For the hundredth time!

Hi there - I'm new here so thought I'd introduce myself :)

I'm 44 years old, 5ft 8 and weigh 20st.

My whole life I've been a serial dieter. I think I must have tried every diet out there pretty much. I often do really well on them - losing 4 or 5 stone - but then something will trip me up and I'll be back to square one and ending up higher in weight than I started! I know it's a lot to do with my head. No matter how much I lose I struggle to 'like myself' and also turn to food in any/all moments of anxiety not really noticing what I eat just stuffing and stuffing until I stop feeling whatever I'm feeling.

I'm married with two young and very active kids and I'm pretty active too. I used to run (which I loved) until I knackered my Achilles' tendons so it's walking I stick to now - really doesn't have the same effect for me though.

I'm feeling pretty desperate to loose weight if I'm honest but more importantly I'm desperate to stop having such an awful relationship with food. I know completely what a healthy diet is but find it difficult to control my need for bread, cheese and butter when I'm I'm feeling low (half a loaf of bread, half a tub of butter and half a block of cheese would not be unheard of when I'm in a hating me moment, which are pretty cyclical - hate me, eat loads, hate me more for eating loads, eat loads more etc etc).

Anyway enough of that! I want to change my story. I don't want to be the fat one anymore. I want to feel happy riding a bike and a horse again, happy to by clothes, happy to eat in public and be there for my kids as they grow and I'm hoping this place can help me work out how to get there :)

Lots of love

Fxx

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5 Replies

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  • Morning Frantic1

    Welcome to the weight loss forum.

    Have a look at the "New year Amnesty" in the Pinned post section on the right or at the bottom if your on a mobile, it will help you get into the right mind set to start your weight loss journey.

    Take a look at the Welcome Newbie post in the Pinned post section at the right hand side or at the bottom if your on a mobile. Have a look at the nhs 12 week plan, many members have had success following this plan. Use the BMI checker to work out your daily calorie allowance.

    Below the Pinned posts are the Topics where members share a range of weight related subjects.

    Take your measurements at the start together with a photo so you can see the changes on the days the scales don't move.

    We have daily weigh ins so why not come along and join us. You can find the weigh ins on the Home page in the Events section on the right. Just click on the post in Events and record your start weight and any loss/gain or maintain for the week.

    To get the most of the forum be active, share tips, recipes and experiences. Read some of the posts they are very motivating.

    Have a good first week.

    Rose

  • Hello and welcome Frantic1 😊

    You have made that first difficult step So well done 😊

    Have a good look around the forum and please just ask if you have any questions

  • Hi, we have a lot in common, same age, height and on January 2nd I weighed 20 stone as well. Only difference is I have never lost weight until I started in September (most I had lost before was a stone). I got fat at uni and then stayed the same for 20 years.

    You can do this, you need to make changes that are sustainable so you don't feel you are on a diet you are just eating healthily for you. The 12 week plan is great, full of useful stuff. The forum is amazing.

    For me I go cold turkey and cut out all refined carbs. I find if I have a bit I want more. I eat fruit, veg, meat, fish and eggs. I make exceptions for Christmas and holidays. So far it's working. I am now 17 stone 11. (Just came back from holiday, put 5 on, lost 2 already as it was mainly water.)

    You can do this! Good luck, keep posting🤞

  • Hi Frantic, I've been there with the bread and cheese....would eat it in secret to pretend it didn't happen. The only way I can lose weight is the same as Elland, to cut it all out completely. Tough to start with, it's a new way of living/eating. I gave up alcohol on Jan 1st, and haven't had any since, no longer even think about it. Tomorrow, I'm starting with other sugars....

    Good luck, you'll get great support on this forum xx

  • Hi Frantic1,

    I recognise a lot of the things you describe about losing weight and putting on more than you started off with again and again and again. Just thought you'd like to know that I've done things a bit differently this time and have lost a fair amount of weight, but more importantly, it seems to be staying off and I wondered if any of my experiences might help you.

    Firstly I was advised to check out my calorie range on the NHS BMI calculator and I was allowed more calories than on any previous diet, yet I've lost more weight and felt better. Apparently if we reduce our calories too drastically then our metabolism slows to conserve energy and we end up needing less and less food to keep us going. When we stop dieting, our bodies fight us by changing our hormone levels to make us feel more hungry and to make us eat more before we feel full. In short, our body fights us for every ounce that we lose so it's got nothing to do with our lack of willpower!

    Secondly I don't have a goal weight as such; I just wanted to lose a couple of stone and keep it off. The goal was to keep off any weight I managed to lose, even if it was a tiny bit . I'd always stuck at 14st before and even on very restricted calories, couldn't get beyond this sticking point and I found that the only time I ever felt I'd succeeded was when I'd reached this magic weight and then, to be honest, I didn't know what to do next and it all started to creep back on again. This time, in my own eyes, I've been a pretty mega- successful person for the last three and a half stone (I've gone down from 16st to 10st 7lb).

    I think the most positive sign for me is that my eating pattern is very stable and has withstood some pretty severe testing when it comes to stress levels over the last few months to the point where I turn to exercise (also walking) rather than food to de-stress. If I do have more than usual to eat on a particular day I'm very conscious that it's just a day and when I look at the big picture I've done pretty darn well so I don't feel bad about myself these days and it has helped a good deal to stay positive.

    The other thing I've done differently this time is to give up added sugar pretty much completely because I can't cope with having just a bit now and again and all of the cravings have gone so it's worked for me, but I know many people don't need to do this.

    I love cheese and crusty bread too (and pickles) and in fact that's what I'm having for tea tonight but I buy single rolls so can't overdo the butter which is spread onto it either, and stick to about 2-3 ounce of cheese but eat a whole plateful of salad and pickles!

    I think finding a pattern of eating and calorie intake which you can maintain in the long term and exercise that you enjoy rather than endure is a big help.

    Good luck and I hope you can get back to your running before too long x

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