I've been crying a lot during chemo : Since I've... - My Ovacome

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I've been crying a lot during chemo

Spiritdaughter profile image
14 Replies

Since I've undergone a full hysterectomy, I started chemo in August. I've had times of the month, similar to pms. I've been crying a lot, and can't cope with questions and generally teasing me about my emotional instability... Taking jokes too personally, and literally crying for three days straight.

Sometimes I even experience anger outbursts and tantrums like a child.

I don't know is there a way to stop this, without taking medication.

I'm doing soft yoga everyday, and meditation, reading, but I still have my emotions all over the place.

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Spiritdaughter profile image
Spiritdaughter
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14 Replies
Mammi profile image
Mammi

Same & I’m post menopause & 5 months post chemo so no excuses 😂 .Think we gather up all our strength to get through this trying time but the emotions have to release at some stage. I even went to say something lovely to my hubby the other day & ended up blubbering 💦Let the tears flow then do some calm deep breathing and then laugh, you are allowed to, you are one strong woman coping well. Sending big hugs Dee x

Lyndy profile image
Lyndy

I think you have to think about how much you are going through just now.... it’s just huge. Your hormones are reeling, your body is being poisoned and your mind must be struggling to keep up. Often you can get access to counselling or other complementary activity for wellbeing... ask your chemo unit.. mine has a Macmillan centre just next door. It might be that doing something like this can help you make sense of it all and give you safe ways to vent. xx

lesleysage profile image
lesleysage

Hello, you sound very normal and healthy to me., but I'm certainly not a professional in these matters, just someone who was totally shocked at my diagnosis, surgery and chemos and did as you are doing with yoga, pilates, meditation and know I began to recognised my 'dark side/feelings' as well as those moments I so valued and cherished life. I also wrote a journal; I'd never written a diary but found a spiral bound book and pen was such a valuable friend in which to jot all sorts of things down on what was now in my life and absorbing so much energy.

My GP eventually gave me the best advice I've had, "grow healthy cells, that's your job and leave the killing of the b----rs to we medics; the healthier the body you bring us the more choices we have for treatments." To grow healthy cells, he said, eat well, exercise well and rest well. Mindfulness helped me - and my husband too - he uses Headspace and I use this too but also did a course Be Mindful Online, which is now a recommended NHS App, I think.

Above all, please don't beat yourself up - just notice the power these awful happenings in life have and hold steady for your balanced self to assimulate them into your life and loves as you move forward.

Warmest wishes, L x

Newbie_2020 profile image
Newbie_2020

You have entered a very early menopause due to the full hysterectomy. This alone will trigger an emotional roller-coaster. Chemo as well has a negative impact on the emotional well-being.

Your body and your mind have been through a great deal and it may be a while before things settle down.

In spite of all of that you are also doing all the right things.

Ruebacelle profile image
Ruebacelle

wow am so sorry sounds as if you are on a roller coaster. Do you have access to a support group and or therapist ... recommend escapw literature and telly. Sending you calming thoughts from france

mizpurple profile image
mizpurple

Your emotional state is very familiar to me! Even now, 4 years on and with a reasonably good outcome, my emotions seem to lie very close to the surface. I think it's a combination of hormonal changes and facing the realization that the life I had planned for myself has been totally upended by this disease and its treatment. There is now an underlying uncertainty to everything that just persists - it's one thing to know intellectually that so many things are beyond our control and another to experience it at a cellular level. When will the other shoe drop? Others have provided good advice about mindfulness, yoga and meditation techniques. I have found it useful to work toward small goals and seek to set my life in better order. But basically, grant yourself a lot of grace as you go through this time. Wishing you all the best! Deb in Colorado

SUE7777 profile image
SUE7777

Hi Spiritdaughter,

I'm really sorry you are feeling like this is all your fault. It isn't! You've been through a hell of an ordeal and are still going through it. People should be trying to understand and help not tease and make jokes, I'm upset this is happening you sound like your doing all the right things to me. The only thing I would suggest is you have a word with these people and let them know how your feeling maybe at a time when your not feeling so low, you could also have a problem with lack of hormones due to the op. so discuss it with your Nurse and ONC . Huge hugs. Sue xx

Katmal-UK profile image
Katmal-UK

Awww I am sorry you are feeling like this, I remember well being like that. You will feel better but I do think you need to speak with someone. Have you been offered counselling ? It may not feel to you that's what you need but please take it from me it helps you understand why you are feeling like you are, why your emotions are all over the place. Sending you a BIG virtual hug. Kathy xx

Spiritdaughter profile image
Spiritdaughter

Thank you all a lot, I'm glad it's normal. Speaking of therapy, I'm going to try it soon.

Lots of looooove

Selena

MarleyZ profile image
MarleyZ

Think it's the norm to be emotional during chemo let it go it could be something you just need to do for now

LesleyGB profile image
LesleyGB

I am so sorry you are feeling like this. Why are people making jokes and teasing you for goodness sake? Is it to cover up their own worry about you? You are going through so much..the shock of the diagnosis, the worry, disruption to your normal life, your hormones, side effects of chemo. And then add covid into the mix! I would definitely speak to them, and also take the advice of all the others on this site who have been there themselves and come through it with support, not teasing and silly jokes. I am quite cross on your behalf!

Hope things improve soon.

Lesley x

Sw21 profile image
Sw21

You’ve had such fine advise from your teal sisters here. I went through that too. Think about it, the shock of diagnosis, the surgery, the menopause, the chemo, the uncertainty, any one of these things would put you reeling, but we have to do all of them at once. And the chemo does not only cause physical fatigue, but also mental and emotional fatigue. And the brain heals slower than the body after chemo. I’m 1 1/2 yr out and still healing. So I’d suggest try to be as gentle with yourself as you would with a dear friend, and know you’re going through something very difficult. Take care❤️

Stephanie

SASSY196 profile image
SASSY196

Hi Spirit daughter, I can't add to what the wise ladies have already said other than to say I struggled hugely emotionally so as well as doing lots of things to be kind to myself I do take medication to stabilise my mood. If it's not your thing don't use it but you may find that it really does help if you don't move forward emotionally in time. I am often so saddened by reading stories on this forum but I was particularly struck by you only being 25 years. I am so, so sorry this has happened to you xxx

Rudieems profile image
Rudieems

I literally cried like a baby all the way through it all last year. If its how you cope than let the tears fall.... you are going through so so much and its OK for you to feel this way & dont let anyone make you feel bad for doing so.... once you start to feel better the tears will subside over time. Also if you are in menopauce because of it all that plays a massive part in yr moods and how you cope... i had acupuncture and counselling towards the end it made a huge difference speak to yr doctors nurses see if anything like that is available to you xxx good luck

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