Do you know how I feel???

Hi I am new on here...I have suffered from depression on and off for many years. i seem to improve then I end up goin down again.

I feel so guilty about letting people down, work colleagues and family (who don't really understand) I have just taken in a sick note as the doctor has signed me off for 2 weeks, I wasn't goin to hand it in as where I work have a system if you are off more than 3 times in one year you have a 'return to work' then in my circumstance it would go forward to a disciplinary as i have been off through sickness and misgraines which are linked to my stress levels. I am scared when i go back I will get a written warning as they don't see depression as an illness its another absence!

This is just adding to my anxiety and depression

5 Replies

  • Hi Shell,

    I understand how you feel, I work as part of a close knit team, and I too feel that I am letting them down being off.

    Are you in a union? They might be able to help and if you do get called into the office then you are entitled to have a rep with you. At least that way your employer will have to stick within the law.

    Your employer has a duty to help you manage stress too, there is good information at

    Your employer may not be very sympathetic to this, so you may have to be tactful in how you raise this,


  • I am not in the union at work, although I have been thinking about it.....even though you can take a rep in with you they are not allowed to comment....would this make any difference?

  • Hi Shell,

    A rep would help, because you have a witness to what was said, and they can then advise you on whether what has been said is legally correct and what action is open to you.

    A representative has a legal right to talk on your behalf, check out


  • Yeah I totally connect with what you are saying Shell. I get the same with my depression. Have you officially told work that you have depression? I did and I was sent to ATOS who recommended that I be given an extra 8 days a year off for it. I was also given more breaks.

    Its part of Health and Safety and your employers should be able to make reasonable adjustments for you. If they won't seek union help.

    At my job I was only allowed 6 days a year off sick on a rolling period. If I went over that I would get an official warning. In the end I was on a final written warning and transgressed that by 1 day and they took the opportunity to sack me.

    Good luck and I hope this has helped.

    Bev x

  • I am lucky as my boss totally understands depression as I have been hospitalised through it.I understand migraines also having suffered with them for 50 years.And suffered is the right word.I manage them with Imigran and Diclofenic suppositories for the pain.If you can manage your migraines with the right meds that would help.I can phone my work and say as soon as the meds work I will be in.Your Dr may be able to put 'viral illness on your sicknote to buy you some time.Depression AND migraine sucks..I feel for you hope this helps,

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