Will I become desensitised to real events due to therapy techniques ?

[BrmhmR]

I have been dealing with harmful intrusive thoughts for 2 years and only last month have I been introduced to the concept of harm OCD as a reason for it. Since then, I have been doing a lot of research and practice in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Mindfullness and meditation which has significantly reduced the frequency of thoughts and helped me to get back into enjoying life a little more. The intrusive thoughts come now and again still and I know I must resist doing compulsions.

A big question I'm asking myself now is, with therapy techniques such as OCD scripting and the goal of getting habituated to the triggers by keeping the anxiety going while resisting compulsions, will I respond properly to real life events? For example, if I witnessed a collision between a person and vehicle. With my anxiety not as present as it was before to certain triggers, I now worry about not having that anxiety to real life events that should cause distress.

I'm aware OCD attacks you while you recover by making you doubt the treatment you are doing and whether it is right for you. I've heard that recovering means anxiety will be reduced and to be prepared to accept a new challenge in doubting whether you should have anxiety. But I would like some clarity on the question I have if anyone could help.

Thank you.

[IStillHaveHope]

Hello. That's a really interesting question. I do think though that your observation of thinking that it's OCD causing you to doubt the treatment is correct though. OCD is a tricky beast and will make you doubt everything. When starting treatment it is common for the OCD themes to "move" from topic to topic. It's just how our brains are wired. I read once that OCD isn't a "thinking" problem but a "feeling" problem. It's not the topic that's matters but the feeling associated with it. If the thoughts didn't bother us then we wouldn't have OCD!

As for the desensitizing question, there is no "proper" way to respond to a real event. I've found that treatment has made me more resilient to emergencies. I think it may be a sort of silver lining of having OCD. We have to deal with things most people do not and these experiences, though troubling, can be great teachers. I've found that when emergencies happen I'm better able to step back from my emotions, analyze the situation, and act with purpose. I don't panic as much as others. Does that mean I'm desensitized? Maybe, but I think that way of acting is far better than acting "properly" and panicking.

Remember that OCD attacks what we value most. Because of this I can reasonably guess that you're a very kind hearted person and care a great deal about the suffering of others. You don't want to have your heart closed off to the world. I think though, that having OCD and being in therapy has made me MORE empathetic to others. You know what pain and suffering are and you seek to help out those who are experiencing it.

Sorry if I rambled a bit. Those are just some thoughts I have about your post. Good luck my friend and God bless.

[BrmhmR in reply to IStillHaveHope]

Hey don't worry about the length, I appreciate your response and what you said. It makes sense to me and hopefully those who come across this chat. I guess it's how some people would say for instance " oh I'd be amazing in a fight " but if it ever came to the real event, you have adrenaline taking over, fear and a lot of pressure which may make you panic and not perform as you thought you would, even if you are trained to fight. So thoughts about how we react to a theoretical future event or if we would react properly is very different to the reaction we would have if that event actually happened.

I like how you have changed your perspective on your reduced anxiety to situations. While everyone is panicking, you can perform suitably to save someone or something in an emergency. I guess that is one aspect we should aim for in helping ourselves out of OCD loops - change our perspective on thoughts and ourselves.

Thank you again for your response.

[avoidingthebadthings in reply to BrmhmR]

It's great that you are learning to reduce the anxiety in general. I haven't found that therapy has changed my essential "self." I still react to major events like accidents and sudden injury in the same way. Therapy and medication haven't changed the amount of empathy that I feel towards people who are suddenly in need of help. If anything, I think it makes you stronger, more decisive, and more able to think and act clearly in the moment. When that adrenaline kicks in, you don't freeze as much with indecision. You can see a way through the situation and the steps that can be taken that will help the most.

I think there's a lot of negative talk in the media about therapy and medication that says people will have their personalities changed forever. That's not really ever the case, unless one is heavily sedated due to psychosis. Therapy and medication help you become more comfortable living with your mind and body. They loosen you up so you aren't stuck in harmful patterns with no way out. You don't lose parts of yourself. You just learn to live a bit differently by strengthening the good stuff.