Hi everyone I've been struggling with life and I don't know why. I should be a happy girl, but lately all I can think about is I wish I had the courage to kill myself. Idk why I'm feeling this way but I jus can't shake it.
When I'm around everyone i can usually pretend I'm OK but here lately all I wanna do is sit in a dark room and cry myself to sleep. I jus wanna be better but I don't know how. 
Hi I know exactly how you are feeling, and so does everyone here who suffers from depression, it hit me suddenly, suffered for 2 years far to long, I really thought it would go away, but I just got worse, rrecently I went to doctors and now am waiting for apptiontment for counseling, I don't know if you have approached your doctor yet but please do, no need to suffer on your own, have you got family and friends you can talk to, please try not to think of taking your life, it is valuable and precious, believe me with help you can be happy again. Annette Xx
Hi there and welcome . As Annette has said it all her reply, visit your GP, get help,
And don't feel guilty, as it can happen to anyone, sometimes it doesn't make
Sense.
There is lots you can do once you get in gear. There is lots on the WEB about
Depression. The NHS have a great site and once you arm yourself with
Knowledge and support, things will feel better and you will feel you are
Managing your mood.
We are a supportive Forum and we have all gone through Depression
In varying forms and we are all ages. So let us know how things go.
Hannah
Hello Broken
Believe me suicide is not an easy way out, tried that and all it does is put you in a hospital bed with tired, flustered medical staff in A and E,
It is all the explanations you will need to give to those who love you and you will not get any understanding for those who will help you to pick up the pieces. If you do manage to top yourself, again those who love you will have too live their lives with your death on their mind until their eventual deaths.
The Hospital will contact the Crisis Team and GP they will then decide your best way forward, still it is all a question of why ad very little of that sympathy that you would think you would be given. Believe me I know I went through it. Do you have any one to manage your medications, I am only given enough for two days at a time, my wife looks after and orders all my drugs, if I need extra pain killers she gives me them from a stash in Her Handbag or where she hides them. Your life could become one of total distrust that you will do it again.
Believe me when I say life becomes more problematic as the people around you will or can become more angry, and distressed because of your actions.
You really need to have words with your GP and tell of your feelings, He will arrange for treatment and support, it is no good trying to live with this illness on your own as in most cases it can be treated.
You can come back o site and we can give support and just listen. Sorry for such a stark reply, if you can get support from family and friends go for it although I would still recommend you seek help for this nasty illness
BOB
Brokeninside... All of the above, great and good advice, and really can't add to it other than you sound quite young, (if I'm wrong I'm sorry) and going through a stage (I hope) and if that is the case, then talking to your GP will be best, and the thing to remember is it will get better and your old self will raise it's head again, best wishes Alex
Hello Alex
Sorry did not get back earlier, I have been away for a week, I am 64 nearly 65
BOB
Maybe there is something that"s bothering you... Your relationship with your family and friends. Or maybe your heart and mind keep recalling the bad happenings in the past. Cheer up! avoid those words or things that are negative. SMILE! 
Dale xx
Hi there, all the above is good advice so please, please see your doctor and get referred to a counselor asap. Write it all down so you remember everything at your next Dr's appointment, feelings etc, if unable to vocalise, then pass the written pages across. Talk, talk and then some, you'll be stronger for it. Take care we're a good bunch on here, very supportive of each other, so even if it's gobbledygook in your head we'll listen whatever time of day a night xxx Dens
I don't know what to do with my life
I don't know what to do and i'm scared!
Don't Know what i am feeling ): 
Don't know what to do anymore
So low I don't know what to do anymore
