Put your old self in the naughty corner!

[Dave1961]

Someone logged a post a few hours ago, talking about how she had something from the "bad" foods list and was feeling guilty.

In a subsequent comment she indicated how she felt that one wrong step down the bad food road could mean caving in and willpower evaporating.

I was exactly like this last night. I got home from work at about 9:30 p.m. The cravings for chocolate AND chips had started around 8:00 p.m. and it took a truck load of willpower to just get home without stopping.

I was SO close to just pulling into the supermarket and buying some...a LOT of junk food.

Seriously THE worst cravings I have had - I almost got on here to S.O.S. for help!

But I got home, still thinking "Arrgghhh I want chocolate, I want chips arrrgghhhh" and no matter what I just couldn't seem to get it out of my head.

"Gimme, gimme, gimmeeeeeee" was all I could hear and it was driving me mad.

That empty pit in my stomach crying out to be fed. I had dinner only 2 hours before mind you! I am probably eating less than I should so I finally decided to have a piece of rye toast with a poached egg to see if that would shut that voice up....yeah... nope

I was just sitting there thinking about the crunch of the crisps and the luscious creamy chocolate mouth feel - I was SO SO close to just getting in the car and going to get them.

I couldn't understand why after 2 weeks of being REALLY on my game as far as food was concerned these cravings were just...and thats when it hit me!

This was EXACTLY the same as when I quit smoking.

It was as I was starting my 3rd week that suddenly the cravings for a cigarette exploded and there is a term for this that some smokers use.

The WTF Week. When you quit smoking the 3rd week is often the worst as cravings start yelling and it makes no sense - why after 14 days would you suddenly crave something?

it looks like it may apply to giving up fat food as well?

We are creatures of habit and we are not really designed to accept change quickly. When we change our lifestyle or eating so quickly sometimes our old self gets left behind.

Change is hard and scary and its fear thats often at the root of these things. Fear if change, fear of failure, fear of discomfort or trying something new.

And our old self gets snotty and shirty and unhappy - basically it's our 4 year old tantruming little self coming out because our OLD self can no longer have what it wants. I think this can often explain people's grouchiness as they quit smoking or go on a diet.

I guess it has something to do with the sort of 21 days to form or break a habit rule.

It's our old self kicking us in the shins and sobbing and screaming and using every emotional blackmail trick in the book in its last ditch efforts to get what it wants because it knows the end maybe near.

As soon as I thought of the craving like a petulant whiny tantruming child and knew that simply ignoring it would shut it up and that this wouldn't last ... that it was just the remnants of bad habits trying to drag me back down in that hole I knew it would be OK.

And almost immediately the cravings started to disappear.

I still want a chocolate or chips in the back of my mind but its a passing thought and its now manageable for me...lets see how tonight goes! lol

I really want to wait for 4 weeks minimum before I try anything in my "banned" foods list. . At that stage I think my willpower will be strong enough to have a taste without needing the whole block or bag.

So if like me you are having that start-of-your-lifestyle-change-WTF-week just know its your inner child having a cranky childish tantruming fit at you.

Mentally put your old self in the naughty corner and be firm.

It'll eventually run out of steam, snuggle up in a little ball and fall asleep

[Hidden]

Dave I love your posts.. I need to recognise the inner child tantruming when I am refusing to get off my backside and walk!

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to Hidden]

Yup - its the same kid!

[Fran182716]

What a great analogy!! - I'm visualising a stroppy teenage self!

[Candystripe]

Good on you. A shining example of willpower & determination. Take a gold star!

[nanashon]

So true!! Yesterday at work they were selling cakes and chocolates and i didnt go near it....however on way home from

Work I was then craving choc so stopped bought some, ate it ALL and then I had biscuits after dinner and crisps at supper time...I really need to get a grip!! 😭

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to nanashon]

Hey I totally get it. Once the kid starts screaming you just seem to lose all control. Last night I DID end up giving in to the kid after 3 days of crying for junk and bought a huge block of chocolate and a bag of crisps. I got in the car and pulled open the crisps and shoved a few in my mouth and chewed, waiting for that delicious wonderful soothing fat to hit. And it was hmmmm OK. The kid shut up and I threw out half the crisps. Got home opened the chocolate and by that stage the crying had reduced to a couple of sobs

I threw out 2/3 of the chocolate and poured sesame oil on it in the bin (why I could not have picked a CHEAP oil I will never know LOL) before I could change my mind and I REALLY enjoyed the last 100 gms of chocolate.

Hopefully no more yelling for awhile and I may even start to treat myself once a week.

[nanashon in reply to Dave1961]

The slightest bit of stress and its so easy to reach for comfort foods!! Busy day and a headache so just had some dairymilk chocolate with my cuppa!! I need to get my willpower back 👍

[andrewleeone]

And then you need to look after Him!

[alex7ra]

I have been "on a diet" for months and months now. I definitely find that the times I get cravings are few and far between and that I naturally reach for healthy snacks even when I am out. However I still find that if I have a small amount of something bad I want to finish the whole lot. I have a small amount very rarely but it does still tend to lead to binging. The trouble with that sort of food is that it has stuff in it (sugar normally) that makes us want more and more. Good luck on your journey Dave, it does get easier but it's a constant battle

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to alex7ra]

I totally get what you mean. I caved last night and bought a bag of crisps and a BIG block of chocolate but ended up throwing out of half the crisps and 2/3 of the chocolate! The reality of the junk was less delicious than the fantasy I had built up denying myself lol

[Hidden]

You should become a motivational speaker Dave !

[Alison185]

For me it's triggers that will start a craving. They are usually certain places, certain people or certain emotions or a combination of all three. For example going shopping in a large supermarket when I'm tired or stressed with a friend that might be trying to sabotage my weight loss.....If I become aware of my triggers, I can start to plan and manage them....OK I might not manage it 100% of the time but I have become mindful of my triggers....

[Jenever in reply to Alison185]

You know the saying Alison185..."Know yourself to improve yourself"

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to Alison185]

I get it. That supermarket I managed is my trigger. Its 2 minutes form home and its where I used to stop almost EVERY night for junk to eat on the couch when I got home.

There is an acronym you may have heard of - HALT - which stands for Hungry, Angry/Anxious , Lonely and Tired - and before you do anything drastic you should assess if you are any of these and HALT.

[Beccylove]

Love love love your posts... They always hit the nail on the head and I find myself sitting here nodding in agreement.

Well done for abstaining.

[Hidden]

Wow, this is willpower. Keeping thinking and thinking through a problem til you find a solution. Then really sticking to following the solution through until the problem goes away. Your strategies sound absolutely ace

[suzelle]

This is sooome! Thank you finally someone else has that voice. No matter how I try to ignore it, I cant sleep until I have what it wants. It is my downfall and only happens at night. I can be awesome all day then it starts. I have decided to tell myself Friday you can have it Friday. It worked one night. I am going to try again tonight.

Your post was excellent btw.

Suzelle

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to suzelle]

Isn't it nice to know that I (or you) are the not the only ones who go through this internal WAR so often?

And the thing is as soon as the internal arguments or justifications start (just one piece, its too cold to walk) we KNOW in our heart that we are just trying to justify wrong behavior but that little kid is a loud little bugger!

[feelinggood]

Great Dave well done! I deal with my cravings like a light switch and just flick them off! My Daughters left an opened packet of giant chocolate buttons on the top of the stairs which I can easily walk past, yes I could have one but I know if I did have one it would be one after another until the lot had gone! So I don't bother. If after 4 weeks you say you try something off the banned food list, think first do you really want it? I myself are not going to chance one bite or tiny square to put me 20 weeks back where I started! Does my body need loads of sugar and fat? Now ask me to walk past the fruit bowl or miss my gym session then I would be a proper drama Queen! lol

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to feelinggood]

I can't wait to be at that stage. I DID end up caving but I binned half the crisps and 2/3 of the chocolate by the time I got home so it was only a small break out - 300 cals over my daily goal - and I feel MUCH more in control.

Maybe I should allow myself a little expensive chocolate treat once a week.

And yes I understand about the drama queen re: exercise. My knee is topping me from power walking at the moment and NOW that kid is having a tantrum about that! He's bipolar I tell ya.

[Elissy 3kg]

As always, Dave, humour, inspiration and determination!!!!

So love your posts in the morning, they really give me that boost for the day and often put into words what we are all going through😊!!!

Thank you soooo much and keep going !!!

Elissy

[Jenever]

Great post Dave...as usual. Loving the picture too, I'm going to put it on the fridge door!

[Carolee13]

Dave you are so wise and down-to-earth. Thanks so much for sharing this, you're so right. Have you ever read a book called 'The Chimp Paradox'. It describes your habitual instinctive brain as being like a chimp that needs careful handling, much like your tantrumming toddler idea.

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to Carolee13]

No I haven't but its now on my list to get for my next vacation

[sueper]

Hi Dave. I like the idea of seeing your cravings as a child having a tantrum I would say it took me about 3 months to crack the cravings but I found planning a weekly indulgence helped. I would tell myself I could wait for Friday evening for my treat and mostly I managed it. I still do this now but the daily cravings have massively subsided.

I hope you can keep that child under control until the serious cravings have vanished

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to sueper]

Last night I DID cave and bought a bag or crisps and a big block of chocolate. I was SO excited to taste that wonderful dreamy fatty junkiness but about halfway through the crisps I realised my fantasy of the taste and the reality were two different things. Threw the rest out, binned 2/3 of the chocolate and I am now taking your advice and allowing myself a treat once a week.

Maybe some VERY expense chocolate truffle - just a few that I can let sit on my tongue and slowly melt away

[sueper in reply to Dave1961]

Hi Dave, I think keeping things at home is ok of you have the willpower to resist - amazingly I do (who knew).

I don't now worry about paying more for food such as 2 doughnuts for £1 instead of 5 or cutting a muffin in half and throwing one half away. It is so indoctrinated in us not to waste food or money that we end up destroying our health instead - madness.

Enjoy your once a week treat and hopefully it will keep your naughty inner child happy

[Zest Healthy BMI]

Hi Dave,

Enjoyed reading your post. I am so glad you didn't succumb to those temptations last night. Well done for managing those feelings and coming through!

I also use the strategy that Sueper mentioned, which is to 'allow' myself a couple of treats on the weekends - the treat is usually a packet of crisps (a 40g bag), and I also might have a strawberry tart. I look forward to both those things, but interesting that sometimes I find I don't actually feel as if I need to have them - (although that doesn't happen that often). But what I'm saying is that cravings definitely do subside.

I also enjoy a piece of chocolate (just 1 small square) every day after my coffee, and again, I really savour that and look forward to it!

Hope your day is going ok so far, and wishing you a great week.

Lowcal

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to Zest]

Thanks Lowcal

The kid won in the end but the fantasy of the taste and deliciousness of the crisps and the chocolate nowhere near matched the reality and threw out most of the chocolate and half the crips. Only went over my daily goal by 300 cals which is fine by me as I have been under all week and feeling much more in control

[Chris76]

Blinking heck Dave and there was me thinking I'm the only person who gets off the scale cravings like that!! Sunday evening was the sweet food craving which was me off to the shop followed by 6 very big cookies and a pint of chocolate milkshake with a cookie blended up in it!! Yep, Monday I felt as rough as a badgers backside and very depressed about it all.

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to Chris76]

Go dno after 3 days of denying myself every time I went past that shop the noise was deafening - I was getting really worked up by it. It just makes us feel SO out of control doesn't it?

[Hidden]

Dave, I am laughing and wiping away tears from doing so!! Love, love, love this post. For the record, I think my inner child is really plural - at least triplets, and by golly they know how to throw an almighty paddy at times, lol. 😊

[Dave1961 25kg in reply to Hidden]

Hell yes! LOL

After 3 nights of wailing and screaming as I drove by the shop I finally had no strength left last night and I caved in and bought chocolate and crisps. I was just imagining the beautiful fatty, deliciousness of the chips and burst the bag open in the car.

By the time I got home with a mouth full of crisps I was underwhelmed and threw the rest out.

I then ditched 2/3 of the chocolate and slowly slowly ate the rest and the kid wad finally quiet after 3 days.

I think maybe I had just pushed it too far and I need to start giving myself a LITTLE treat every week - 3 or 4 delicious very expensive chocolate truffles maybe