Clingy baby, what will I do

[Chiclady]

My one year and 11months old,is so clingy ,he won't let mi do anything,as am pressing my phone right now he is on me, always following me around, wants to be carried, I can't even have 30 seconds to my self. I ve tried cartoons it's not working,he ll rather be with me than watch cartoons.pls help what do I do. He won't even let his dad carry him or let alone stay for a minute with him without looking for me, crying to see me

[LawsonLion]

I hated this stage. At baby groups and stuff I’d bring a couple of toys over, sit on the floor with my back on the chairs/so I was with other parents, let him sit between my legs and play with the toys and as he got more confident, maybe bored he went a bit further away from me everytime. I made sure I stayed where he knew I was tho. I think in time he realised I wasn’t going anywhere so was happy to leave me. Now he’s at an age where he doesn’t care where I am in the house 😂

Have you tried getting him to do things like crafty things on the floor, or games where he has to touch the door, he hides something and you have to find it.

It passes, it’s just frustrating .

I’m going through a similar thing my LO is a lot younger but clingy and a cry-y baby 😫

[RachelModerator Moderator]

Hi Chiclady ,

As lawsonlion said, this is a really tricky stage to get through.

Has anything changed for him recently, or has he been unwell?

As hard as it is, the best thing you can do is go with it. Children are only able to be independent once they have learnt, time and time again, dependence, and that you are there for them. He is also going through a massive period of development, with language etc and may be finding it hard to communicate his needs as he experiences big emotions. He feels reassured by your presence and is probably also quite fascinated about the every day things you are doing. They can feel really boring to us but they are the most interesting thing in the world for your almost 2 year old.

It does not make it any easier as a parent to experience this though and can feel particularly draining when there is an endless list of tasks to be done.

Do you have any time to yourself in the evening, maybe your other half can take over with some of the things you would usually be doing so you can have half an hour to yourself when your son is in bed.

It may also be that he manages more if he is out of the house with his Dad and knows you are not in another room etc.

If if gets to much, it is important to remember he will be ok with his Dad, even if he is upset, and you may find it easier to manage with needing to be with you all the time if you are able to have a bit of a break.

I hope that helps,

Best wishes,

Rachel - Assistant Practitioner

[Babypigeon Community Ambassador]

Hi I had them same with my daughter when she was younger as I'd spent 9months of just me and her so when her dad came home for work and I wanted to go for a bath or shopping or even just sitting by myself with a cup of tea, anything on my own she would scream and cry it was heartbreaking, I agree with what everyone has said give him that confidents that you are there but at a distance. So play with toys and move Futher away. I always believe talking to your child weather you think they can understand you or not. I have proper conversation with my daughter as if she was an adult ( I've had comments in supermarkets saying she doesn't know what your saying to me that's not true commication is the most important tool we have weather they are in our bellys or in the real world. With the dad situation I try to explain that daddy was loving too and wanted to play or hug and we did a bit of tough love I would start playing with daddy and my daughter then i'd go to the toilet or to the kitchen just out the way for a few minutes then come back, We also tried to encourage her to go to daddy while I was in the room this was the tough part I wouldn't allow her to come back to me unless she went to daddy first for a hug and then the next time a hug and a kiss and then the time after that she had to go play with him. ( Don't get me wrong this was hard daddy was in tears I was in tears my daughter was too you get the picture). But now the relationship she she has with him is amazing. It can be a long process but it's keeping it simple.

Its not for everyone but at the time I wasn't sure what to do it's worked for us.

Sorry I've gone on for ages but hope this helps you.

Let us know how you get on.