I'm struggling at the moment and don't really know what to do so thought I'd turn to you lot to see if you can offer any words of wisdom.
I seem to have gotten use to the physical things that lupus does to my body/brain and am pootling along nicely on the steroids but in the last week or so it seems to have dawned on me that I have this bloody illness (diagnosed about 6 weeks ago) and out of nowhere i am consumed with anger.
Now normally i am known for my patience and understanding. It takes a lot to push my buttons and get any kind of reaction from me but in the last week I've been really arsy, seem to have swallowed too much 'truth juice' and have a very low bullshit threshold.
I don't have the patience for anyone, get out of my way, I don't want to talk to you and I don't want to listen to you.
This has totally come out of nowhere and I am at a loss as to what to do with myself. I can hear myself saying things and thinking god that wasn't nice! I guess it's best described as mega extreme pmt!
I don't really give a toss about being arsy at the moment (clearly) but it is driving my friends mad and I would like to still have some friends in a few weeks time. I think I'm angry at the loss of my life as i knew it. And I know.....you can still lead a fulfilling life etc but i can't shake this anger at this bloody illness.
Has anyone else gone through an angry patch after they have been diagnosed or dealt with other emotions after diagnosis?
Ps, I know this makes me sound like a really horrible person but usually I'm the total opposite which is why I don't know what to do!