I finally did it, I found the cure to my anxiety!!!

[Mrworrymaster]

It’s been 2 years since my anxiety kicked in so badly that I could barely continue with my life.

During that time I’ve had numerous doc visits, tests and everything else you can imagine thing to figure out the cause of my anxiety.

Help books. Meditation. Medication. Mindfulness. So on and so on.

During the time of my anxiety I lost my home, I lost my wife and now share custody of my children.

Well, anxiety can’t be all to blame for that last part. But it played its part.

However, through all that. I found my point of anxiety.

It’s crippling and insanely intense, powerful and no stop feelings of being unworthy. Bo one allowed to love me and me but watchin from the outside because I’m not worth the attention or time.

Incredibly unhappy and miserable. My goal was to make others the same. Emotional abuse for my wife and friends. I’m suffering, so why can’t they?

That fed my anxiety too. Unrelenting anxiety because I’m making everyone else miserable because I was miserable.

None of them deserved that. Furthermore, I didn’t deserve that either. I deserve some happiness through this life too.

I haven’t cured my anxiety. In fact, now it’s a part of my depression and guilt for how I treated my ex wife. The point is really that I now know I have a lot of work to do. Work that I’m prepared to do.

Working on ways to enjoy my own life, to love myself. To be happy. To allow myself to be loved and give permission to love.

Giving up on the illusion of control. The inner voice that fuels my negative dialogue I feed myself.

I’ll have to carry the guilt of what I did for a long while. But I’m hoping I can begin to work on forgiving myself someday. I have a feeling when that day comes that I may be able to get ahold of this anxiety thing.

Give yourself permission to love yourself.

[Bird-67]

Well done Mrworry on finding the positive thoughts to get you on the right track to managing your anxiety.

Good luck and keep us posted on your progress please.

[Hidden]

Hello

What a honest post and thank you for that I am sure others will relate

You have made the first step in realising and accepting you anxiety , keep doing this and the only way is up

I understand the guilt you feel but now please let go of that had it not been for anxiety and depression I am sure you would not have treated your family and friends the way you did and you cannot be to blame for having an illness and how it affected you , say sorry to the one's you hurt and move on , the past is past we cannot change that but we can change the future

I hope you will keep letting us know how you are getting on

Take Care x

[poetgirl2 in reply to Hidden]

Lulu.... I have been online searching for something to help me with anxiety on and off for 3 days. I found this community and then I found your paragraph about guilt and blame.... and it was exactly what I needed to read. I just took a picture of it and saved it in my phone. Thank you.

[Hidden in reply to poetgirl2]

Hello poetgirl2

I am so pleased you have found somewhere to help with your anxiety

As much as I find it sad that so many of us suffer it is a relief when you find others that know exactly how you feel because either they feel it to or have done and that alone can help

I hope when you feel ready you might post , we are a smaller Community but we do care and will try and help where ever we can x

[Endlessnightmare in reply to Hidden]

Can I please message you privately? I have some questions/thoughts about your reply that I desperately need discussed/answered

[Hidden in reply to Endlessnightmare]

Yes , I may not be able to get back to you straight away but I will eventually x

[Endlessnightmare in reply to Hidden]

Thank you I just sent it