Frustrated

[Hope16]

I went to the doctors this morning to ask for help regarding my long battle with depression and all i got was u should watch this inspirational movie ''the way'' and take long walks. I told him I am aware i have a problem and I have tried self help, i feel sometimes emotionally paralysed, when i go through these episodes of depression i shut myself from the world until I feel better, i cant control this feelings of utter hoplessness i get at times like that. Working in customer service is hard bcos when i go through those phases, I have to fake my smile and chirpiness and hide my gloomy expression. I want to be normal just like everyone else. I thought when i was in college it was normal to be the way i was, hide away and distract myself with food and movies and get back to the world. It was only when i went through my childhood diary with a friend that I realised and was made aware that every sentenced i started in a different post was that i was feeling depressed. These were just few little things that made me aware of it, i thought i was just abnormal and hated myself for being weak. Its hard to get help when people and even professionals are dismissive of your mental health.

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Hello

Welcome to our site

If you need too chat we are all here to help if possible

BOB

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Hi unfortunately not all Gp's are supportive towards depressed patients, but some are so I suggest you try another one. Meds and/or counselling should be able to help.

The first one I saw just called me an 'Uptight' person.

Bev x

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Hello Again

You really need to ask yourself why you feel the way you do as you need to understand what you need to do to prevent or control those emotions.

Personally I would try and see another GP in your Practice as you need to have someone to fight in your corner and see what can be done to settle your mood in the short term and arrange a treatment plan for you.

BOB

[Lin1944]

Hi Hope 16. Some Doctors haven't got a clue about depression. I once went to a Doctor and said I was very depressed and she said "go with your friends and have a day out shopping" Well that is the last thing a depressed person can or wants to do.So I went to another Doctor in the Practise. First of all get anti depressants,they can take 4 weeks to start working. Try and get out in the fresh air as it can help. I have spent thousands over the years on alternative treatment including Reiki,hypnosis,acupuncture,massage,transcendental meditation,reflexology. CBT didn't help. I now go on YouTube and listen to Mindfulness on Joy twice a day and it calms me down.Plus it costs nothing and is a 15 min tape.Picture of a pink cloud.

I only joined this forum last month and thanks to Gambit Who advised me to get blood test for B12 and I am now having injections as I am deficient in B12. This can cause depression and tiredness. I feel elated that after 21 years of bouts of depression I may at last have an answer. Take care n see a different Doctor xx

[KHaynes]

Don't don't don't give up

I had a problem with constant bouts of unreasonable anger totally out of control hell for my loved ones such vitriol spewing out and all down to side effects of a tablet I used suddenly making me a monster

I was SENT a huge book about anger management.

I persisted and took control the change in meds fixed the problem in less than two weeks

My sister taught me (she has schitsophrenia) to take control

When we grew up a Dr was god

Now you will find they admit to being artists not scientists

If you feel something is wrong see another Dr keep going you are not wrong

Ignore the stupid book

Chemicals are not good for us but they are in the system

We need them because our brains do not function properly

Many people use drugs or alcohol to cope

Far better to take controlled meds

It can be a long road but keep going and please let me say well done and keep posting this is the real world on here people say it as it is

K xx

[Hope16]

Thank you all so much for your support, I really appreciate it. For the first time I feel i am not alone in this . I have decided to go visit another doctor tmrw and take it from there. I have decided I will get better and do whatever it takes, because I owe it to myself for coming this far in life and for the ppl who love me.xxx

[Lin1944 in reply to Hope16]

Hi when u go new Doctor ask him can you have a blood test for B12. Also don't be afraid of anti depressants as they do work and the difference is amazing. Good luck xxx

[Hope16]

Thank you Lin1944 will do that.xxx

[secondhandrose2]

Hi Hope16

I am sorry you had such a bad experience with your GP - it sounds as though you have been depressed for a long time so his suggestion was inappropriate and insensitive.

You say you wrote in your childhood diary about being depressed - depression during childhood is not normal - unhappiness is, but not depression - so it sounds as though your emotional needs were not being met. You write of sharing things with a friend and it is good that you are able to do that, it suggests you can trust people and know there are reasons for your feeling depressed, that is not just about you.

I think it will help you to talk through your early experiences with someone in order that you can understand what led to your being a depressed child and has become a depressed adult. You need to share your feelings about that, to grieve for what you did not have and let go so that you can move on and have a happier life. It is not that I think you particularly disturbed but feeling hopelessness does suggest you gave up believing you would ever be helped and working through those feelings does take time.

You say you went through college but are working now - does your employer have an occupational health department? Some of the larger employers do. If not then it will have to be NHS (presuming you are in the UK?) or private help. Your GP can refer you for help in the form of counselling or CBT but to be honest when depression goes back to childhood the benefits of those very short term treatments are usually equally short term. Psychotherapy would be a better option for you. Although you might ask your GP to refer you for therapy within the NHS, in practice they will almost certainly want you to try a shorter treatment first, perhaps even for a second time and may only refer you for a more in-depth therapy when you have tried those but are still depressed. An alternative might be to see a private psychotherapist, someone trained to work either psychodynamically or in a person-centred way, or possibly an art therapist if you feel that might be an approach you could use. You could google psychotherapy and your local town or city name and depending where you live you may find there is a training organisation that can offer therapy at a reduced rate. If you want to message me I will try to advise you further about your situation if you think that might be helpful.

Meanwhile do continue to use the website for support as many of us find it invaluable to know people here are available to offer each other support and advise.

Suexx