Your therapeutic laugh for the day:

Church Ladies With Typewriters

They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank Goodness for the church ladies with typewriters. These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or

were announced at church services:

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.


Scouts are saving aluminium cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.

Proceeds will be used to cripple children.


The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.'The sermontonight:'

Searching for Jesus.'


Ladies, don't forget the rummagesale. It's a chance to get rid of those

things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.


Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.


For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a

nursery downstairs.


Next Thursday there will be try-outs for the choir. They need all the help they can get.


Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the

church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.


At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is

Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.


Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of

several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.


Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased

person you want remembered..


The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment

and gracious hostility.


Pot-luck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.


The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They

may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.


This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across

from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.


The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation

would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast

next Sunday.


Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM . Please

use the back door.


The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the

Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to

attend this tragedy.


Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.

Please use large double door at the side entrance.


And this one just about sums them all up

The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan

last Sunday:

'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.'

6 Replies

  • Thank you Gina!

    I was laughing loud here. We really need you!


  • Gina....I don't know you....but you just got me out of some sadness....thanks for the laughter!

  • This gave me a great laugh :)

  • Wonderful!

  • Than you for the laughs- unbelievably funny!

  • They were great! 😂 Thanks Gina x

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