what do I need to do: what do I need to do to... - Pain Concern

Pain Concern

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what do I need to do

what do I need to do to get my gp(gps) to listen to me .another sleepless night.cant cope with the pain any more I need to know the cause.its not only fibro.too many other symptoms and too much concern from my dogs.i pray he will listen to me and give me the chance to talk and get the answers i need so much.fibro doesn't cause swelling and inflammation.as much as I appreciate those who support me I also need the support of my doctors and im not getting it most of the time.cant afford to go private again and I cant expect others to pay for it.

altho last time he agreed my nasal sores had cleared they keep recurring and he hasn't accepted that I have bone growth in my nose and brow bone.he didn't support me after I received ENT's diagnosis of "it s not your sinuses".

21 Replies

Have you got a family member or friend who can go with you?

This may help to lessen your worry/

Pat x

in reply to Bananas5

Hi there,not really.I have little support from the one family member who lives near me.I am not duly worried but feel he won't accept what I tell him.have friends but not any that I trust implicably.have kept a diary of my symptoms and when they started plus how I feel about things and a list of things to put to him,it will be a start if he does agree with me re ENT,its nasal/throat and pelvic pain I need answers for.and to realise that my weight gain is not general.

OK I just thought you were asking for help.

Remember your appt is nprmally only for 10 mins. Hope he listens and you can explin quickly!

Pat x

thanks Pat.normally seek advice .i know I only get 10 minutes and even less than that cos his room is at the end of a longish corridor and i can only walk slow and then they want time to type up notes.have everything written down.In the past when i said I wanted a copy of my notes ,his response was "I hope its nothing sinister".i have never wanted anything but answers and its them not giving them.ive always had a valid reason to see gp which takes up 1 1/2 to 2 hours of my day each time I go and he records things like "headache",don't go to gp for a headache.(this WAS in my notes).

Hi anbuma , all I can suggest to you is you are responsible for your health, so if you feel you have a valid reason to take up your GPs time, then stop worrying about him and just go in and be firm about what you need to know. Tell him yor worried about your problem, and you need some answers and reassuring. Good Luck

Hello annbuma3, good advice from everyone some doctors do get confused if you try to sort out more than one thing at a time. But here is another way ask for a double appointment to sort out your concerns it may take a few weeks to get one but it is worth a try. Other than that make an official complaint to discuss the concerns you have that you feel are not being addressed, you won't be flavour of the month of course but it may help to improve communications with the medics at your practice. I've just been reading that in my area too few complaints are brought against GPs, but I would say they are human too and can get things wrong, totally and utterly wrong on some occasions just like ourselves . Some of it due to pressure or human error. So don't feel you can't question a doctors decision you will of course have to be strong, assertive and firm. Avoid anger even if you feel it. Good luck with sorting things out.

in reply to katieoxo60

Hi KAtie.my surgery don't allow double appointments.i have complained in the past to the practice manager and to PALS| to no avail.the practice sided with the gp and PALS gave no resolution .all it led to was them threatening to remove me from their patient lists.so if I complain again it wont get me anywhere.there is a difference between "getting things wrong"and blatantly refusing to treat me.I have always maintained the same as I have always said yet they still insist I have constipation despite me saying that my bowels are normal.i don't know why he has become like the way he is ,all ive ever wanted is answers not to be told "what things are not".

katieoxo60 profile image
katieoxo60 in reply to

I would suggest in that case that maybe you need to change doctors as obviously you are being victimised for complaining if they are threatening to remove you from their list.That is not allowed anymore.I understand what you are saying including wanting to know what it is, not what you don't have. Think the saying is been there done that got the T shirt on more than one occasion. Sad to say it is no help when you are ill in the night and a doctor thinks it is just minor, to you it is awful and soul destroying. And I have been through it too so can comment, and feel for you in your hour of need. It would take me a year to explain all the departments I've been through over the years trying to get answers and it still goes on. Concentrate on relieving the symptoms if you can before challenging the doctors approach that way it gives you more strength to deal with poor outcomes. You may even have to prove you need treatment to be able to go forward and that might need independent advice.It won't be easy but you need support not apathy. Best Wishes and hope you feel a little better today. I truelly do understand due to experience. xx

in reply to katieoxo60

I don't want to make a complaint but somebody has to take me seriously.woke at 2.30 and 3.40.cant sleep -for neck and stomach .cough again when lie down and abdo discomfort /pressure/heaviness/head if fuzzy.feeling cold and hands stinging.scalp sores spreading and irritating.

thanks guys.wise words taken to heart.i found thta out too but it does depend on the doctor.some will give you as much time as it takes.my gp does go over time with some patients cos he is always running late btu then some patients are in and out in seconds.thereagain it is extremely difficult to get an appointment with my own gp sometimes weeks.i have gone in with one concern .there is a lack of support cos after seeing the consultants and not gettign a diagnosis i went to discuss it with my gp and got no help.

Hi Anbuma, really sorry you're feeling so frustrated with your G.P. I can empathise, it's true G.P's hate to see a list of problems, I think they make up their mind what's wrong with you there and then. Have you thought of focussing on one problem at a time if you don't feel they're connected and even ask for a second opinion if you're not satisfied, you are entitled to it. You can then repeat visits for your other problems. I appreciate getting an appointment is not easy but try and persevere. Can you make appointments on-line? If I want to see a particular G.P. I keep checking at various times during the day and evening and it usually works.

Warm wishes


in reply to chloe40

hello Amberrose.gps have to make decisions on the spot btu it has to be the right one not an assumption.cos mine assumed I have IBS without ever actually telling me he thought that now I get labeled as having IBS even tho never complained of it symptoms and thye keep wanting to give me meds for constipation I have never had long term.if I do then it is treated with OTC meds.i have seen other gps for a second opinion .I saw a female gp recently re swallowing difficulties and at first she said she d refer me and I went back two weeks later and she wouldn't refer me.i can make online appointments and I check regularly.My practice also serves the local hospital so gps "lose a day"at the surgery cos they are on hospital duty.

the gp who diagnosed my hiatus hernia etc said his area of expertise was cancer,but it still is in my mind that cancer is mistaken fro a bowel condition.they refuse to accept that my weight gain of 3 stone (just gone up to 14 stone)is abdominal cos scales don't show where weight gain is and they don't accept when i tell them it is in one area.

I also believe it is more than my recent diagnoses cos had abdo swelling a lot longer than the conditions.

In your previous post, I mentioned that your GP should not diagnose IBS unless other things have been ruled out. A GP may well have an interest in cancer ( and so he should!) But he is not an oncologist. He is a general practitioner. If you cannot get your doc to refer you to a specialist, could you ask to be referred privately? An appointment for assessment would cost you about £100 - £140. In your case, with the anxiety you have, I would call it money well spent. You would also be seen very quickly. If you can't find the money, press your GP for a referral through the NHS.

in reply to Calceolaria

hi calceolaria

thanks for your reply,its nice to have a friendly response without people beign opininated.i have never been referred to an oncologist.there are so many conditions that cause a swollen abdomen and despite several consultations my own gp hasn't investigated them.i believe he says he cant treat anything he claims is to do with my stomach cos he knows he shoudl have investigated sooner.I could see the dr who arranged the oscopioes which revealed my recent diagnoses and ask him.going private is not an option as i cant afford it plus the nearest is in Edinburgh and not easily accessible unless you have a car.they are not in centre of town btu either on outskirts or middle of nowhere.

Are you sure you are giving the gp the right information. Sleepless nights have a habit of screwing up one's thinking processes and lead one to believe that one has described their symptoms accurately when one in fact has not. Add to this the desperation and the gp sees an irritable patient and the gp being human switches off.

Can you take someone with you who is fit and healthy to act as an advocate. The fit and healthy person can feed back to you what is happening and explain to you what they notice. The fit and healthy person can also help you get your message across.

I was at a course on expert witnesses about two weeks ago. The course facilitator said that there is controversy whether fibro exists or not. I was also at a conference where one of the speakers has been diagnosed with fibro and it was described to that person as their condition been caused by their lack of sleep.

The gp has to rely on what consultants say. If the gp has met or read reports from anti-fibro consultants the gp is going to be in different frame of mind than if the gp has met or read reports pro- fibro consultants.

One useful thing that can be done is to book a double appointment. This what I have to do when I see my gp.

Hope I was able to give some useful information to work with.

in reply to johnsmith

hello John.yes thank you.yes i always jot down what I need to ask/discuss etc .I don't often have sleepless nights just every now and again tho I do only get 5 -6 hours sleep most nights.partly cos it takes me ages to get comfy and cos as soon as I lie down I cough.then you can guarantee my Annie will wake me on the dot of 5.and keep doing so until I get up.

my surgery don't let patients have double appts .

johnsmith profile image
johnsmith in reply to

The gp surgery contract is run by NHS England. Contact them and see if they can help you resolve the issue of not being able to have a double appointment.

Chronic pain is a complex medical condition and can need 20 minutes to run though the related issues regarding how it is affecting your life and other conditions you have. Two single appointments will not do as the gp having to see a lot of patients will have forgotten much or all of what you have told him in the first appointment. Medical records on computer are a nightmare to go though to try and pick up issues that of long standing.

Try the above argument with NHS England and see what they do. The practice manager getting a phone call from them will give a response. I have had a look on google lots of gp surgeries do double appointments for patients who have complex issues.

I have in the past tried to see the GP surgery practice manager about an issue and got a very muted response. The practice manager getting a phone call from NHS England was on the phone to me within a couple of hours to resolve the long standing issue.

Hope this helps.

in reply to johnsmith

hello John.thank you.yes it does btu will have to think about it.i complained toPALS and the practice manager a while ago because my gp wasnt giving me answers,telling me "its my stomach" "wear make up" and "I dont know what it is"which are unacceptable,.i wake every morning to a swollen face and nose and he hasnt acknowledged them along with other stuff-i ahve swelling and skin rashes from head

to toe and tho treated no diagnsoses.

same here re practice manager ,first time i sat and waited for half an hour and she never came out to get me.then second time had discussion with her the outcome of which was a waste of my time cos she said "DR W wasnt like that"and "thye dont get 7 years training for nothing".i thought if thats the case if they dotn know somethign then he should refer me to someone who does.

johnsmith profile image
johnsmith in reply to

That is why you may have a need to complain to NHS England. You have grounds for a complaint that needs resolving. The practice manager was not in the consultation with you so the practice manage has no idea how Dr W responded to you. You can point out to NHS England that you got nowhere with the practice manager.


The Patients Association Helpline – 0845 608 44 55 may be useful as a first port of call..

7 years training only covers so much of medicine. There is a lot that is not covered. The Gp would not in a numberof cases know who to refer you to. A Gp needs something specific which needs investigation in order to refer to a consultant. The Gp is very dependant on having a good reputation with their peers.

I do not know what to advise. The local MIND may be running an advocacy service. If they are they may be able to help you in your situation.

When you put in that complaint you were offered a meeting with the gp with a mediator present but you refused this. Is it worth reconsidering this as it is unlikely that you will get any further with the complaints process if you refuse potential ways of getting the answers you want.

Like Katieoxo60 comments. I have been there,done that. In other words, you definitely need to change surgery. Make a fresh start at another. I found it easier than I thought it would be. In fact I have changed surgeries 3 times whilst living at the same address and changed GP within same surgery. On that occasion, I was asked if I wanted to make a complaint and I said No. Because I knew it would make things worse for me. the one time I did complain to a hospital , made it impossible for me to get any diagnosis in my county . Took me about 6 years to get a diagnosis about 80 miles away because of that one hospital complaint.

In the meantime, I wonder if it's worth going to a drop in centre for help. There is one in my nearest town so think there must be others around the country. it's like a medical centre but you don't need an appt. But you will have to allow for waiting awhile. Best of luck. I do understand the difficulties.

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