Food for thought

Upon parking up a woman said to the man in the next vehicle, ”You don't look disabled.” He took his hat off to reveal his lack of hair and said...”The intensive chemo makes every part of my body hurt; I struggle to catch my breath; I am not entitled to benefits due to my savings that I have put to one side for my family when I die as my cancer is terminal; so I am using my blue badge for all its worth as this country is on it’s a**e and it's the only thing they have decided a dying man is entitled to! (She didn't know where to look).

Having a blue badge myself I parked and got out of the car, she said to me, "well, you look perfectly normal to me!", as I turned to look at her and said, very seriously, "maybe that's part of the problem, you can't see what's lurking under my shell." The look on her face was priceless! “Just because YOU can't SEE it doesn't mean it doesn't exist! Until you have walked in our shoes and have felt the pain we feel, keep your cruel comments and opinions to yourself.” Ignorant people can be so cruel!!

Hard to explain to someone who has no clue. It's a daily struggle being in pain or feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. If you or someone you know has an invisible illness ( from angina to Zika) you will know what I mean. Never judge.

14 Replies

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  • I know what you mean, I have eye drops for eye problems, cancer scars, lymphodema 'bubble wrap's to wear in my bra as a compression garments, after living with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since 1994 there's nothing to show people, as me and my bed have got me to this level of fitness, stay strong xxx

  • I agree. I would like to add that people who are classed as obese also get abuse and judged. You only have to be a little overweight and the abuse starts. There are more than food issues and laziness to having weight issues as this can be caused by a number of other reasons out of the control of the person afflicted. We need more understanding all around in this world.

  • Loved this - and I really get it. Had Polio as a kid, and one learns to cope with 50% loss of muscles, but comments that really hurt often come from doctors who should know better: Q. why didn't you have the vaccinaion? A. Salk announced it during my first month in hospital. Q. How long ago did you have Polio? A. In 1956. Oh - so you are well over it now.

  • One wonders sometimes about the training of doctors - like the one who asked my friend "When did you get Cystic Fibrosis?" Answer - nine months before I was born!!!

  • All I can say to this what an idiot and they are supposed to be inteliegent

  • Great post x assumptions are made all the time about so called 'invisible' illnesses. They are perfectly visible to those of us who have them.

  • Your right people are to quick to judge. Was lifting my niece from school one day brother was driving & we pulled into blue badge Park, I was heading on crutches over to get her, this woman shouts "here u, here u', I had walked on as never even turned round, then our boy shouts my name, here is this crazy lady running at me, says 'where is ur badge, do u have a badge, I had to walk from out there (points to gates of school), I shouldn't have to do that, I Park there (points at car), she was shouting at me. I told her yes I've a blue badge went to walk on, next thing my brother pops his head outta car, says why is she shouting at u & why aren't u sorting it out? He too has a right to use space (amputee). I didn't lower myself to her standard as I don't know what's wrong with her, yes she did say had problems with walking … did race after me, maybe that was a good day for her, if it was goodluck to her as I don't have good days, but who looked the fool? Sorry about long post x

  • Loved this post people are so inconsiderate and really do not care about others feeling and it really gets on their nerves when you don't argue back as that is what they want to argue with you

  • I had it coming out of a disabled toilet can you not read it says disabled toilet.I said yes I know it is and turned to walk away if looks could have killed I would have been stone dead I was furious but turned and said have a nice day I think that peed her right off.I will not explain my disabilities to no one xx

  • Good on yas ladies lol 😭

  • The last bit of your post made me laugh have a nice day I shall have to remember that one.On saying that what annoyed me when I went to use a disabled toilet there was this line of possible six people waiting I could not wait that long so I used normal toilet which due to space and trying to manoeuvre was a nightmare I came out of toilet and peering out crack in door of disable toilet was this woman she said quick they have gone now following out of the toilet was four children about between four and ten it was her that was holding people up so I said to her politely about the fact that a lot of people had to struggle trying to use ordinary toilet she said f--- off on walking past I said to her one day she might have difficulties the eldest child said to me fat b---- I thought if that's how she allows her children to talk like that to people as she just laughed

  • I have had the same thing happen to me. People can be very judge mental,

  • Has anyone got any more Crass Comments from Professionals? I am thinking of putting something on cancersurvivorships.com

  • This happened to a friend, only he was sat in the car, as his cancer made it too painful to walk. His wife did all the driving and it was his way of getting out of the house! A woman actually came over to him and as he opened the window said, 'you don't look very disabled to me', his reply, 'no you can't see my cancer because it's in my bones'. She slunk off extremely embarrassed! He, however has been extremely lucky after being given only 3-5 years, 9 years later and is now in remission. There are only 3 people in the UK with his type of cancer and they were all used as Guinea pigs with a new drug from an American drug company!

    Moral of this.....never judge a book by its cover!

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