I need some advice...: Hi everyone. This doesn't... - OCD Support

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I need some advice...

LegendofFif profile image
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Hi everyone. This doesn't directly have anything to do with OCD but it kind of does so here goes...

I have two friends and we've been friends for around 6-7 months and I would definitely call them my best friends but lately I've been feeling really left out and I'm not sure whether I'm genuinely being left out or if it's just me being silly. One of them is getting married and the other one is her chief bridesmaid and when I was asked to be bridesmaid, the bride simply said "you can be a bridesmaid if you want" as if she had to make me a bridesmaid else it'd be awkward.

They always do things without me and sometimes OCD can get in the way of plans but I feel like they don't understand how much it affects my social life. It's not like a phobia where if I go outside and face it, I will be cured. I'm still waiting on OCD specific therapy so I'm not even sure how to even tackle it on my own yet.

We have a Facebook group chat and they'll talk about things between the two of them and I won't even be involved.

The thing that really got me feeling left out was last night, one of them messaged in the group chat saying she was on her way to pick up the other girl. I didn't read these messages until the morning and asked where they went...even though they had read the message I got no response. I went on Snapchat and one of the girls had posted that she had to go to hospital last night. I assumed that was where they went last night and I felt concerned for my friend so messaged again asking if she was ok and if everything was sorted. I got no response. Then, the one that didn't go to hospital messaged something completely irrelevant which I thought was really weird so not only did I respond to her message but I also asked again where they went last night. I still have no response even though they have read my message.

I'm not really sure what to do so I hope someone here can give me some guidance, thank you :)

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Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins

That sounds really horrible. These so-called 'friends' are behaving as if they were about thirteen. They need to grow up. It can be difficult being in a trio of friends, as one can get left out, but it sounds like they are completely insensitive to you.

Try talking to them, if you want to continue to be their friend. Tell them how isolating and restricting OCD can be, and also that you feel like surplus to requirements around them. Perhaps they don't realize how you feel.

But they don't have to be your only friends. There are a lot of nice people around who I'm sure would really appreciate your friendship. It can be hard to make new friends, but you can do it. Try to be as upfront about the OCD as you can, as real friends will make allowances, as you do for their problems! And then you can have the satisfaction of letting these two stew in their own juice while you are enjoying yourself with much nicer people!

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