I am shocked by what happened to me and after some time I am able to talk about it. I went to a party with a boy I slept with a couple of times- so our relationship could be defined as friends with benefits, as we were in fact friends but we also had sex- and a small group of boys, his friends, that I didn't know. He was gone for the whole party talking to some other girl and we got completely wasted. I was so wasted that I don't remember much but crying and screaming "I am so drunk I am so drunk" and laying on the ground. A friend from the group- so not the boy I slept with a couple of times, who by the way was there in that moment and could have stopped it- took me to his place and we had sex, even if I was unconscious most of the time, and I know this for sure because at some point he took off the condom and I would have never let this happen if I had been conscious of what was happening. The morning after I woke up with the biggest hangover but still had sex with him, took plan B and went home.
Now I found out that I have bruises on my butt, and there was a condom stuck inside me. My vagina feels like burning and I have a white thick discharge that looks like sperm, but I guess all of the sperm should at this time be out of my body. The boy admitted to have "taken advantage" of me being that drunk. I really don't remember what happened, I don't remember taking off my clothes or shoes but I can feel his weight upon me penetrating me. When I try to have intercourse with a regular partner my vagina doesn't allow me to do that, it starts burning, itching and it leaves me pain so I have to stop the penetration. I don't know what to do and I'm going crazy. I can't stop thinking about this, feeling ashamed for what happened and I'm afraid I will never enjoy sex again, as I fear I may have developed a vaginal inflammation, an infection, a STD or that maybe plan B didn't work correctly because the condom was stuck there for days. Please, somebody help me.
First off....this was rape. Having sex with an unconscious person is rape. You say you had sex with them again the next morning while hung over, that was consensual. But it does not excuse the rape the night before. Leaving a condom in you was unbelievably irresponsible, and then you say you feel like you have contracted an STD...have you been diagnosed with any, or are you currently seeking medical help with your existing symptoms. You need medical treatment as well as therapy as you probably are experiencing PTSD.