anxiety : I have been out of hospital 9 months now... - ICUsteps

ICUsteps

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anxiety

Ferndav profile image
9 Replies

I have been out of hospital 9 months now and I’m improving in a lot of good ways but only thing that’s holding me back is my anxiety, It is worst than ever right now, a weird feeling of constantly feeling like I’m being talked about etc and feeling like my close friends and family hate which is causing sleepless night and then the sleepless nights then have me up thinking about my time in hospital and it becomes a vicious cycle, I am still currently waiting to be seen for a 1-1 cbt appointment but does anyone have any advice or going through similar??

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Ferndav profile image
Ferndav
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9 Replies
Sepsur profile image
Sepsur

the only thing that has worked ( and I use the term ‘worked’ very loosely) with bouts of anxiety is to do some box breathing when it is extreme. Therapy is what really helped. It’s horrible - my sympathies

FamilyHistorian profile image
FamilyHistorian

I came out of hospital in March ‘20 into lock down. I had CBT which enabled me to develop strategies for every day life - they were personal to me. I did have anxiety following icu, and in general that is properly under control - not gone but it is nowhere as extreme over what some might say are ridiculous issues. I tend to use methods or a combination of both, one is managing my breathing and the other is dropping into my “safe place” in my head. I can get depressed which I think is different to anxiety. More often than not this is going into a very dark place again when logically you know that you are being ridiculous but can’t stop it and more often than not resulting from an insignificant comment made by someone else. I’m getting better at managing it.

The trauma that we patients go through is not understood by others and likewise we don’t understand theirs. What we all need to try and do is tolerate one another and that’s not easy. It’s not my problem that I have changed!

It takes time for things to get better, they will,

there may be set backs, be prepared,

It’s not “move on” it’s moving on

Gooddaysunshine profile image
Gooddaysunshine

You have my sympathy too. I have been home for 2.5 years after ICU, and can still be triggered by a sight, or sound, or remark.

I also can enter what is called a hyper-vigilant state, when I am on guard as to regards my own protection, apparently this is quite common.

I have been diagnosed with PTSD and anxiety, but like others I have found ways to manage them.

I am fortunate enough to speak to my ICU psychologist once a month. My local authority also provided a CBT course after I had been home about 9 months, but I had to self-refer for that.

It laid out some useful strategies, or work-arounds, that help. Another thing I personally found helps, is writing down aspects of ICU and my recovery.

I do it as fact or fiction depending on my mood, just bite-sized chunks with no pressure on myself to write War and Peace, and that for me is a great stress-reliever.

Good luck with it, and I hope you get an appointment soon.

ZanderB profile image
ZanderB

Yes I was very anxious about an awful lot. Partly because of my vulnerability to Covid (I was in ICU in late 2020) and unwitting avoidance of normal (ie pre-Covid and ICU) life, I found pretty much any activity out of my house induced great anxiety as did anyone coming into the house (might they have Covid?). I was also anxious about my health and return to work. And, yes, this led to my brain working overtime and me not getting enough sleep etc. A vicious cycle.

As I’ve said elsewhere on here, I think the ICU psychologist, anti-depressants (I’d declined my GP’s recommendation a couple of times) and the passage of time have made a huge difference. Infrequent, judicious use of sleeping pills also helped. Lastly, I think focussing on myself (ie not worrying too much about what my family were getting up to), exercise, some travel (just to get away from my usual routine and places) and keeping busy (less time to let the horrid memories surface) helped too. I look back now and can’t believe how far I’ve come but it’s taken a while.

No magic answers but you’re not alone. Great that you’re looking into CBT.

Lux95 profile image
Lux95

Just another voice to let you know you aren't alone. This seems to be a common symptom of an ICU stay and sedation. A year and a half later, and stress is much harder to handle than before. I still don't like crowds and avoid anyone with a cold for fear of getting sick again. Exercise and taking up a relaxing hobby have helped me somewhat. At least I feel like I have an escape. I also try to remove stressful situations as much as possible - no social media, very little news, etc.

It helps to talk to someone who will listen. Family don't and can't fully understand, and that can make the anxiety and loneliness worse. Post here as much as you want or need to if it helps. I have no one to talk with locally that has been through an ICU stay, so I come here to read others' posts, and encourage where I can.

Mytur profile image
Mytur

Hi Frendav, sorry your struggling with anxiety it sounds like a really tough place. I had a stay in ICU last May and only recently was overcome with debilitating anxiety and had to take time off work. I have engaged with both antidepressants and counselling and have found them both to be helpful. Having read all the replies they offer great advice and I suppose it's finding what's right for you. I would just add be kind to yourself, it is a process so it all time and, for me, compassion was the key to facilitating it. Look after yourself and take care.

Mytur profile image
Mytur

Hi Ferndav, just to quietly add anxiety feeds on both fight and flight. As described by Prof Paul Gilbert, Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) compassion consists of courage, non-judgment, kindness and wisdom. Personally this meant for me small steps, overtime that built my confidence, day at a time, with self-care and beginning to trust myself in knowing what was best for myself.

oggyy profile image
oggyy

Hya there and we hope that you continue to improve. Your anxiety is a vicious enemy of what you have been through, look at yourself in a mirror and tell yourself that you are not going to listen anymore to what your imagination is telling you. Start to enjoy your life, laugh at the funny things that are happening around you, believe me when I tell you that your family and friends are NOT against you, they love you to the moon and back, everything that is happening to you is happening in your head. You CAN beat it, you WILL beat it, so get out there and BEAT IT.

Keep us posted on your progress please

Pete.

BigH63 profile image
BigH63

I’m sorry you’re going through this but as I’m reading more it’s a common side affect of ICU and meds unfortunately. I to have this for know reason just lie awake at night worrying about going to the shops or talking to someone? It’s strange as it’s nonsense things that tigger it. I hope we all get over it as it’s debilitating to say the least.

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