This is my first post. I’d introduce myself, but I’m exhausted from OCD tonight.
Bottom line: I have a cold sore. For most people, no biggie. For me? Catastrophic. I feel as if I can’t do ANYTHING without surgical gloves and endless rounds of overzealous hand-washing rituals that consume so much time and back pain I break out in a massive sweat. I can’t touch my face. I can’t sleep on my stomach for fear of rubbing the cold sore on my pillow and, as a result, it possibly getting in my eye. And because I can’t sleep on my stomach, I’m not getting any decent rest. I feel like I can’t function. And now my new obsession is my fingers! I found out it can spread not just to your lower region or to your eye... but to your fingers, too! I have cuts on my arm from dry skin (due to so much washing) I worry about, too. This is so severe, I just don’t know what else to do but ask if anyone here has any advice or something similar that they deal with? I want rest.
Just a bit before anyone starts suggesting things: I’ve been diagnosed since fourth grade—I’m now 33-years old—and know all the back-and-forths about OCD. I could write a handbook. I know all about ERP, counseling, and take medicine every day.
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brdwybaby
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I am truly sorry for you ongoing struggles. I can relate to some of them, but not the intensity that you experience. For years I had to deal with a constant stream of cold sores, sore throast, sinus infections, hay fever, and other bacterial related issues. It drove me crazy!!! Almost five years ago I experienced a traumatic heart related event of which I am still recovering. That on served to intensify my previous issues including OCD/ASD throwing in a few new deals. What I have learned to do is to not fight against the OCD/ASD issues, but to adjust to what I can affect. I use a neti pot daily, rinse my mouth with antiseptic wash keeping my mouth and upper respiratory areas clear. No more sores, infections, etc. I use ointments, creams, and lotions on my body paying particular attention to my face and hands (finger tips). Meditation is a great help as well. There is a rather long list of other adjustments I have made to my lifestyle, but won't go into them all here. The one recent notable addition is daily consumption of CBD oil products, helps calm the constant chaos going on inside my head. I know that I will never be rid of the OCD/ASD issues, but making the adjustments that I have has made my life a bit more tolerable. I wish you the best of luck going forward.
Hi babe. So very sorry for your pain.. I agree to consider CBD as it has also helped my young son with his OCD and anxiety. Lots of physical exercise and engagement helps too. Mindfulness for OCD is a nice book. Sending you love and strength please keep us posted. You are safe here.
If you know about ERP and fear of infecting other parts, then you know what to do. Forget about the cold sore, lie on the side of the bed that you want, stop hand washing and over zealous cleaning and live with the fear that something worse will happen - which of course won't because a cold sore is just a cold sore and is usually gone after a few days. This could be the start of something important for you as long as you decide that these problems aren't as big as your OCD makes them out to be. I'm not saying doing any of the above will be easy but you now have the chance to retrain your brain.
You’re absolutely 100% right. I do know the benefits of implementing ERP... I just can’t seem to bring myself to do it. With this, anyway. Every time this happens it feels like a nuclear event, and then it passes without complication and I wonder why I was so afraid.
However, the fact that I get none of the complications I worry about makes me think that’s probably because of all the obsessive rituals I went through to avoid them. Therefore, it encourages me to keep going.
Ugh sorry for your pain. As a reminder, ERP isn't about testing if the bad thing will or won't happen. It's about showing that we can cope with the uncertainty.
I can feel your pain. I also worry so much about spreading germs, bacteria, etc. If I get a simple cold I worry about infecting others. I could also benefit from any other inputs on this subject from others.
I’m so sorry to hear. I truly I feel your pain. Whenever I get anything remotely contagious, I’m terrified of infecting anyone or anything I love. It’s torture.
Unfortunately I would not slack on the OCD for cold sores. I know someone who does the same thing and the few times they did slack and got saliva in their eye and on another part of their face, and didn’t rinse it right away with soap and water , they ended up with hsv blepharitis in their eye. They also now get cheek lesions in addition to lip lesions, when before they just had it on their lip . I have seen multiple people who had the sore spread to other parts of their body because they didn’t take it seriously. Also, do not touch your lip until the scab has completely gone ; according to new research it’s still contagious at that stage . Just try not to overwash though and get cuts on your hands. moisturize right after washing
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