Feeling unimportant...yet again!!

[MandieR]

Hi guys, I hope everyone is managing to stay safe and well and shielded during this crazy time. I wanted to ask opinions and advice, please.

Amongst my Lupus issues, I have suffered from mini strokes/panic attacks/anxiety attacks, the last one, about 18 months ago took my to A&E where the stroke team referred me to psychotherapy. I honestly felt that finally someone may listen and help and during that time, mostly that has been the case. I have attended a couple of group sessions but found them unhelpful, so as it wasn't a demand that I go I did not attend the rest, also I have been quite I'll the past 4 months and could not get myself to the hospital in order to attend.

Yesterday, I received a letter from the psyche team saying they were 'discharging' me due to non attendance to these group meetings. That was like a kick in the teeth for me, apart from anything else they had prescribed me different anti depressants and now I do not know what I am meant to do. Once again, my issues feel unimportant and they wonder why I deal with things alone!

[lupus-support1 Administrator]

I am sorry to read you are feeling distressed.

Where you being seen?

It's probably no comfort, but in the NHS, if you don't attend and do not contact them to explain your situation, you will be discharged on the assumption that you don't attend & can offer your place to someone else. Group therapy is offered when the clinician feels it would be helpful, but it is also a way of seeing more patients given the limited resources.

Psychotherapy in the NHS is under strain even before COVID-19. There are insufficient resources for mental health.

Would you consider contacting them either by letter, addressed to your psychotherapist, or ask to speak with them by phone? This would indicate that you do have a commitment. Currently, they may feel you aren't committed to therapy. You have to tell them that you are & why it was difficult to attend the group sessions.

As a psychotherapists in the NHS, I had had to write letters to a patient, who was terrified most of the time but eventually after 3 months, I wrote to say that if the patient didn't make contact, I would suggest they reapply at some later time, when they felt able to attend.

The psychotherapist doesn't know what is in your mind without you saying something. I understand you feel as if you are being dropped, but rather than post here, contact them and ask to see someone to explain why you didn't attend group therapy.

Please contact them & then tell me what is happening, if you wish to do so. It's very important you try and take control of what you need.

Stay safe & be well!

With good wishes,

Ros