Yep. That's me! Having got my strength more or less back after my life-threatening upper intestinal bleed last October I once again did a great family Christmas, with the same attitude I've had for the past few years i.e This'd better be good because it might be my last one. But as soon as the hoo-ha was over I contacted my Onc's secretary to ask for a scan prior to my routine 3 monthly meeting with him on 28th January. I was pretty sure something was afoot inside me, and decided to get ahead of the game, also getting a CA125 blood test via my GP, although this was gratifyingly raised only slightly from 280 to 390 - not in the thousands which I was expecting.
But three weeks ago I woke up yellow! Quite a nice mellow shade as it happens, which I convinced myself was a pleasing gold tinge and preferable to my normal very fair skin. My husband popped that balloom however, and told me I was actually a rather sickening shade of mustard! Not good. I decided to bypass my GP and spoke directly to the gastrologist who had treated me for the burst duodenal ulcer. I was told to get myself into hospital straight away. There followed an MRI scan,and a barium 'swallow' (which sounds awful but was a piece of cake). It turned out there was no obstruction in my digestive tract, but what the MRI scan showed was a mass wedged in between my liver and pancreas, which was blocking the bile duct hence the jaundice. I had to have a stent inserted to allow the build up of bile to drain directly into my intestine but once this was successfully achieved (a tricky business apparently) I immediately began to get better, although the jaundice had made me very itchy and aggravated my dormant eczema so my skin was a bit of a mess - sore and uncomfortable, but now improving as the jaundice finally clears completely.
But at this point I did not know if the cancer had migrated to my liver,or was maybe a new primary cancer so I expected the worst when I saw my Onc last Monday. But it appears to be 'just' another bit of ovarian cancer which has decided to play silly buggers and I am due to start my fifth course of chemo shortly - Caelyx this time, every 4 weeks over 6 months, the hope being that a completely new (to me) drug will prove more effective than the carbo/taxol I have had four times and which my body is no longer tolerating on a satisfactory level.
I am assured I wont lose my hair, but may be subject to mouth ulcers, a skin rash (wot I deffo do NOT need, thanks all the same) amd possibly nausea. I should be grateful for anyone's experience of Caelyx on the level that fore-warned is fore-armed.
Meanhwile it is now the countdown to my elder daughter's wedding on June 29th and I therefore have no time whatsoever to be in the slightest bit ill. I have a cake to make and decorate, wedding dress fittings to attend and a bedroom to completely redecorate so the bride has a lovely room to stay in the night before her big day. Also it is my son's 40th birthday in April and I want to make him a photograph album of his life from sweet little impish baby, followed by his 'Mowgli' phase when he was 3ish when he looked just like the lithe brown, mop-haired poppet from Disney's film, through the gap toothed school years, semi-bolshy teenage one, until 6th form when he looked like a young Tom Cruise but with long wavy dark hair. And here he is now, a grown family man of 40. Crumbs.
Also, having had one very serious health scare (burst ulcer) I have been busy finalising my affairs so that I have everything in place and can then file it away, forget about it and carry on with the business of living, although for now It's still a work in progress as it's all a bit long-winded and I have to feel in the right frame of mind to concentrate on doing it.
Memo to self. Just bloody well get it done girl, then it's one less thing to worry about.
Love to you all