Hello friends again. I'm supposed to be doing work but I can't. I feel I need to make a decision now regarding what to do about my treatment.
I have been seeing this therapist for about 6 months. So far she is the only therapist I've seen that could diagnose me with OCD and do ERP with me. However I feel that progress is slow, lately I start to doubt if it is even helping. However I had some time to reflect last night, and after reading around I realised I have much work to do regarding my OCD. I realise I have to put in the work, but I have not been putting in much work. We have been trying to do exposure scripts, but the ones formulated during sessions don't seem to elicit much anxiety. So I wrote one on my own last night that really dug my worst fears, but I am afraid to read it out. I fear I will start to 'believe' the script or I can't handle the anxiety. I feel like I should review this script with my therapist first before trying to use it. But my next session is a week from now, I worry that I am wasting time now. I feel I need to act now and get better. But I worry if I use the script now I cannot handle it. I am afraid of making the wrong move. Or, I could call and try to see if I can bring forward my appmt. I don't know. There are so many choices that I could make I don't know what to do now I just want to recover and get better