The New Me! - Bit like the old me, but better I think!

Yoo hoo. I am at it again!

Yes it's me. Just a thought or two.

Every day that passes I feel like I am getting things clearer in my head. I even had a little panic yesterday and I thought - this isn't right I don't hurt anywhere.

What if I haven't got RA anymore, or even had it in the first place, or perhaps it's not RA it's something else. Oh my god that means I shall have to go back to picking up eggs and running around with sheep and cows - argghhhh... I was just getting used to keeping up to date accounts and a tidy office. Having time to cook a meal (indeed even feeling like cooking a meal is a novelty!) I am enjoying have time for things I didn't before. I actually manage to get the washing hung up and dry. Before when I was working on the farm, I used to sometimes put it out and then because I wasn't around when it rained it would get wet again. Then the washing would be stuck on the line for days, and everyone would run out of clean underwear, and oh my goodness it used to get on me wick!

I feel I have changed so much in the last few months, my outlook on life, my daily routine, my attitude to things that I used to think were important but realise now they are not.

What is even better is that if I can't do something now, I don't feel guilty about asking them to do it for me. They know if I can do something I will, so are now quite willing to help when they can see me in a pickle!

My daughter does all her own washing any ways, but it is a novelty to see son and heir bring his mucky old clothes down for washing. I nearly fainted the other day when he did that! Life is so much better when you are part of a team.

Then I realised, that actually, I have been such a control freak, that I probably in the past haven't let people help me, thinking I was invincible and no-one does it better than me!! What a bumptious old ****hole I used to be!

I am still looking around for something to do to earn money - not sure what exactly or where, or how, but I feel positive and feel that something will come my way when I need it.... fingers crossed.

Good news too, the group of RA-ers I used to meet up with at the RA Ed sessions organised by our OT department, have decided to keep in touch. So once a month or every six weeks we are going to meet up to do stuff. On the cards is a trip to the hydro pool - which you can hire privately at the hospital. Also a trip to a new coffee bar, which is situated on an old barge in a local town, and someone else has muted a day trip to Lundy Island! At least if we are all together will shall be a force to be reckoned with and the support will be tremendous. So I am feeling very very lucky.

So you see I am not going to have time to pick up eggs - dear. Mr Silageman and Son and Heir are getting on really well, under my astute guidance and supervision mind you. We have sorted out the accountant and have a meeting with a farm consultant within the next couple of weeks, to see how best to move forward.

The accountants already help us with our Tax Credit situation and have said they will look into helping and getting together the DLA application. It sounds strange but these are accountants like you have never met before. They work closely with big farming families, and although farming has to be a viable business these days, they are still a way of life, and so they see the business full of people and not just economic ideas and investments etc etc.... Most of the employees are from farming families.

So things are still on the up..... be positive my friends, and stay positive.

Ooer my thumb and wrist are giving me gip and I have an appointment to have an injection in the joint on Wednesday, which will hopefully kick that into touch for a while.

I shall take my leave and battle on with "sorting out the office". Had RSPCA inspection yesterday and we have a Lion Code self-audit inspection next Thursday which will include a Raising the Awareness inspection on behalf of Waitrose, so got to keep the paperwork up to date!

Tara for now.

Julie xxx

[LavendarLady]

Hi Julie, glad to see you are up and running again. Lovely photo - you look so relaxed. My shoulder is playing up again following dog training. Have e mailed my consultant's secretary to find out if he has written to the GP about physio yet. Glad to see things are on the up for you vis a vis the farm. Sounds as if you are very busy at present so don't over do things otherwise you will set yourself back again. Wish I was closer but Cornwall is over 300 miles from me - could fancy a trip across to Lundy Island.

Love LavendarLady (Dottie) xx

[Hidden]

Hi Dottie. Yes I am definitely feeling better. I still get sharp stabbing pains in my arm from the top of my shoulder down my arm if I don't behave myself!. I am having physio at the hydro with it and also doing muscle strengthening exercises

which is doing the trick. The sooner you can get started of them the better by the sound of it.

I am definitely pacing myself. I sound busy, but I am doing it all at my own pace.

It is a bit of a trek down here, especially coming across country from where you are. But if you ever find yourself venturing this way, you are more than welcome to visit!

Lundy does look inviting - I can see the sea from where I live (it's a stand on the toilet on one leg type of view!). The chickens have a better view from their field.

The farmhouse looks out the other way towards Dartmoor, which you can see on a clear day.

Take care me dear and hopefully you will get some physio sorted soon.

Julie xxx

[LavendarLady]

Hi Julie, It sounds absolutely idyllic. Even standing on the toiler I can't see the sea from my house but can from the top of Knights Hill which is our highest piece of ground round here - lovely views in both directions. If I am ever down your way will let you know and drop in for a coffee. Likewise, if you are ever up in Norfolk, let me know and I'll put the kettle on. LavendarLady xx

[Hidden in reply to LavendarLady]

Your on Dottie x

[sylvi]

Hi JUlie,

its a lovely photo of you and yes its nice to hear things are on the up for you, long may it continue. I know what you mean about being a control freak i'm the same, but i too have had to let things go, which i don't like, but the work will be there long after i'm dead. Thats what my mum used to say. She would be so upset at whats been going on in my life. I just glad she didn't live to see it, i know that sounds awful but i don't think she would manage with me being like this. I've been happily married for 28yrs today and i couldn't have managed without my hubby bob. The man deserves a medal as do all our men who help look after us and the girls.

Sylvia.xx

[Hidden]

Hi Sylvi. Letting got has been one of the hardest things to do. The place is an absolute tip most days. But I am finding things starting to be tidied up and moved and it's like others have just realised that they can do stuff too - and I can let them!

I know what you mean, about mums. Mine would have been the same, if she knew how I was. When I had a slightly positive RF factor a few years ago, she was beside herself, and was always asking what she could do to help. I wasn't half as bad as I am now. God rest her soul.

Glad you have a good man Sylvi - take care

Julie xxx

[Hidden]

Hi Julie

Just wondering whether you and your fwllow RA'ers have thought about setting up a local NRAS support group? NRAS will give you loads of help and support.

Love Jeanxx

[Hidden]

Hi Jean - Well I had the idea of doing this. We have found out that actually there is a support group in North Devon called rheumers and we are all going to trundle along to the next meeting in October to see how things are done. They have, apparently, been going to some years, it just wonder why on earth I have never been told about them until now! They are not very high profile.

So I shall see. Thanks for the offer of help and support

Julie xxx

[Hidden]

Hi Julie - "the new me" looks good - gosh you are busy - i think you sound so upbeat and cheerful.

I am the freaky controller of the house as well. My girls are programmed to come to me with any problem, be it hunger, homework or clean clothes and i am not sure that will ever change! I have trained them not to trust their father's fashion sense (you should see some of the stuff that he has pulled out for them to wear) and i would be scathing of other duties that he has performed over the years. So i guess i have created the situation and do i really want to let it go?

Anyway you sound in great form.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Hi Mads - thank you. Just commented on your blog. Don't know how you do it. My mum always said- you are making a rod foryour own back.... ok she was right :-).

Julie xx