Just checking in

[Icanbeathis2016]

Hi all. Just wanted to check in over here. Today is definitely one of those days where I am forcing myself to do the extra little things just to see if something is going to happen anyway. Not because i want to but today is filled with anxiety and some physical symptoms that wont leave my mind in worry like the mild headaches, eyes vision funny slightly blurry, feeling unbalanced, when I was laying down earlier to try and take a nap that wasnt successful because i really felt everything or sensation so it ruined my chance to sleep. My head or face feels strained or wierd off and on, felt moments of weakness in my muscles as if I wouldn't be able to stand up or move as usual. And I usually dont have headaches bad or that hurt bad but still the fact that I feel them and they are coming and going I feel uncomfortable. I literally sat on my porch scared, cried a little and just wanted to test myself to see if something was going to happen. I was scared at one point to get up to come fix a sanwhich just because I dont know whats gonna happen next. And funny how yesterday was a decent day for me. Did not feel like this hardly. Went a few places didnt really notice much of headaches. But today is on me. Have anyone ever just said, " Im gonna call my bluff" and just get up or go do something(anything) just to see whats gonna happen? This is literally that kind of day. And this is not fun because even though I'm doing this for a purpose I'm still a little worried or scared of what's happening. Just wanted to check in since I haven't in a minute. I wish us the best.

[Hidden]

Hi..

How we can change from day to day.

In some ways I guess that’s what provides me with hope.

I’m hoping that soon we feel better than we did today..

That overwhelming sadness isn’t nice..

Your not alone 🌷🌺🌷🌺🌷🌺 xxx

[Hidden]

Hello Icanbeathis2016

Sorry yesterday was not the best , me neither , I get migraines and started with one and I know that feeling you get so fed up you could sit and cry

I always say though if we did not have the bad days how would we know when we had a good day

I think I always try and find something positive if I can , sometimes it helps things feel better

Anxiety though makes us want to fear because that is how it stays in control and I always think that to when I feel the fear , anxiety is winning so I have to try and let it know I will be in charge and not " It " not as easy as said but with practice can get easier

I think you do well even though when you have your down days you still make every effort to push through them so you should feel good about yourself for that

I hope the day finished better than it started and you have a lovey weekend

Take Care x

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to Hidden]

Hello. Sorry for the late response. But I thought about what you said, "if we did not have the bad days how would we know we have good days." I thought about your saying that just over the weekend as I had a fairly decent weekend besides still trying to get a long sleep, it was better. I ate really good over the weekend as if i never had an appetite issue. I hope it keeps up.

But then today wants to jump on me and get me again. Trying not to let it win. I kept thinking about my terrible accident of passing out again and thinking if it will happen again.

I also think the weather is unconsciously connected to our psyche. Because I notice a lot of times if its gloomy out or about to rain, I get sad or feel discouraged and then I'll look at the sky and notice its gloomy out. I wonder if there's a connection?

[Hidden in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

Hello

Well really pleased you have been having quite a good time till now and you feel you are dipping a little again but this is how anxiety feels when we are overcoming it

Imagine another illness when you are recovering , you start to feel well and then you have a few off days this can be the same except when we have the off days we have to try and not let them make us feel fearful because that's how the anxiety sneaks it's way in , if you accept it and wait for the better days again and there will be there to come it will not feel as bad

I do think the weather personally can have a lot to do with how we feel , it is Summer here and been a lovely sunny day and same problems as always but somehow you feel you are coping better yet on a rainy day everything feels 100 times worse so for me I do think there is a connection x

[Hidden]

Hope today is a little better for you.

🌼🌺🌼🌺 x

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to Hidden]

Hey hun. Sorry to respond late. My weekend was up and down. But to notice I had an "up" day it helps with my hope through this process. On a positive note. I ate really good on Mother's Day. I ate as if I haven't had appetite issues at all. I hope it keeps up. How's everything going for you?

[Hidden in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

Don’t worry about it , I’m so glad you had some improvement. Really Good news about The appetite too.

I’m nit bad, pretty much like you really up and down ...it’s an ongoing battle , but gives some hope when you have those up days, because we know they do come along...

Good to hear from you 🌺🌷🌺🌷 xx

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to Hidden]

Yes i try to focus on the small victories like that. But why does it seem so HARD to stay positive or keep positive but EASY to fall into the negative traps. Smh...I hate when my negative vibes or thoughts get the best of me. Its like for me to naturally be an innovator, a visionary, and always wanting to enthuse I get so discouraged easily. Thats so wierd. You'd think I could easily shake off the negatives....

[Hidden in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

Ah I know I’m very similar...the negatives have much more impact so they are remembered more...we have to ensure we remember and focus on the positives..it ain’t easy at all I know...

Sometimes it does help to write down the positives, the victories no matter how small. This platform is perfect for that, as people understand and encourage.

Your not alone xx