fear of not being able to feel something, fear comes true

[anonymous_on_here]

I got scared that I would stop being able to feel compassion, and this resulted in me not being able to feel it sometimes (which was stressful to me and sometimes still is). Trying to feel it doesn't work. Also I had a fear that I would stop liking music, and that resulted in me not liking it anymore. Trying to like it didn't work. This has also happened with thinking people are attractive. It has come and gone away before, and it went away because when I saw someone, I didn't worry about not being able to think they were attractive, and I didn't try to make myself think they were attractive. But this time, it's not working. Have you experienced this or something similar? And do you have any advice? Thank you

[psychcoffee]

I dont know if this would help, but I've experienced this before and what I did was tried to make sense out of it. It did help give me a different insight which as a result made me feel better. Have you tried talking to a professional about this? Hope you'll feel better soon!

[anonymous_on_here in reply to psychcoffee]

How did you try to make sense out of it?

I've talked about it to my therapist, but I don't know if she can help

And thank you

[psychcoffee in reply to anonymous_on_here]

I did some research about it and tried to be as open as I can to any possible answers/reasons. What I did find out is that this, is not an unusual feeling and that feeling guilty about it is normal. What made me feel better at first was knowing that I'm not the only one who's experienced this. After that, I kept on reminding myself to try and practice being empathetic and compassionate which is easier said that done but it has helped me a lot. I would sometimes put reminders in my phone's notepad so that I won't forget.

[anonymous_on_here in reply to psychcoffee]

Ok I'll try that, thanks

[nkotbjoeymc]

Music keep’s me going.

[cokomo]

Yes! Especially when it comes to obsessing about my emotional responses. For example, I've obsessed about not being attracted to my partner, which then comes true. Or I've obsessed about how much I care about someone or something. The more I scrutinize, the less emotion there seems to be. It's becomes a cycle of self-fulfilling prophecies and self-confirmation. I've found exposure therapy to be immensely helpful for this. And I tend to focus more on what I do than what I feel. In regards to compassion, my internal monologue may looking something like, "Do I really even care about this person/situation? Well, I'm going to lend a helping hand, so I'm not going to get too hung up on exactly how I feel because trying to sort that out will be like opening Pandora's box."

Best of luck!

[anonymous_on_here in reply to cokomo]

Yeah I think if we don't worry about it and don't try to make ourselves feel anything, then eventually it'll get better

Thanks