No news is frustrating

Some of you may remember that I blogged a while back that I've not been feeling well and that my GP was convinced it was gall stones but my consultant was concerned it was a reoccurance.

Well my ultrasound showed lots of gallstones so I was expecting to get the results of my CT scan today and be given the all clear.

After waiting in clinic for over 5 hrs I was told that my CT scan was a bit inconclusive it showed signs that my cancer is growing slowly. There was a lesion but they are not sure if its a new or old one so they are going to review all my previous CT scans, have a meeting and I've got to go back to clinic in a month.

So I'm still waiting and putting my life on hold a little bit like don't know whether to get my hair cut as seems a bit of a wasted expense if I ended up having more chemo. However i am away for the weekend in Weston-Super-Mare

33 Replies

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  • Hi ScardyCat

    So sorry thinking of you.. Try and have a good weekend... I know it easier said than done love x G x :-)

  • Thanks Gwyn I just sometimes get fed up of the endless waiting. My diagnosis was a bit like this

  • You must be feeling really p****d off with another delay. If it was me, I would go ahead with your plans, whatever they are, you can't always live by thinking 'what if......'.

    Have a wonderful weekend. Enjoy the sunshine, scenery and some fun.

    Love Wendy xx

  • I think you are right Wendy I'll get my hair done when I get back

  • Hi I feel for you when you say your life is on hold, I feel like that and I have only just been diagnosed. I feel I cant plan things further than the end of the year. I do hope your results are good, and enjoy the weekend, hope you have good weather Love and hugs Babs x x x

  • Thanks Babs it is exactly a year since I had my surgery

  • What a b****r! Don't put off the hairdo though! Anything that makes you feel better is worth the cost and, anyway it will be a month before you get results and probably a couple of weeks after that before chemo starts and not all chemo takes your hair! My last lot did not! By then your hair will have grown and will probably need cutting again, meantime you will have had a boost and it may even have made you feel better!

    Chin up! Thinking of you!

    Margaret!

  • Ps! Let me know if you see the sea at Weston! Everytime I have been it was just mud! Like Southport! The tide goes out a long way! Have a lovely time and remember to live and enjoy every day, any other way and you have let this b disease win!

  • I've been told this and have been to Southport many times. Once the sea was under the pier :-o

  • You were lucky! Went to Southport from my home in Hoylake, regularly in my teens! Swam in the lovely open air pool but never saw the sea! LOL

  • You are right Margaret

  • Have a lovely time at the sea. As Margaret says live and enjoy every day. That is one positive thing that this disease has taught us to do.

    Love Suex

  • Have a great weekend- I have fond memories of Weston- nothing to do with the Pier or the mud! I actually saw the Beatles there! That dates me doesn't it?

    Enjoy!

    Love

    Anne

  • Did I ever say I met John Lennon, just before the Beatles made it? His first wife, Cynthia, lived next door to mybest friend at school! They were walking down Market St Hoylake, Cynthia heavily preggers with Julian, and we stopped to chat. She said this is John, I said 'Hello John' and six month's later, they were famous! Missed the boat there didn't I LOL!

  • wow that makes you nearly famous Margaret! I saw the Beatles some years later at Hammersmith Odeon. I say 'saw' who could see anything. There were just screaming fainting girls everywhere - but the atmosphere was amazing! xx Annie

  • take care of yourself and chin up xx

  • Oh Scardy

    How frustrating for you. I totally get what you say about putting your life on hold, as I have been in this position, but I have got a new attitude and that is to try and do as much stuff as I can and when I need to have chemo I will cross that bridge when I come to it. My cancer is growing slowly so I know i will need chemo in the future, just not sure when.

    So, I think that even if your doctors do decide that 'Olivia' is growing they may not necessarily want to give you chemo straight away. Hopefully your pain and feeling unwell are down to the gallstones and once they are sorted you will start to feel better.

    When I first came on here, the best bit of advice I was given was to try split time into smaller chunks and focus on short term goals. So, I agree totally with Birthday Girl Margaret, that a hair-cut will never be a waste of money because it will make you feel better. You can't beat that feeling of having just had your hair done and every time you catch yourself in the mirror, you think 'Who is this glamorous thing?....Oh, its me!' *coquettish giggles*

    Have a lovely weekend at the seaside, have an ice cream for all of us and just do anything to make this month go by as fast as possible.

    Take Care Vx

  • The waiting game is miserable! Go ahead and spoil yourself as much as you want. Can't stand the l'Oreal ads but you ARE worth it!

    Linda

  • oh dear hi i was convinced that i may have oc but i had a scan on my abdominals yesterday and had a look at my liver and ovaries and gall bladder which showed a solid gall stone and fat on my liver and also impaired glucose /diabetes which could suggest polystistic ovaries which im waiting for an internal scan to check my uterus and ovaries.Well the guy who scanned me yesterday said he couldnt see any suspicious mass and my ovaries just look small.I have huge enlarged stomach and i look like a pregnant duck with triplets lol still not convinced its all that straight forward.I 've always had problems with my hormones and have refused to take the pill for years as it makes me very moody and anyway although my periods are normal i know im not fertile and haven't been for 9years about so.

    Oh you should spoil yourself but obviously look after your diet as this makes huge difference to your outcome dont wait to change. However an occasional treat is a must though,please enjoy yourself it can make a diffence to cancer cells reproducing stastitics have been done to prove it!x

    Take Care

    Nicola x

  • Hi Nicola

    I am so glad you haven't got OC but don't beat yourself about making a fuss as a gall stone is so painful I had that once and have had my gall bladder removed... It is the worse pain you can have believe me ...

    Love x G x :-)

  • Hi thanks yes i know i had some grit 15 years ago my god that was painful and this is a big one but drinking 5 litres of water can get rid of it or shrink it to pass it wish me lol.Ive completely changed my diet and that will help for the future but they i have diabetes still got to deal with this stomach otherwise things wont improve properly but i know water is a great healer!Im just waiting for other scan i am going to get them to check my bowels to be on the safe side seeming as i have had problems with digesting food and having all the enzymes on need which can lead types of cancer if not produced properly.Ive been doing some research.Enzymes are essential to kill cancer cells!

    I got all this from the internet including that raw food veg and fruit produce the enzyme you need where as cooked doesnt produce it when you eat it!

    THank you xxx

  • Hi Scardycat

    A month seems a long wait especially if you don't feel well.Heres hoping that it is gallstones causing the problem.

    A new haircut will definitely lift your spirits.Just had mine cut today and I 'm really pleased with it.

    Also , even if you do need chemo you won't necessarily lose your hair. I've just had platinum only and kept all mine.2 years ago I had platinum and caelyx, didn't lose my hair then either.

    I hope you have a lovely weekend.

    Hugs,

    Juliex

  • I wasn't sure If they would give me carboplatin again worried about having taxol

  • Dear ScardyCat,

    The first thing is to enjoy Weston. Don't forget to send me a wave to me across the muddy Severn Estuary to Cardiff. It's a great idea to get away and try to put it to the back of your mind if you possibly do that. I just hope those gall stones don't give you too much discomfort.

    I agree with the others. Treat yourself to a hair cut. I only had carbo-platin and didn't lose my hair but had prepared for taxol and had organised a short-back and sides for myself which I regretted as I never lost my hair.

    We're all sending loads of love and good wishes. Hoping you have a lovely weekend and post us a bit of cheering news.

    Take care. xxx Annie

  • Hi Scardycat.

    The waiting around that we all have to do is always the worst thing isn't it? While we're waiting for the clinicians to get conclusive information, our minds go into overdrive thinking the worst is about to happen.

    I would get my hair cut. Live your life as though with the glass half full and enjoy your weekend in Weston super mare and go for a run along the beach.

    if the cancer is back, you're just gonna have to bend with that wind when it happens - but don't waste this day, this moment worrying about tomorrow. Remember 'life is a gift, that's why they call it the present'...........and remember that we're all with you whatever happens.

    love

    Eleni x

  • Thanks Eleni I was thinking about you as I was changing buses in Bristol. I'm going to get my hair cut. I've also had phones calls today from my GP and my CNS but of course I was traveling back to Manchester. Now I'm dying to know what they've got to say

  • Just a bit of an update got an appointment to get my hair cut on Thursday. I spoke to my CNS today and they will be discussing my case next Wednesday at MDT seems I might be being considered for more surgery. My next clinic appointment is not until 02/08 so CNS will try to update me by phone otherwise I'll ring her next week and start hassling for an earlier appointment.

  • Oh my CA125 has fallen from 69 to 65 over 3 weeks

  • Hi Scardy

    Sorry, I think I've missed something here. Surgery? Is this for the gallstones, or have they now decided that this is definitely a recurrence? ... or something completely different.

    Vx

  • No this is for the cancer my case is being discusser next Wednesday at MDT which includes the surgeons that did my original hysterectomy. The CT scan was inconclusive so I'm not sure if they are thinking of going in and having a look I get the feeling they do think its a reoccurence - my diagnosis was a bit like this. Don't worry I'm confused.com as well. Maybe if they do decided to do more surgery they can take my gall bladder out at the same time????

  • Oh dear, they don't seem to be able to make their minds up what they are going to do, do they? Not helpful for you. Hopefully CNS will keep you up to speed and keep the worry to a minimum.

    Vx

  • They found a lesion at the top of my vagina. Now there was something there after my surgery last year at the start of chemo but my the end of chemo its had gone so they thought it was a haemotoma not it seems to be back

  • Well the oncologists are based at The Christie and the surgeons at St Mary's. I don't really wan to have to wait until 02/08 to find out what is happening. They could still decided they don't need to do anything at the moment

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