Entering day 15.......?

[nsd_user663_57734]

Hi everyone. Haven't posted for a while because ive been so busy.

Well i'm still smokefree and finishing up day 14. Still feel quite strong but having the odd thoughts of smoking. To be honet i'm missing the little breaks of smoking and the whole something to look forward too, but i'm not missing the effect smoking had on my health. i.e. breathing, chesty, taste, smell etc. I am just missing the 'something' to do part of smoking a cig but obviously the health reasons out weigh that. That is what is stopping me from smoking.

I still haven't really drank any alcohol or been out socialising much. I'm quite anxious about going 'out' out. I'm actually not looking forward to being out and been a non smoker. I'm actually scared i might get too tipsy one night and think sod it. I'm not gonna lie. I dont think that now but i know what i'm like once ive had a drink. I was meant to go out last friday with work but didn't because i couldn't really be bothered. But there are 2 nights i have planned in june (a festival) and july (a rave) both of which there wil be alcohol flowing and i will be with smokers. I feel like being a non smoker is just really boring, very sensible but very ****** boring.

I know i'm still me but i definitely feel a part of me has been lost. Like some things just dont seem appealing anymore because there is not a cig at the end of it.......sad right? I had a good cry earlier in my bedroom away from the family. I bought some running trainers to start excercising, maybe running and another de-stress activity maybe yoga or ty chi. I really need to deal with my stress it gets to me bad some days. I have mood swings and times of sadness.

All in all i do feel good, proud and healthier already and dont think i will reach for a cig because i have my mind around my addicition, what it means and some ways of coping but still it doesn't change that whole thing of being a smoker and feeling that i want to smoke but know i cant or shouldn't......oh gosh not making sense now i know just needed a little release i suppose.

Oh and my mum is doing well with her quit and my bestie is quitting in a couple of months she says so will be able to help and support them.

Hope you are all well xxx

[nsd_user663_56237]

Hi everyone. Haven't posted for a while because ive been so busy.

Well i'm still smokefree and finishing up day 14. Still feel quite strong but having the odd thoughts of smoking. To be honet i'm missing the little breaks of smoking and the whole something to look forward too, but i'm not missing the effect smoking had on my health. i.e. breathing, chesty, taste, smell etc. I am just missing the 'something' to do part of smoking a cig but obviously the health reasons out weigh that. That is what is stopping me from smoking.

I still haven't really drank any alcohol or been out socialising much. I'm quite anxious about going 'out' out. I'm actually not looking forward to being out and been a non smoker. I'm actually scared i might get too tipsy one night and think sod it. I'm not gonna lie. I dont think that now but i know what i'm like once ive had a drink. I was meant to go out last friday with work but didn't because i couldn't really be bothered. But there are 2 nights i have planned in june (a festival) and july (a rave) both of which there wil be alcohol flowing and i will be with smokers. I feel like being a non smoker is just really boring, very sensible but very ****** boring.

I know i'm still me but i definitely feel a part of me has been lost. Like some things just dont seem appealing anymore because there is not a cig at the end of it.......sad right? I had a good cry earlier in my bedroom away from the family. I bought some running trainers to start excercising, maybe running and another de-stress activity maybe yoga or ty chi. I really need to deal with my stress it gets to me bad some days. I have mood swings and times of sadness.

All in all i do feel good, proud and healthier already and dont think i will reach for a cig because i have my mind around my addicition, what it means and some ways of coping but still it doesn't change that whole thing of being a smoker and feeling that i want to smoke but know i cant or shouldn't......oh gosh not making sense now i know just needed a little release i suppose.

Oh and my mum is doing well with her quit and my bestie is quitting in a couple of months she says so will be able to help and support them.

Hope you are all well xxx

Hey LadyK

I'm really sorry that you're not feeling the social benefit of your quit. Honestly, I feel no different to being a smoker when I'm out with friends, apart from not stinking at the end of the night and not waking up with that horrible feeling in my chest!

To begin with I took my e-cig out with me. I wouldn't recommend it, as I know that they're easy to become hooked on and you're doing so well without, but it gave me that "social" aspect back. It wasn't long though until I realised that I DO have non-smoker drinking buddies who hang out in the same pub. So I was using it less and less, until one night I forgot to charge it and it ran out of battery!! :eek: I did panic, because I was quite tipsy and was out with smokers, but it honestly didn't bother me after that.

So now I don't have anything to take out with me on a night out. I had a works night out on Friday and was actually stood outside with the smokers for most of the night because there was a band on inside that I didn't want to listen to! They were all asking me advice on how to stop and I heard the word "envy" being thrown around a couple of times too! :rolleyes:

If you're struggling to enjoy yourself on a night out and you feel that you're boring, I'd say there's something wrong here. You can survive the night out without smoking AND have lots of fun.

How about taking some chewing gum/lollipops out with you on your nights out for now? Or making sure that you stick together with other non-smokers, rather than the smokers?

At the beginning I would just try to control my alcohol intake and make sure I was no more than happy tipsy. Just to take away the risk factor.

It is more difficult in the early days, but if you can get yourself through the nights out with alcohol and no smokes, you will learn to have just as much fun as you would usually. If you hibernate then you will really struggle in the future.

It's definately normal to feel like something is missing from your life. Believe me, this will pass! You feel lost for a while and, at times, it's the only thing on your mind. For the first few weeks quite a few of my friends commented on me being quieter and more withdrawn than usual. But, once you've become more comfortable in your quit, these feelings start to ebb away.

Please stick with this hun. You're doing great! You just need to break through that doubt of yourself and stay positive! x

[nsd_user663_56237]

Oh and exercise will do you the world of good hun. It will release some of that pent up stress and it will make you happier as well x

[nsd_user663_54332]

What Sarah said!!

Honestly, after a night out how rubbish did you feel?

If you're anything like me then your mouth felt horrible, your throat hadn't forgiven you and you had a cough - you won't get that any more hun and hangovers aren't nearly as bad!!

There's nothing boring about not smoking, and anyway all smokers on one level or another want to stop - like Sarah said they will envy you!!

Go a bit steady on the booze to start with 'cos it can make fags look attractive *but* they're not!! Don't feel any different now to when I smoked and if I can do it, you can

[nsd_user663_22435]

WOOHOO!!! Well done, you. I do know what you mean & it seems so damn silly that we miss something that was so bad for us. I still feel that but I try to ignore it....admittedly, I'm going through my book supply at a rate of knots as that stops me thinking about it...but hope that the loss will be easier to deal with. Well done to your mum!

[nsd_user663_57734]

Hey sophie & everyone thanks a lot for the good advice. I will try not drink as much as i normally do but thats easier said then done!

Gosh i'm having the biggest crave right now. How the hell this is still getting me i dont know. My mouth is literally watering for a smoke right now! God this is taking everything i got!!!!!! Arghhhh i wana scream. So so so baddddddd. I really want to have a cig, & another & another & another. I'm so thick! I'm sick to death of feeling like this & the hold that smoking has over me. I just want to wipe my mind out, my past of smoking i wish would ****** disappear!

[nsd_user663_54332]

Hey sophie & everyone thanks a lot for the good advice. I will try not drink as much as i normally do but thats easier said then done!

Gosh i'm having the biggest crave right now. How the hell this is still getting me i dont know. My mouth is literally watering for a smoke right now! God this is taking everything i got!!!!!! Arghhhh i wana scream. So so so baddddddd. I really want to have a cig, & another & another & another. I'm so thick! I'm sick to death of feeling like this & the hold that smoking has over me. I just want to wipe my mind out, my past of smoking i wish would ****** disappear!

Hang in there hun, get through this and the hold gets weaker

Honestly, I had times I took myself off to my car and literally shouted "I want a fag" over and over like a little kid throwing a tantrum, but thise days are long gone

Can you go for a run, play loud music, stupid games? anything really to get your mind off smoking!!

[nsd_user663_57734]

I just blooming hate that smoking is always somewhere lurking in my mind. I cant get rid of it. I remember i stopped before for 3 months and it never left me then. I always fancied one. Say if this is what its gonna be like forever!!! Always thinking of stupid fags. I wanted to go for a run but hubby is out kids in bed i couldn't probably have one anyway i'm jus suffering stupid poxy thoughts!

[nsd_user663_54332]

I just blooming hate that smoking is always somewhere lurking in my mind. I cant get rid of it. I remember i stopped before for 3 months and it never left me then. I always fancied one. Say if this is what its gonna be like forever!!! Always thinking of stupid fags. I wanted to go for a run but hubby is out kids in bed i couldn't probably have one anyway i'm jus suffering stupid poxy thoughts!

It's annoying, I know

For what it's worth, in my 18 month quit I got to a place where I never thought about smoking - up to just before I caved, actually and loads of long term quitters on here say they never think about smoking any more. It *really does* get better!!

[nsd_user663_57734]

Thanks Gemma-Lou. I think i'm through that feeling now. Isn't it scary though to think that as quitters we are never 'safe'? Or are we? You said you started again after 18mths and Kat has quit twice before for 3 years!!!! I just hate that mental fight. Like in 10 years from now will i be sitting there one day and just get a crave for a smoke????

How many people start again after so long? I talked myself out my last quit because i thought well i'll be a smoker again in the future so why go through this now? Not a good mindset i know that totally but i cant help these thoughts coming into my head. I dont want to be vulberable all the time!

[nsd_user663_54332]

Thanks Gemma-Lou. I think i'm through that feeling now. Isn't it scary though to think that as quitters we are never 'safe'? Or are we? You said you started again after 18mths and Kat has quit twice before for 3 years!!!! I just hate that mental fight. Like in 10 years from now will i be sitting there one day and just get a crave for a smoke????

How many people start again after so long? I talked myself out my last quit because i thought well i'll be a smoker again in the future so why go through this now? Not a good mindset i know that totally but i cant help these thoughts coming into my head. I dont want to be vulberable all the time!

I'm glad you're getting through it hun

Um, i think it comes down to how you see cigarettes really. Last time I quit it wasn't because I wanted to, I enjoyed smoking and saw ciggies as a nice thing and a treat. Had a row, didn't care any more and smoked just to stick 2 fingers up basically.

If you see cigarettes for what they really are then you won't be likely to cave, because you realise how rubbish they are.

But really don't worry about it, one of my friends quit 5 years ago now, and she says she gets the odd fancy for a fag but won't have one and doesn't crave them

[nsd_user663_57546]

Hang in there. Youre doing great. I know things can seem a bit empty without a fag but just remind yourself that the only reason it used to feel such a great "reward" was because you were feeding the withdrawal/your addiction. Think of all the non-smokers at festivals and raves...Im sure they still have a great (unboring) time without smoking??

Dont let your brain trick you into thinking there was ANYTHING good, rewarding or positive that come from smoking cos there wasnt.

Stay strong...youre doing a great thing!!

[nsd_user663_57605]

Thanks Gemma-Lou. I think i'm through that feeling now. Isn't it scary though to think that as quitters we are never 'safe'? Or are we? You said you started again after 18mths and Kat has quit twice before for 3 years!!!! I just hate that mental fight. Like in 10 years from now will i be sitting there one day and just get a crave for a smoke????

How many people start again after so long? I talked myself out my last quit because i thought well i'll be a smoker again in the future so why go through this now? Not a good mindset i know that totally but i cant help these thoughts coming into my head. I dont want to be vulberable all the time!

LadyK - I have the same exact fear. EXACTLY.

[nsd_user663_22435]

I just blooming hate that smoking is always somewhere lurking in my mind. I cant get rid of it. I remember i stopped before for 3 months and it never left me then. I always fancied one. Say if this is what its gonna be like forever!!! Always thinking of stupid fags. I wanted to go for a run but hubby is out kids in bed i couldn't probably have one anyway i'm jus suffering stupid poxy thoughts!

That passes...it does, honestly. Even though I went back to it after 3 years before, I remember the odd pang. Funny, I turned to my husband yesterday & said that I'd only just realised I was 3 weeks clear so I have stopped thinking of cigs every day. I'm still getting craves but find some yogic breathing helps them go away (it also makes me very lightheaded, lol)

[nsd_user663_54332]

Don't panic Kim! I haven't quit twice before, I have tried more than once, but have only had one quit of any duration which was, as you say, for three years. And I didn't start again because I was craving, I did the same, stupid thing that so many of us do, I thought I could just "social smoke" - what an IDIOT!!!:mad::mad::mad: The constant battle WILL go away, I promise, you just have to remember when it does to continually keep your guard up and that NOPE means NOPE:

Not

One

Puff

Ever!

That's how I ended up as a full time smoker again too.

Had another 18 fags after smoking a couple to stick my fingers up (for some reason I almost never bought 10's) and thought I could "treat myself" because after 18 months I "wouldn't be an addict any more" - which was rubbish.

It's not that you spend the rest of your life craving, you just have to make sure you don't smoke again - and beware of the "just one" trap.