I don't want to keep all doom and gloom but I have often wondered if anyone else feels all alone even in a room full of people or even in your own family and friends company.
I have tried to explain it to family and friends and they get on the defence and take offence!
Perhaps it's just me!
Michelle you are definately not alone in feeling alone when with other people. I used to feel alone all the time, when I did anything I was alone - didnt matter who I was with, the relationship I had with that person I always felt like I had to 'do it on my own' and it upset me all the time I didnt know why. On nights out with my friends I used to feel so horrible and alone. Its one of the things that happens when you feel depressed, you feel like this but the better you get the less alone you feel. Have you spoken to a good friend or someone who you feel comfortable with? the more you talk about it the better you feel, it just lifts a weight off your shoulders and then it helps you to feel better about things. hope your okay xxxxxxxxxxxxxx hugs
Pandora,you are so kind. When I was well I used to feel like I almost needed to clear room in my head to let the others in.
When I look back and compare my life now I was only so popular with friends as they used to use me. I would have my seven seater car packed to the legal limit after school,at weekends and school holidays.
Strange thing was that if childcare needed sorting I was most welcome to the group then I would hear them all talking outside the school about how they had a great time at the weekend,having a meal then going round the pub etc and I was never not even once invited.
When I turned so ill that I couldn't even look after mine so Gary my husband had to give up work all those people who were my friends disappeared never to be seen again. If I did ever come across any of them they would just patronise me and talk down to me then about me.
As all my boys are at senior school now I never hear from them.
There are children out there I looked after as good as my own and I see hear from my boys what they are all doing now and what their parents are doing and it's not sat alone in their room for years previous like me.
Love is definitely unconditional I have a Brother with severe cerebral palsy and when I see him his face almost lights up and we will look at one another and I make jokes to him about being my baby brother(he is five years younger) and he grins,I talk to him like I do everyone I know he understands me and the love could not be any more unconditional.
Strangely to be honest when I am with my brother I don't feel alone I feel as we are together in our thoughts.
Just thought I would share that with you he is my hero and I know I will never ever feel about anyone else in the way I feel for him.
He misses me we were always together but I am sure he knows what I am going through.
He is the best and I just want to tell the world how inspirational he is and of course special.
Perhaps it feels like I am so alone now as I rarely get to see him.
You sound like a strong lady yourself and you speak a lot of sense.
Hugs to you
Michelle x
Hi Michelle
Yes yes yes yes you are not alone, I sometimes feel alone too in a crowd. Not
Always but if I am depressed that happens. Pandora is so right, when the mood
Improves that alone or lonely feeling tends to lesson.
Michelle I think in life we are alone and some people feel more like that
Anyway, maybe it's nothing to do with Depression but some just feel alone.
I am sure everyone on this Forum has felt like you have felt, and I'm not trying
To trivialise how you feel.
Michelle we are always here for you and I admire your honesty .
Sending you a big warm Irish hug.
Hannah xx
Hi Hannah,I hope you don't mind but I had that hug when I needed it most.
I had to have my Catheter changed due to it blocking off.
I hate it and I will never get used to it and I get upset after.
My Husband Gary asked if I cry as it's painful,partly yes but the biggest part is still coming to terms with having it for the rest of my life.
The pipe threads through my stomach and straight into my bowel. As it's an open tract I keep getting urine and kidney infections.
Ideally my bladder would be removed but I am told that I wouldn't or more than likely not survive the operation. It would take an awful lot of my pain away and with less opiates I may function like a normal person.
It's not to be.
It is at times like when having the nurse in to do my catheter i feel so alone as I lie there and know it's me here alone and I have no choice I have to lay there and let it happen.
As for this Forum I do enjoy my time on here and look forward to reading and posting. It takes me a while to reply at times as I fall asleep when typing them.
If you ever get any nonsense off me please believe it's sleep reading and posting.
Will give you a hug back as I did take advantage of yours as I cried on your shoulder as well. Sorry for that.
Huuuugggggggsssssssss
Love
Michelle x
Hi Michelle sorry I'm just reading your reply now. Thanks for using
That hug. Oh Michelle it's no wonder you feel alone when you are
Suffering, that's so so understandable and don't feel bad about it.
Michelle when I was lying in bed before my back op, I too felt so
Alone and its horrible.
Please be gentle and kind with yourself, as anything like Kidney
Thungs especially repeated infections are so painful.
So I'm sending you another hug and I'm usually around if
You want a chat, even though I might not reply immediately, but
Better late than never. Lol
Hannah xx
No it's not just you Michelle. The loneliest times are when you feel like that. Do you know why this is? You are not alone. bev xx
Hi Bev, I think it is worse at times when I keep it all in or overthink things. I also think it's going from a relatively busy and packed life outside and inside of the house to it being me and just me who rarely attempt's the outdoors and is in one room indoors.
It came on when I was having all my surgeries once or twice a day sometimes.
The surgeons would come round the ward to me and depending on results ,an examination and to how I felt I would get told we are leaving the ward round to the other team of doctors and we will see you in theatre I around a quarter of an hour,most times not long enough to phone Gary and tell him I was going back down,he would find out from the hospital ringing him. It was tough on him as well and I often wonder if he ever felt all alone when I was so ill.
He is hard to talk to at times and always says to me why bring the past up.
So just that makes me look back alone then I question was I alone then?
It's so difficult to understand the simplest of things at times.
I know where you are coming from with what you say about it.
Thanks for your reply Bev
P.M will be arriving tomorrow
Hope you are ok
Michelle
X
Hi, No I think most people have experienced that feeling at some point. I have a friend who suffers from lupus she feels some days she has lossed hours in the day she cannot account for? I have heard other people feel that way ex drug users. Feeling alone even in the company of people you love its a tough one
another side effect of depression i feel. jue1x
Michelle
You're definitely not on your own with this. I sometimes feel as if ai'm looking through a sheet of glass when they are talking and laughing as if I'm there but not really relating to what they're saying as they're making plans, seem so happy, etc and I just feel like a empty shell and robot.
Yep! I'm right there with you. Sometimes I just want to get out of the crowded and go be alone - that way I have an excuse for feeling lonely...
Maybe you have reason to feel all doom and gloom and they don't understand.
Oh, yes .... I have felt this way quite often since ny husband passed away. There could be 100 people in the room, but I can feel utterly alone.
Others do share this feeling, even while being with others.
Your not alone. I know exactly how you feel and it's the worst feeling in the world 
Pink 1181
I think it must be difficult for people who have never felt like this to understand it.
I think it offends close family and friends but it's not them making us feel alone, the thought is with us.
Then they wonder as friends and family if we value them,of course we do because our world would be duller and more unhappy without them.
It kind of like contradicts it's self. It's nobody's fault we feel like this it is just part and parcel of your mind set when you are depressed.
Thank you for your reply
Michelle
X
You are not alone and you are not the only one like that, it is often difficult to talk to those close to use because we dont them to think of us as weak. Maybe you need to just tell them that you need help because of how you feel, explain and if they love you they will listen which i am sure they will
So alone......
Alone
I feel so alone
Iam alone.
