Encourage

[jesset]

Sorry every one if you message & I don't reply right away please I need your encouragement

[Hidden]

Hello jesset

I think when we post and someone replies we know we may have helped and if the poster does not reply we sometimes can think that we have not helped so we can back away not wanting or feeling we could be making things worse , with the internet you can only really go on responses to know what is happening

You say you need encouragement and we will do our best , if you could say more in what way you would like to be encouraged it would really help

Take Care x

[jesset in reply to Hidden]

Night time is the worse for me need someone to just talk keep my mind bussy and tell me things that help you

[Hidden in reply to jesset]

Hello

I don't like these dark nights and the way they are drawing in , in fact I was just telling hubby how they get me down and when I am feeling anxious well the darkness does make it feel worse and at night things slow down , you don't see people passing and it can feel worse

Are there any clubs or anything you could join ? friends you could invite over some evenings ?

Do you have any hobbies or could you take one up like maybe making greeting cards ? if you are good at anything like that it can keep you occupied as well as make someone happy that you may send one to ?

I think if we know night time is worse for us it is about making a plan to keep them as occupied as we can

I like TV and all the soaps so that helps a little to distract me and sometimes coming on here and answering posts can be distracting as while you are trying to help someone else it can take your mind of yourself for a while

Hope some others if the come on will have some more suggestions x

[jesset in reply to Hidden]

I just now contacted done one that will be picking me up to go to a men's meeting Fri night that's a huge help for me to get out

[Hidden in reply to jesset]

That is brilliant , good for you

What sort of meetings are they ?

Not long to wait then x

[Hidden in reply to jesset]

Im the same night time is too dark and still for me. I make sure I have relaxed things to do so it’s not too quite... for me it’s audiobooks and podcasts.

I also have a low light on until I feel extra sleepy.

It’s funny I actually cannot sleep unless it’s pitch black dark lol 🤷‍♀️

[Michael8072 in reply to Hidden]

Night time is the worst for me too. I try to find things like listen to music binge watch some old TV shows. Anything to keep my mind from truly thinking. It doesn't always work for me though.

[Michael8072 in reply to jesset]

Night time is the worst for me as well. I try listening to music or binge watching old TV shows. It's nice knowing I'm not alone although I'm sorry your going through it.

[Beevee in reply to Michael8072]

Hi

Anxious thoughts are a by-product of anxiety. It it excessive energy caused by sensitised nerves and coming up for release. This energy desperately needs an outlet. It wants to leave you. It is the mind and body’s way of healing from anxiety. Using techniques to not feel the anxiety, deliberate distraction to stop the thoughts coming stops this energy from being released which is stopping the body’s natural healing process. You are effectively delaying your own recovery by not wanting to feel that energy in all its forms, one of which is anxious thoughts. To recover, learn to accept the thoughts and feelings and leave them be. If you do nothing about the thoughts and feelings, the energy can free flow. If you avoid, suppress or add more stress by fighting with yourself, those energy levels are continually being topped up and de-sensitisation of the nerves is delayed. Avoidance in any shape or form just keeps all that negative energy trapped within and will keep coming up again and again until you allow it to be released. So, step out of the way of yourselves and allow the natural healing process to do its job and let your nerves de-sensitise so that thoughts and feelings return to normal, leaving a peaceful mind and body.

[Michael8072 in reply to Beevee]

I get what your saying and it makes sense but what if those feelings are to much to handle and just let be? Sometimes some thoughts you just don't want to hear. Even though they are just thoughts and aren't true.

[Beevee in reply to Michael8072]

I’m afraid that is where you may unwittingly be keeping yourself in the anxiety cycle by fearing those thoughts. They are just a figment of an anxious mind, grossly exaggerated by your anxiety and given a false importance. I had many, many scary thoughts that stung like a nest of angry hornets. I would recoil in fear. I would question them and spend ages trying to make sense of them but all this did was to pour more fuel on the fire. Allow space in your head for those thoughts you don’t want to hear and don’t give them any respect and let them go. The more you practice letting go, the more those thoughts lose their power to shock and gradually fade away. I had terrible thoughts about my wife. For a long time, I thought I would have to leave just to get away from the thoughts but knew that would be avoiding. I learnt to ride the storm and let them be there, faced them and accepted that they would scare me. I can categorically tell you that all those thoughts, every single one, were completely false. They just disappeared without trace. You know this so why do you try to avoid them or not allow yourself to hear them? You can’t stop them coming. As my mind and body healed, those thoughts and feelings melted away. To recover, it is absolutely vital to let the thoughts come and do nothing to try and change that or add fuel to the fire by battling with your own mind. That is a battle you will never win. The mind will calm itself if you let it.

[Michael8072 in reply to Beevee]

Thank you for the reply and the info. I will certainly try my best at letting the thoughts be.