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Unsure if i am down ?

Dad of 6, 44, work hard, lovely family. Had some ups and down in life but doesn't everyone.

I am not emotional normally, they call me a roughty toughty. Have increasing been getting more emotional when watching programmes or talking about kids growing up etc. Even a disney film ! ? Have also had tears when on my own, in the car for example for no real reason. What is going on !

I did a have a period over the last 12 months where, I did not want to to any diy around the house and for me that is extremely odd and I managed to snap myself out of it. My wife says I am getting more short tempered and I do not want to be this way.

I saw the GP last week and I have a form to complete and then go back to discuss, I did not mention about the short temper i forgot.

I am happy in life in general job, but I am a worrier.

Am I down, The GP asked me and I said I found this very difficult to answer ?

Would pills to help me to relax a little and control things as they are a 6 months minimum on these ?

Any thoughts ?


5 Replies

I would say don't take pills. Assess your life and what has changed. What made you feel fulfilled and motivated before? What is it that triggers the emotion? If you've never experienced this level of emotion before then, to me, it sounds like something you can get through without medication. Talk to your wife and your kids and your friends, the people who know you best and love you need to appreciate how you feel. They might be surprised, they might have picked up on how you feel, they might be able to offer you help. There is strength in showing vulnerability. Perhaps some of them feel the same? If they don't, don't distress. See a counsellor, try meditation, exercise, assess your diet as your body changes with age, alcohol, unbalanced diet, sugar and caffeine can all have massive influences on your mood. Holistic practices such as reiki, aromatherapy, acupuncture, yoga can be of huge help. Perhaps explore spirituality. Medication should be your last resort. Don't let your roughty toughty image prevent you from helping yourself, once you open up and let help in you'll find how many people are in your boat. Those who truly love you will respect and support you through this metamorphosis into a wise, solid, loving man. Good luck!

1 like

I love your reply I would just point out that Mindfulness is like the "new meditation" it's well worth researching. While the scientific community catches up (at least the public one) it's the correct answer for self centering. I've done both, and I believe in spirituality too so I hope you understand I'm not trying to surplant your reply :))


Hello rubeingserved1, thank you for your post and wishing you a very warm welcome. You will find that this is a very helpful and caring community, where I am sure you will receive lots of support and good advice. The reply from Ftea is very helpful and insightful. It is good that you have been to see your GP and that you will have a follow up appointment, to see what treatment plan you both agree on. Perhaps some counselling may be of benefit to you. It can help to talk things through in confidence , where you can explore your feelings and thoughts in a very trusting environment. Often, just by unpicking bit by bit what is going on in your life can lead you to discover perhaps things that are upsetting you but that at the moment you are not aware of. Sometimes finding the reason or trigger to your change of emotions can help you to learn new strategies to help you to feel happier in yourself, and cope better. And although you describe yourself as a tough person, where a lot of people do not see your vulnerable side, it is actually okay to feel vulnerable and to explain this to your family and friends, so they can understand you are going through a difficult time. Showing your emotions may be something you are not used to, but don't feel embarrassed or think you should not feel this way. It can actually show an enormous strength of character to show our emotional side and to talk about our feelings and thoughts. And perhaps some change in your life occurred about a year ago, as before then you say you were motivated and enjoyed doing things around the home. Being a bit short tempered can be a sign of stress or low mood, or even exhaustion as you say you work very hard. I wonder if a little bit of time off work may help you to feel better in yourself? Keep posting on here and let us know how you are getting on,,,,,,wishing you the very best and get well soon, kind regards and good luck to you......

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Hi there!

Tears for no reason suggests you are struggling to find introspection, as I posted above mindfulness techniques can help with this, also other therapies like CBT and introspection and counselling ...

I would not be too concerned about getting on a medication for a while, for sure research the formulation and possible side effects, but it's helping me and it's a good start! You're looking at 10mg - 200mg of a certain formulation (eek) but you're probably eating 500,000 mg of protein a day so it all balances out, yes?

Keep talking to your GP, if you are unsure or you don't get anywhere try for a new GP I suggest, maybe they will refer you who knows?

Congrats on that family lol


I do find it difficult to show my emotions, I am a mans and would not even hold my daughters or wifes handbag ! Maybe there have been some triggers that i did not think off and I might have to put myself out of my comfort zone and perhaps chatting with a counselor would help after all, rather than pills.

Thanks folks :)


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