Controlling negative thoughts

How do I stop my mind from racing and always going to the worst case scenario? Dealing with a separation from my husband and not doing well with my depression and anxiety. I’m afraid, sad and crying all the time.

[pink83737]

Hey Turtell, I just wanted to let you know these feelings will pass. I would look into mindfulness and research the benefits of it! They have lots of apps for it and one I would recommend is the headspace app it’s wonderful for stopping those racing thoughts! Don’t be afraid, God is with you all the time! He will walk with you through this storm, stay strong! Storms don’t last forever soon the sun will shine 💛 think happy thoughts 💭 I like to think that spring is almost here and all the flowers will be blooming very soon 🌷

[Hidden in reply to pink83737]

Thank you. I need to make my health (mental and otherwise) a priority. I’m just not real good at doing that.

[Hidden]

How do you stop them? Allow them. The next time they travel in your brain instead of fighting them (which keeps them there) tell yourself "I don't like these thoughts but go ahead be there in my brain" and see how fast they vanish. Also, if you're visual say to yourself "Thoughts. These are just thoughts" and visualize them floating on clouds and passing off to the sides out of your brain. I also say "catastrophic thinking" and picture them moving to the right (in my head) floating away on clouds.

The more we fight our thoughts the more they hang around.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I will have to try that. Had a panic attack this morning on my way to work. I was afraid to pull over for fear that I wouldn’t get going again.

[Hidden]

I've lived with this for 40 years. I do have a life. I am on .25mg Xanax 2 times a day which is great at helping. However, that's a really low dose (we don't like to me medicated) so I do still have challenges. REcently I signed up for Calm.com and listen to meditations and education in the masterclasses. It cost me $60 for one year.

Remember, if you do some things like walking, avoiding sugar, meditate, exercise, etc., and see improvements you must keep it up. However, many of us forget quickly how bad panic and anxiety is when we feel good and stop doing what helps and then the cycle begins.

I worked myself up to walking an hour many days a week. I was once stuck in the house and would cry just going to the mailbox because of the panic. I slowly did exposure therapy. Go out for one minute and back, then two minutes and back and so on.

I've done that at parks and have had times where I have been able to walk 1:45 without panic. But it does creak in and out. But I use all the tools I learned from my counselor as well as calm.com, etc.

We all hear something the right day and when we're ready...that helps. Keep it up.

[HopeinGod]

Hi Turtell, it is difficult to not go to worst case scenarios. That happens to all of us and it hurts to the core. If I may ask, is your separation due to work, military service or relational issues? While all three of these may cause the same sadness and anxiety, these three can also have different possible solutions. Do you agree? At this time, what kind of help are you seeking? Do you have a trusted friend or relative that can be your shoulder? I know I can always call my sister but I also rely heavily on the power of prayer from myself as well as others. I just prayed for you, blessings

[Hidden in reply to HopeinGod]

Relationship issues. We have grown apart and just want different things. I do have friends that I can talk to but I’m so afraid that they won’t want to deal with me and my drama. Trust issues. I have family but they are not supportive in any way. I am also a legal guardian for my mother who has just gone into hospice care. Overwhelmed

[HopeinGod in reply to Hidden]

Oh my goodness, you truly have some tough issues to deal with. I'm really sorry to hear about your mom. Taking care of your mom as her daughter and legal guardian is overwhelming and can add pressure and stress in so many areas of life. I'm really sorry to hear. I had hospice for my dad and they were wonderful. They also had a social worker/advocate to help. Do you have someone like that in the hospice care your mom is getting? If there is such a person, would you consider asking them for help with your marital issue? I cannot emphasize enough how having to take care of a loved one can and will deeply affect the caregiver and her relationships. You need a ton of support from so many sources. If you attend a church or if there is one close by, have you considered reaching out to them for support? Praying for you right now, blessings

[Hidden]

Your okay, divorce is awful. 50% of marriages end in divorce. We take it like we failed, we're a failure. We no longer have 2 paychecks. All are friends and family are taking sides, judging. Divorce happens, you are normal. Transition is a struggle. Readjust your finances, might have to move, make new friends and after a mourning process, get back out in the dating world. If you have kiddos, they get priority. It's a hot mess, you will be okay. Take it step by step and in no time at all, you will find your balance between work, finances, children, friends and fun time. Cry, be sad, what are all the steps for the mourning (death) process. You will experience them all, then you will, have accepted the reality. You are okay, you are normal. Divorce sucks however there is life after divorce and that's the light at the end of the tunnel. Don't do the "what if", it will just delay the inevitable. Accept and you will go through the process and light is right around the corner, I've been there