On Friday Stef and I drove to Stratford upon Avon to sign the tenancy agreement on our new 2 bed extra care apartment. The drive there was very pleasant but on the way home there was waves of water being thrown across the central reservation over the oncoming cars so we took it very slowly, not like some idiots who ignored the surface water and would not slow down. Also we missed the motorway closure sign for the M18 and was stuck in traffic for 2 hours not moving at all. We since found out that some poor soul had got out of his broken down car and was struck and killed by an oncoming car.
We had started packing up the house in anticipation of the move but when we got back on Saturday it was full steam ahead but by God I forgot how hard house moving is. We have lived here 14 years and didn’t realise what we had accumulated. By Monday I was totally exhausted. I hadn’t been sleeping more than 4 hours, laying awake thinking of what we had to do, but Monday I felt Ill with tiredness. I lay on the bed at 5 pm and didn’t wake until 7 the next morning. I got up, ate breakfast and started on our bedroom. Again by 8 I was fast asleep having pushing through the tiredness. I swear I will never move again after.
As soon as I pick a quote from the 3 delivery companies I have contacted and I book the moving day I will have to contact my Haematologist to transfer my notes.
I know know why they say that moving house is up there with death and divorce in the amount of stress it causes. It’s 4.50 am as I type this and I have been awake 2 hours.
If I go offline for a while you will know I am buried under a sea of boxes.
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jillydabrat
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Oh Jill, I feel for you. Moving home is tough and stressful. Try and go easy on yourself and get a sleep in the daytime if you’re not sleeping at night.Good luck with it all, it will be worth it in the end.
You have my empathy on your move Jill. I've been in my home now for 23 years after moving from a flat to 2 bedroom house and swore I'd never move again after the sheer stress of it all. At the time my dad had just died and I was married with a 18 month old toddler. Fast forward 23 years and i've been separated 7 years and the 'toddler' is all grown up and married with my 2 Grandchildren and I now live alone in a 2 bedroom house and I still wouldn't move! Your absolutely right about what they say about 'moving home' being right up there with death and divorce, actually I think divorce is less stressful!! Lol🤣🤣🤣 Tina.x🤗
Hey Jill , , hindsight is wonderful , my heart goes out to you because I'm sure many of us can relate to your situation. When we last moved I began clearing the loft space first of years of accumulated 'keep that we might need it' stuff. It took me ages and having MF at the time I was exhausted. I vowed I wouldnt clutter a loft space again or at least anything worth storing would be boxed and labelled. And where else can the Christmas Dec's go.
It is one of the most stressful experiences and I certainly don't envy you packing up 14 years plus I guess thinning out what you need to take if you have much less room in your new apartment. That alone can cause friction.
Good luck with what you have left to do and try not to over exert yourself too much. Also as Judy says try and take a power nap during the day if you can , maybe amongst all those boxes.
Chris x
PS I don't envy you that motorway journey either, sounds horrendous.
We had the wrong dogs in the back as well Chris that were very vocal with the whippet in the car next door. A year ago I cleared out the box room that was my craft room. I never realised what a craft hoarder I was. I had so much wool and because I was selling it during lockdown people went crazy for it and I raised a thousand pounds selling most of it, I still had 3 black bin liners of baby wool left that I didn’t want to take to the new flat and this time, because there was no lockdown, I only got a tenner for it. The thousand pounds went to purchase a very gorgeous bed for the guest room and it’s been slept in twice. Oh for the powers of hindsight. That has to go to auction now with the bedroom suite and all the white goods except the fridge and washing machine. Got to admit I have sat and cried with the enormity of the task and tiredness. I said to Stef, I am looking forward to the new, gorgeous flat but when the movers have dropped the last box off and we shut the door I am just going to think “Oh s**t, where do we start????
Our loft was like yours but the very ignorant workmen who had to do wiring up there decided to throw everything in every direction. I was expecting his foot to come through the ceiling any time.
We will be 1.8 miles from Stratford on Avon town centre so we are very lucky because I love it there and my best friend for over over 55 years is 10 minutes away. She is the one that begged me to move closer after she visited and saw how much my mobility had declined. She is our next of kin now because as far as I am concerned I have no family.
Our mobility van is due for delivery next week as well, talk about timing.
Hope you and yours are well Chris. You will soon be able to put your Xmas mice on display xxxx
Haha yes that threw me there for a mo, thought it was A Wallace and Grommet tale "The Wrong Dogs" . . . I'm sure as you say it will all be worth it when you're in situ and sorted. As I said I loved my time in Stratford and I'm envious of you being in the heart of it. It's on my list of places to revisit and I'm hopeful of a return some day. I'm sure you will have happy times with your long time best friend so keep that mind over the coming weeks.
My good lady and I are both good Thanks but my son , partner and kids all have Covid so isolating. Thankfully symptoms are not too bad.
Your treasured gifts are already on display because we love them so much, I doubt they will be put away.
This will be a new chapter in your life Jilly, and I’m sure your present stress will all be worth it in the end. As I’ve said before, it’s such a beautiful part of the country. Xx
Yes, I agree. Moving is very stressful. We just moved in June to a bigger place then before but since my partner bought the place, he asked me not to take some pieces of my furniture that were in my family for many many years. When we finally moved everything over here, we realized we didn’t have room for all of our stuff anymore, even though I had gotten rid of so much. He finally bought me a piece of furniture that was not anywhere near the quality of what I had, but at least we can finish unpacking the rest of our boxes. I was so mad at him but for the sake of the relationship, I finally put my anger aside, and we are getting along again. It’s a exhausting task, but we have a joke that this is the last place for us before the nursing home. 😜
Hi Jill, moving at any time is very stressful and tiring we all know and I sympathise with you as you’re having to use so much energy which your health doesn’t let you have. We’ve been in our bungalow 54 years after moving from the house we’d only been in for 6 years and that was just a 5 min car ride away. Any thoughts of moving now would horrify me. My thoughts and good wishes are with you for the rest of your preparations and do try to have a daytime nap when you can. I wish you both every happiness in your new home and a new start. I loved Stratford when we visited on two occasions. Take care, love Fran xx
Thanks My friend, we moved into this house so that mum could live with us as she was not coping after losing dad. My beautiful hubby welcomed mum even though we had just started our married life together. What was hard was mum was not willing to get rid of anything from her home so our small bedroom was full from floor to ceiling and from the back of the room to the front. She lived with us 13 years and never once asked about anything in there. When she had her stroke and had to go into the nursing home we hired a skip and just started chucking things in it from the upstairs window. We kept things to make her room a home but we still filled the skip. We are now seeing light at the end of the tunnel. The house is nearly packed up now but God it’s been torture to do it all xx
Hi jilly I feel tired reading your post Lol hope it all goes well for you all the hard work will be worth it in the end your new home sounds lovely best wishes Poppy
I used to love moving - and as an Army wife, that was a good thing. Every two years or so, I would have to pack and move a family of four, to all areas of the globe.
Since leaving the army life, I've moved four times. After the last time, 2 years ago I vowed I would never do it again. I moved from a 2-bed house, to a one-bed flat, and that was the move from hell. Downsizing was a nightmare. I threw out or gave away so much stuff.
I'm definitely here to stay for ever more.
Hope you settle in to your new home quickly. Kari.
😂 A rough guess is that I've packed and moved, 20 times - and of those 20, six were to new countries - Where in some instances furniture and possessions went into storage for a while. Having to move with what we could fit in the car with two children, and with one move a cat, who had to go into quarantine for months, called for a lot of organisation. 😅
I couldn’t Cope with that. 😱😱My neighbour was an army wife -( not divorced he’s a civilian now) she told me about the moving out inspections.I’m a nervous wreck waiting to go through airport boarding/security for fear of having the wrong paperwork .
I thought that the stories of them wearing white gloves and inspecting the oven with a magnifying glass and torch had to be an exaggeration! They weren't - everything has to look as new, like the house had never been lived in and the oven like it had never been used.
I used to clean the oven every week to keep it looking sparkling new - now, I can't remember the last time I cleaned mine!
I don’t feel tired reading your post but I do feel frightened about what on earth my husband & I will do when it’s time for us to downsize. Maybe I can just take the things that are really special & let someone else come in and take all the rest. I’m sure there will be much more left than taken. You amaze me with how well you’re holding up but I too am concerned you not overdo it. Please take power naps as Chris said or just rest if you can’t sleep. What a wonderful new life you have ahead! Katie
Moving house is one thing but it seems you are totally uprooting. I wish you well in your new adventure . When I can’t sleep I use the time to go down stairs and do household chores. That then means I can totally chill for the rest of the day. How long until the big move?
Oh my gosh! Poor you, Jilly (and everyone else trying to move house or deal with years of accumulated stuff! It is exhausting, both physically and emotionally.)I have always been energetic and felt that nothing would stop me in my tracks, but this ET thing is actually silently draining me too.
We have just done a move from Spain and are combining two households. My wonderful hubby is adorable but is finds it hard to let go of anything. Feeling quite stressed about the whole thing but bit by bit the boxes are being taken to the charity shops, or posted on Gumtree. We will never live like Marie Condo but hopefully won't trip over stuff in the corridors!
Just pace yourself, Jilly, and good luck with the move. And one more thing - maybe put something in your diary that you can look forward to...I found that helps!
I feel your pain jillydabrat! Stratford upon Avon is a very beautiful place, my stepdaughters moved there with their Mum and her partner and my husband and I went down to see them regularly. I moved in June from what was our 5 bed family home for 23 years. You can imagine the 'stuff' accumulated having had 3 kids and many times 5(step children) and a husband who wouldn't even part with a cardboard box of any electrical item purchased. It's only me and the dog now and the upkeep was getting too hard for me to cope with. For 8 weeks I sold, gave away, auctioned and dumped so much stuff. The council tip was my regular 'outing'. Was difficult as I was only allowed 8 visits in a month. I would find myself still packing boxes at 10pm, knowing I had a deadline to make. I left that house in move in condition to move to my new one to find so much stuff left by the previous owner and absolutely no cleaning up having been done and a garden that hadn't been pruned in 4 years since the original owner moved to Spain and rented it out. Still having to get rid of even more stuff and bits of furniture that I thought would fit in here but doesn't.
I've still unpacked boxes piled in the small garage along with my new bathroom fitments. Having had the kitchen done since the move, it's been chaos and I hit a slump, physically and mentally. I'm now taking one day at a time and if I feel I need to do nothing that's exactly what I'm doing. I do think the stress of it all is very hard but like me, you'll get there.
I threw my hands up in despair when my husband and I couldn’t agree on a new kitchen. Although both of us were desperate to do it out. It was put on the back burner for a few months and I’ve slowly started to think about it again. Reading your post has sent my mind in a whirl- my ET has definitely destroyed my ability to cope with such situations. How you and others have coped I just don’t know.
Oh Wyebird, sorry if I've put you in a whirl. Who is in the kitchen most should be the decider I think. After moving from a large real oak kitchen I've gone modern and minimal. White gloss units, no handles and a light grey sparkly granite worktop with dark grey feathered oak floor that actually has stone incorporated into it (guaranteed for 20 years), all easily kept. and even my 52kg dog can't mark it. I've never taken on such a project on my own before and it was daunting and I was living out of the sitting room with my kettle and a microwave set up on a table. I just kept saying to myself that I can do this, it's happening. Heaven help me when the bathroom begins which should be in about 2 weeks. Going from 3 bathrooms to 1 means I may have to use a bucket in the garage!!!
Haha your kitchen sounds just as I wanted mine but then we have two small settees side ways on each side of patio doors over looking courtyard garden. Because of the sette I wanted a bit less minimalism- I live on those settees especially when I’m not good.Now I’ve gone back to that idea and embrace it😱😱😱.still can’t face upheaval at moment.
Dear Jill, I don't envy you one bit. I would be feeling similar to you if I had to move. I hope you don't have a deadline and can pace yourself better than you have been doing. At least once you have moved, hopefully you will have a lot to be excited about and a lot to look forward to. I hope it all goes smoothly in the end.
Hi Maggie, we are getting our final 2 quotes on the 12th then we will book our moving day, possibly as early as the 16th but as of yesterday we are officially boxed up. There are bits all over the place that we have to box up before moving day but we got there after trip after trip to the dump, 2 car fulls of clothing, blankets and towels to the homeless shelter and selling “stuff” that has been accumulated over the years, oh and the auction house is coming next week to pick up a bedroom full of furniture and the white goods. Can’t put into words how hard it’s been doing this with PV. Some days I would wake up and be so overwhelmed that I had panic attacks! Now we can Pat ourselves on the back. The idea was to pack up ourselves to save money but buying packs after packs of boxes, tubs and huge rolls of bubble wrap, I am wondering if we saved that much. We have been more than a little shocked at the quotes so far so we are hoping Monday’s quotes are more competitive.
It's the word overwhelm that I can relate to. I'm sure you will cope with the final few "bunging" boxes (you can't pack everything before the final day. It must be heartbreaking to have to clear so much of your life away, but once you have moved, I'm sure it will all have been worth it. When we had to move out for 18 months due to flooding, Pickfords provided boxes. Perhaps the cost was hidden in the cost of the removal, but it was an insurance thing so the various financial aspects didn't arise. I just hope you don't still have too much stuff when you get settled; it's always nice to be able to buy one or two things specifically for the new abode. Less is more and all that. Fingers crossed that you will find a reasonable quote on Monday.😘🤗
Hi Jill, I don’t envy your move, but how lovely for you to be moving to Stratford. We were there overnight 2 weeks ago for an anniversary treat. It is beautiful. Wishing you all the happiness in the world in your new home. Karen x
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