I’m extremely tired of living with so much struggle. I’m up on this mountain and am not ready to climb back down. I am tired of people in my life wanting wanting wanting. I’m tired tired tired. I’m angry and irritable. I don’t need judgement now; I need support. I want to just say forget it all, all that I do. What if I just stopped? Doing it all? What if I died? Today. I feel terrible about myself. I feel like sh*€! I’m always looking after everyone I realize as I step back. I’m depressed and with racing disturbing thoughts. Whose going to be there for me? I can’t even talk to my family about this, I just can’t right now. So instead I share here and some things that can help me to remember now are:
After every difficulty comes ease.
It helps to recall that many things can seem worse than they actually are because of the illnesses I have. They will look better again it just takes time.
My heart is still loving even though I am angry and in pain.
I can look pretty not monsterous as I see myself now.
I can accomplish, I just need a break.
I take good care of my family to the very best of my ability.
I’m growing, I’m learning, I’m healing.
I am thankful to have people on here who truly care and take the time to try to help.