Depression sucks

[Petersonaj3]

Where or who to turn too , can't live like this anymore

[Petersonaj3]

Not really I'm up and out of bed though that's a good start , just feeling isolated , drinking too much to try and sleep , ain't washing ain't functioning , haven't been too work , just not me this

[Petersonaj3]

I went last week offered me tablets which I refused , thinking it would pass , it hasn't I've been sucked in deeper , work can wait , what they gonna do sack me ....I'm out of bed so it's a start , just feel isolated and alone

[Petersonaj3]

Work is least of my problems at minute I'll go in when I'm ready , try and get a bloody doctors appointment first

[Petersonaj3]

Yeah it's crap , i can't go in when I'm feeling like this , I'm a electrician , yeah I'm suicidal but don't really wanna die if you get what I mean .... hope you're ok too thanks

[Petersonaj3]

Yeah I do know I'm going all about it wrong , it's the not sleeping then it's knockingme the next day and thanks x

[CateJ in reply to Petersonaj3]

You got out of bed mate, that is a start. Scary reading your posts as it reads like you are living my life. Except I'm not an Electrician, wish I was! What's scary is the feeling that there are only two options, taking yourself out of the equation or finding a way. And right now neither seem to be working. Please don't take the former. I've suffered Depression for 20 years but I've never considered ending it all, probably scared they'd find out all my secrets and besides, who would take care of my cats. Finding a resolution is harder, but you are amongst friends here.

If I may, the drink is the reason you can't sleep properly. I can't sleep unless I pass out but after a week without I settle into it. I crave it, damn, I crave it, but when I'm drinking I go to bed at 12 and wake up every damn time at 4.17 with my body craving booze and it goes on and on. If you can give yourself a few dry days, you might find the sleeping sorts itself out. But I feel your pain, I really do. Get that Appointment and don't leave until they HEAR you. Drugs aren't always the answer. Have you considered therapy?

Cate

[Petersonaj3 in reply to CateJ]

No haven't , and I'm gonna try the dry thing just not tonight I've started now so I'll be drinking till I'm asleep , and don't wanna choose the latter but does feel like the easy way out , I'm gonna ring doctors again in the morning it needs sorting , did try to get help with my drinking went too first appointment but then my next one with a counsellor, well I didn't go back just carries on working then drinking when I got in, something has too give , just feel really shitty and thanks for ya kind words everyone

[CateJ in reply to Petersonaj3]

Petersonaj3

Babe, I'm two bottles in after the worst day ever. And that is the struggle. That one bad day will set us back. But am proud of you for looking for answers. AA doesn't work for everyone but speak to your GP and see if they can offer you 1:1 support. I know you just want to sleep my love But we just hope that you wake up. Make that GP listen to you. If you can, go in and tell them everything, they can't tell anyone else under the hypocratic oath!

The world needs people like you, and I don't just mean Electricians! Take care of yourself and keep us posted.

Cate xx

[Petersonaj3 in reply to CateJ]

Will do and thanks cate xx

[Petersonaj3]

Should be I haven't done anything, I'm gonna go and put some music on and shower and clean and try eat , probably won't though end up at shop with beer , thanks for responding, enjoy you're evening xx

[Petersonaj3]

I've had a relaxing 2 weeks think I got bed sores , I'm up but wanna just dive back in there , Musics on rather than the tv which I just stare at had same channel on for 24 hours and that ain't me I'm a flicker normally

[Petersonaj3]

iPods on got a good mix on there and some guilty pleasures

[Petersonaj3]

It's on , right I'm gonna clean this flat is a pig stie , thanks 🙏 bit of Elvis 🕺 uh hu

[Petersonaj3]

Ha ha thanks 🙏 first time I've kinda smiles in weeks

[Hidden]

Please be aware that the use of swear words on here is expressively forbidden so I have amended your reply. Please refer to the pinned posts under 'Use of Inappropriate Language'. Lil

[Petersonaj3]

You did although it might of been wind .... and language dear