shirley this afternoon if you would? I'm really hoping I meet with a Consultant who actually gets what we live with. I'm dreading the going through the history bit, as even tho I've lived it, even I am shocked at just how much I've been through for so many years - very hard to come face to face with that person being me.
Hoping everyone having as comfortable a day as possible