Struggling with sex after circumsicion

[Nico99]

my boyfriend had the op before we met, once it healed I managed to finish him during sex now it seems impossible, sometimes it works with my hand but it makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong any tips?

[Hidden]

Is everything OK in your relationship? Is everything OK in your boyfriend’s life. Sometimes stress or emotions can play a big role in such problems.

[BexyBoy]

Forgive me if you've already thought of the following, please just take from it what you find useful: - I suggest the best approach is to talk, both at times when you are not physically engaged with each other and during the sex session. Encourage him to tell you what he's feeling, both emotionally and physically. Model this behaviour by expressing your feelings and sensations, (mentally you can follow the sequence 'when you do that, I'm feeling this' as a guide). Show and tell him as to what gives you pleasure and ask him to show and tell you what works for him. As a couple it will probably help to both ease off on orgasm being a goal. Let other areas of his and your body be a focus of pleasure as well as the genitals. Make sex about slow, relaxing pleasure rather than hot stimulating passion - although this is good when it can happen with mutual consent, too, of course! Years ago, the phrase love-making was often used. We now tend to say 'having sex', which in itself seems a rather short and fast description and implies it is something we receive rather than create together! Perhaps search online with the words 'Sensate Focus'. You may well find what sex therapists use to help couples will be worthwhile information.

[Nico99]

He does have a stressful job and we have a long distance relationship, he said its him but no idea what's happening

[Pass1961]

Sex after circumcision is different. Give it time and remember 95% of sex is the lead up to climax so focus on that and don’t worry about the finish, it will happen when you stop stressing about it.

[Hidden in reply to Pass1961]

Wise advice.

[Nico99 in reply to Pass1961]

Thankyou i think its put me down because I worry its me even though he's reassuring me its not, my friend was the same with her boyfriend and his op was a year ago and only hes just starting to finish during sex i guess everyone is different

[Heythere33]

I have had sex well over 200 times uncircumcised. I got circumcised sept of 2020 have had sex twice, and it's with a girl I like, but I had little to no feeling down there. It's weird because I have a flashlight, and I can feel that, not like when I was uncircumcised, I would climax 2 seconds tops. I tried explaining to her that it's not her and it's my penis she starts talking about her previous guy friends who didn't have a problem (turn off) 🤢 made me lose respect for her long story short she was butt hurt because she couldn't make me cum. I'm hoping the sensitivity will come back or I'm done with sex. 😔

[Ferbrizo]

You’re not doing anything wrong. It happens to me and I’ve been circumcised for 5-6 months now and I have problems while having intercourse with my wife, it used to not happen. But I can go on and on and nothing. Maybe in my head but w/e as long as she’s satisfied I’m good.

[Randomme]

I get what you mean about feeling like you’re doing it wrong when with your hand, my boyfriend used to feel the same.

If you’re gonna use your hand I’d just recommend lots of lube and focus on the head of the penis.

Can guarantee tho it’s not a YOU issue at all!

There are so many other potential factors, including that his penis just might have gotten less sensitive over time.

Sounds odd but I even have on and off days when my boyf can finish me and other days where he can’t.

I can’t say for certain what your solution is but I do know that it’s not your fault so please don’t stress about it/blame yourself!