Stressed out and p****d off completely - No Smoking Day

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Stressed out and p****d off completely

nsd_user663_4964 profile image
27 Replies

Today I was supposed to have ANOTHER grievance hearing about stupid idiot ************ lots of swear words, bully boss, who is defrauding the company and trying to sack me so he can employ a girl of his nationality ( I only know this as a colleague told me he'd told him this- otherwise i would just be in the dark as to why i am being threatened with disciplinaries for having name badge upside down and equally trivial, fabricated, set up and ridiculous reasons )

First g hearing was with the equally horrid DM , who completely covered whole thing up, breached ****loads of company policies and the grievance handling policies , did not interview two witnesses and manipulated hearing so i had no colleague with me (tho to be fair, didn't really think i needed a witness as at NO point have i ever done anything wrong) Then twisted every single thing i said and dismissed all points of my grievance , and at the end of said letter implied i was racist and had said racist things in the hearing (I loathe racism and prejudice of any sort)

Had to convince DMS boss at the appeal to reinvestigate (complained about her terrible behaviour too) Had colleague who'd seen stuff as a witness .

Supposed to be being reinvestigated today by independent manager (well as independent as you can get in that he still works for the company)_

Called off due to snow (to be fair , not his fault)

Idiot ******* boss leaves msg on my phone that some cash i've taken is missing!!! Doesn't answer when i ring back..... When i finally get hold of him , cash has been found wedged into back of safe.....

SO angry

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nsd_user663_4964
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27 Replies
nsd_user663_6570 profile image
nsd_user663_6570

I hope ranting on here helps..... at times e get so mad and have no where to take it.or get frustrated or sad........ good we can come here and let odd steam...

looks like ur in a bad sitution work wise. red tape and policy at times is shite.

i understand...... us it as a way to keep focused and not let the F***s at work get u down.

bed and training program to read for my stressed cats for me. Others think I am stupid but I dont and cig money will pay for the therapist to give them a better life.

Do not smoke.... Thats what they want, you and union rep outside discussing and fagging.....

be proud Jude xxx

nsd_user663_5920 profile image
nsd_user663_5920

Hey Jude

Contact ACAS as soon as your able. Situations like this in most work environments are hard to handle alone. Yr employer should now confirm in writing to you the outcome of the meeting and give you a time within which to respond/disagree etc and the time they give has to be deemed as reasonable.

You need some legal advice here, contact ACAS or a body like it.

Don't let the barstewards break your resolve

Pol x

nsd_user663_2040 profile image
nsd_user663_2040

Jude

Wow you are p*ssed....

Whatever way you look at this you aint going to have a career there any longer...get out and speak to a lawyer about constructive dismissal

Stay strong and I hope things get better real soon.

xx

nsd_user663_7235 profile image
nsd_user663_7235

I'm for once lost for words and don't really know what to tell you Jude.

Don't give in fight tooth and nail all the way. I had a pupil go trhough a similar thing although there was nothing racial involved. It was a big insurance company and she was having the same harrasment problems just because she was living in loggings in her bosses house. Her boss also female was not happy when she move out. While she lived there her money was going missing 200 cigs went missing and when she asked her boss about this she said I'll give you the money for them later. Of course this never happened and it was the start of the harrasment. To cut a long story short she did not give in and although she eventually left her job because of this she kept fighting it and with a lawer involved the company then agreed her boss was out to get her and she ended up getting a tidy sum of money because she had been forced out of her job.

I hope it don't come to that for you, if you do go don't go quietly.

I thought I was lost for words hmm

Jack

nsd_user663_7235 profile image
nsd_user663_7235

One other thing Jude get witnesses please.

Jack xx

nsd_user663_4964 profile image
nsd_user663_4964

Sorry i was slightly having a rant there! I meant to add on to this that it was really the first time in this 3 months :mad:i had been mega mega tempted to smoke....just because i was soo furious .....I am really very angry and i really want to smoke at this moment!!!!

It's just the idea that he could (and would) say that i had not podded some cash. And then had me furious because i thought he was gonna set me up about that too- he has already done stuff like take things out of rooms (i work in a hotel) and when i missed the thing he took out according to "brand standard checklist" said he was gonna give me disciplinary......:rolleyes: (And lets face it Who can prove that i have or haven't podded the cash? only him) ? Only that i have already complained re his dishonesty and bullying, and have been there for 5 years with really good appraisals)

Thanx tigger , Pol , Jack, Lorna for ur replies....

I have already been to ACAS- you have to exhaust your employers grievance procedures. Done the whole grievance , appeal against outcome o grievance thing, been goin on for a year now..... You have to complete your (sh*t) employers grievance procedures before you have any legal standing and are even entitled to take it to a tribunal..... If you are even still fully capable of working with the ******or even at all by the end of this it will be amazing.....

Am really lucky to have one or two guys who are prepared to stand up as a witness for me so am hoping now i have "independent" grievance hearing that they will be interviewed ....kinda dragging one along cos he hates him too...

God, I'm sooo tempted (more than ever before) to smoke, but i won't... I hope....really really want one

nsd_user663_6090 profile image
nsd_user663_6090

oooh jude you re doing so brilliantly !! I can hear youre angry but dont let this wreck your quit ! youll be so cross with yourself if you do. you ve done so much for people on here

hugs louise

nsd_user663_7235 profile image
nsd_user663_7235

He ruining everything else but this one you can control. Don't let him make you smoke or he's winnimg something else.

Jack xx

nsd_user663_3728 profile image
nsd_user663_3728

Hi Jude :)

I'm so sorry you're still having to put up with this c**p with your so called employers

This has been ongoing for so long now

Hang on tight to your quit don't let them drive you back to smoking and keep fighting them

Sorry never having been in this position I am unable to advice you on what to maybe do next

Love and a Hug

Marg xx

nsd_user663_6165 profile image
nsd_user663_6165

Oh Jude you poor sod - this is appalling. Don't smoke. Instead take a days' holiday and go to see an employment lawyer. Yes, you have to exhaust your employers greivance procedure before going to a tribunal but there are protections in place to stop employers abusing this by dragging out greivances in an unfair manner. You don't have to put up with this crap and I am soooo angry on your behalf.:mad:

nsd_user663_6596 profile image
nsd_user663_6596

So sorry to hear of the mess that your in..

My advice is to

Contact your Union (if you have one)

Make a detailed diary of everything that has been said to this point, including dates/times and by whom.

Get work colleagues on side and if possible ask them to advise that they have not had interview consultation.

Contact Citizens Advice for employment advice, or take advantage of the first hour free at some solicitors... you can then advise that you have take legal advise on your standing,,, this may cause them to back off.

Good Luck, I hope it all works out... most importantly document everything! whether you think its vital or not, if it does get to a tribunal stage then it'll be a saviour

xx

nsd_user663_4964 profile image
nsd_user663_4964

Hey guys- didn't smoke!!! Yay Something about rage as an emotion makes you want to smoke!

Sorry bout this, further ranting on its way.....

I have ten pages of bullying incidents, plus i actually have names of customers where he's pocketed early check in cash, and copies of timesheets of his friend that are filled out fraudulently (its hard to explain , but if you saw it you'd know what i mean- I suspect that any extra payroll he pays to his friend, who pays it back to him. He's also done stuff like dock someone elses pay for not answering the phone, again i imagine does the same) Evil DM could not actually believe how much evidence i had, so how it's been covered up i don't know. She is actually worse than him,and by exposing her complete cover up and manipulation of the situation, and allowing him to stay there doing all these things i hope i've landed her in it too.

I'm actually now wondering if he's been told to bully me and another lady out of our jobs to avoid making us redundant, as i think they want to bring in an assistant manager , but there is probably not enough payroll budget. (I have worked this out from something underhand they did last year by changing all our contracts to less hours) I know they want her out and have reduced her hours (they found a mistake she had made and used that as an excuse) and mine by lying to me about what my hours would be.But he has his own agenda in wanting to employ people he knows.

Wish i was member of union, but don't think you can just join one and start using them in the midst of problems like this. Will go to CAB soon, have had some legal advice already - The consructive dismissal is very hard to prove (been doing my law research too) you have to prove they have seriously breached your contract , in a way which means tou have no other option but to leave. Also that means you have to walk out of your paid job, to nothing, as if you have another job it doesn't count .Presumably providing me with a safe and fair working environment free of bulling and race and sex discrimination is an implied term in my contract, but you have to prove you had no other option but to leave.

I do have a little bit of hope left that this guy is gonna do something, and Evil DMs boss seemed appalled at what she'd done...No letter to notify me, interrogation and leading questions at interview.Not letting me see notes. BuT not getting hopes up.

Part of me does just want to resign if this does not go welll (My life will be further made a misery by him) but feisty part of me refuses to be bullied out of my job in the current economic climate- but is it better to leave before i am unfairly dismissed......?Which i'm thinking is going to happen.

nsd_user663_5972 profile image
nsd_user663_5972

OMG Jude that is teririble them treating you like that but don't smoke - I know it's difficult but down't let the bastewards grind you down.

Like Zoozie said you have to keep a diary and document everything.

I would definitly get to a solicitor that spe******es in employment law.

If you have a union rep then use him that is of course if your company recognises the union.

Do you have representation/witness in these meetings? If not you are entitled to that you can take another employee in with you if you like.

You need to get copies of the companie's policies e.g. bullying policy and employee handbook.

I know I shouldn't say this but if it gets too bad look for other work and leave and take the company to a tribunual on the grounds of consrtuctive dismissal.

I'm no expert but I have to deal with emploment law issues from time to time in my job so I hope it helps you a bit.

Whatever you do DONT SMOKE - why should you do give in becasue of idiots like them.

xx

nsd_user663_4964 profile image
nsd_user663_4964

Grievance hearing tomorrow (dependent on snow)

Hopefully, mercifully it will finally be taken seriously.....

nsd_user663_6165 profile image
nsd_user663_6165

Good luck for today Jude

nsd_user663_5972 profile image
nsd_user663_5972

Yes good luck for today, stay stong xx

nsd_user663_6810 profile image
nsd_user663_6810

Good luck Jude,

And now you pat yourself on the back for getting through this without a ciggie. A ciggie will not change your situation one bit but when we are stressed its familiarity we look for I suppose.

Hope it goes ok for you

nsd_user663_5325 profile image
nsd_user663_5325

Hey Jude, sorry to hear about your problems. Stick to your guns and your principles. Don't let this moron win. I don't know how these things are handled in the UK but in the US retaliation for this sort of thing is not allowed and in fact as a manager myself I know that after this kind of incident employers shy away from firing someone involved in something like this because they don't want to be accused of retaliation.Articulate yourself well and don't hesitate in your answers. Good luck man.

nsd_user663_7469 profile image
nsd_user663_7469

Dont let them win in the smoking stakes else you become the one to lose all roads

ACAS is brill advice and any meetings take some one with you and if you cant ask for it to be postponed till you can everything has to be written depending how long they have employed you for they have a very strict code to follow and if they dont then you have them there as well

Good Luck and deep breaths

I’m really glad that now I’ve quit

Cause in the past I’ve smoked some sh**

Smelly Hair Hands and Breath

Shorter Life but longer Death

Up the hills you’ve got no puff

Smokers cough that makes you rough

So pass each day without the weed

Cause only then will you succeed

So Bravo to all that now don’t smoke

Cause early Death is sure no Joke

nsd_user663_4964 profile image
nsd_user663_4964

Went much better than the first grievance hearing- the bloke seemed nice enough. But i don't think they are ever gonna find or admit and evidence of any discrimination or bullying or wrong recruitment procedures- they are not going to admit any of that or it will make the company liable. The most i can hope for is to get a few hours back (in their hope i will not go to a tribunal) , and hope there's enough evidence of the fraud to get him that way!! I am not really expecting anything-that way i will not be disappointed.

Still really want to smoke and am having to fight off the just one packet, just for tonight thoughts...

nsd_user663_4847 profile image
nsd_user663_4847

Glad things went better Jude, as to having smoke, why, you got through today without one, now it's time to relax.

If you think a fag will relax you it won't - it never did all it did was satisfy the nicotine craving for 20mins before starting the next build up for the next fag. You're prob not addicted anymore so having that one fag won't give you the feeling of relief your looking for and as for a pack they prob won't either - it won't be that moment of ahhhhhhhh until you are hooked again and then your back into the quit cycle - and it wasn't fun the other times what makes you think this will be any different.

M

nsd_user663_6734 profile image
nsd_user663_6734

Hi Jude.

Glad things are getting better for you.

But please don't think about smoking. It's the dreaded ""I'll only have one"" syndrom. One will lead to two etc etc.

You have done so well my somerset buddy.:)

Speak soon

Ju x

jackieinv profile image
jackieinv

Big Well Done to you, all that stress and you didn't smoke, shows we certainly can live without them. The reason you are thinking about them is because we used to smoke in times of stress and this is a time you are reminded of them but you do not need them.

Wishing you good luck with your work situation, believe in yourself, you will win through.

Jackie

nsd_user663_3282 profile image
nsd_user663_3282

Went much better than the first grievance hearing- the bloke seemed nice enough. But i don't think they are ever gonna find or admit and evidence of any discrimination or bullying or wrong recruitment procedures- they are not going to admit any of that or it will make the company liable. The most i can hope for is to get a few hours back (in their hope i will not go to a tribunal) , and hope there's enough evidence of the fraud to get him that way!! I am not really expecting anything-that way i will not be disappointed.

Still really want to smoke and am having to fight off the just one packet, just for tonight thoughts...

Hey Jude :)

Cheers for the update....I worry, don't you know ;)

It really is amazing that you have quit ciggys against the backdrop of all these shenanigans at work. As you know I've been aware of that for a while now....jeez, they drag it out, don't they. That's just the necessary evil of it all, I guess.

That aside the biggest focus is that you are doing INCREDIBLY well with not smoking. Time was you'd have lasted...well you wouldn't have. So, take some pride in that and add it to the stockpile of success that is starting to make a sizeable heap around you.

Keep the faith,

Cav x

nsd_user663_4964 profile image
nsd_user663_4964

Thanks everyone for the replies- Bad boss has told me ( in between continual criticisms) that he is having to go and work somewhere else soon (How soon? Not soon enough....)

I didn't smoke though- the non smoking god is testing me to the limit. MAH you are right, if i did it would not have helped (why would i even think this?) and I wouldn't even have enjoyed it....

nsd_user663_4754 profile image
nsd_user663_4754

well done Jude for staying so strong in the face of all this. tough times but you are tougher ;)

nsd_user663_4964 profile image
nsd_user663_4964

LOL

Think i bl**dy deserve some dosh after all this Chrissie.....No, I hadn't ever really thought about it getting as far as a tribunal and dunno if i want anymore stress tbh (Plus i have no money for the law required) I was just thinking bout resigning cos it really is so hard to take- Think the company realise i have a good case though, so aimed a few " I don't want to be forced to resign from my job" and " I've been advised to exhaust all the company grievance procedures" into the grievance hearing. So they can just worry about me resigning constuctively dismissing myself due to their evilness.

Also think that even if he goes, someone new will be made aware of the whole thing, and everything i do will be checked to within inches and some reason found to be on my case..

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